Bad advice, a ramble and advice and a hello!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Bristol
Posts: 8
Bad advice, a ramble and advice and a hello!
Hello all *sigh*...
I registered and am writing this because I'm hoping it might help me with being sober. I don't think I have the biggest problems with drinking, but I really do think I'm an alcoholic, which really sucks.
I've tried to stop drinking once before, but failed after about a week. Can't remember why I drank again - I think it was as a 'reward' for being off the booze...a very bizarre logic I know.
I mostly drink alone, every evening, to the point of falling asleep. I think I use alcohol as a medicine, to cure anxiety and depression, I really need to get to a doctor. I've been wary of doing this however. I went to the doctor with concerns about my drinking (about a bottle of red every night at that point) and she laughed me out the office. She didn't see it as a problem, but I could foresee something was up. I wish she'd have listened.
I have to do this. My main issue is moderation. I simply cannot have one or two drinks and leave it at that - is that an issue all alcoholics face?
I blacked out for the first time last month, and spent 3 hours talking to my friend over Skype, and although I wasn't abusive, I apparently told them some pretty harrowing stuff about my childhood, and cried a lot. I've also been blacking out more frequently of late and been having interactions with my flatmates, again not abusive, but not ideal.
Lat night I drank a couple of red wine bottles, a four pack of cider, and a bottle of strong vintage cider, and this morning I felt like complete death. I have to change this habit, It's literally killing me. I can do a cold turkey, i sweat a lot at night and hardly sleep, but it's doable. Alcohol doesn't even feel pleasurable in my mouht any more, and sometimes it even feels like my throat doesn't want to accept it.
I've also developed a bad chain smoking habit whilst drinking - this also needs to stop, I can feel it, and almost feel sick from the smoke. Nasty.
I was in the supermarket today buying supplies for a movie night (my flatmates are really good with me atm - trying to get me to socialize more) and I actually found myself contemplating buying a bottle of spirits - "STOP" my sober brain was trying to say, luckily it was heard. I was that close to bringing home a bottle of gin or rum, after feeling like death for the whole day. WTF?!
I ended up buying some bottles of ale, drank half of one, chucked the rest.
I've seen talk of making a plan...could somebody tell me what a sobriety plan is and how they help? It's my birthday in a month, what a great gift to give myself!
Thanks for letting me have the space and time to offload...here's to day 1...
cb x
I registered and am writing this because I'm hoping it might help me with being sober. I don't think I have the biggest problems with drinking, but I really do think I'm an alcoholic, which really sucks.
I've tried to stop drinking once before, but failed after about a week. Can't remember why I drank again - I think it was as a 'reward' for being off the booze...a very bizarre logic I know.
I mostly drink alone, every evening, to the point of falling asleep. I think I use alcohol as a medicine, to cure anxiety and depression, I really need to get to a doctor. I've been wary of doing this however. I went to the doctor with concerns about my drinking (about a bottle of red every night at that point) and she laughed me out the office. She didn't see it as a problem, but I could foresee something was up. I wish she'd have listened.
I have to do this. My main issue is moderation. I simply cannot have one or two drinks and leave it at that - is that an issue all alcoholics face?
I blacked out for the first time last month, and spent 3 hours talking to my friend over Skype, and although I wasn't abusive, I apparently told them some pretty harrowing stuff about my childhood, and cried a lot. I've also been blacking out more frequently of late and been having interactions with my flatmates, again not abusive, but not ideal.
Lat night I drank a couple of red wine bottles, a four pack of cider, and a bottle of strong vintage cider, and this morning I felt like complete death. I have to change this habit, It's literally killing me. I can do a cold turkey, i sweat a lot at night and hardly sleep, but it's doable. Alcohol doesn't even feel pleasurable in my mouht any more, and sometimes it even feels like my throat doesn't want to accept it.
I've also developed a bad chain smoking habit whilst drinking - this also needs to stop, I can feel it, and almost feel sick from the smoke. Nasty.
I was in the supermarket today buying supplies for a movie night (my flatmates are really good with me atm - trying to get me to socialize more) and I actually found myself contemplating buying a bottle of spirits - "STOP" my sober brain was trying to say, luckily it was heard. I was that close to bringing home a bottle of gin or rum, after feeling like death for the whole day. WTF?!
I ended up buying some bottles of ale, drank half of one, chucked the rest.
I've seen talk of making a plan...could somebody tell me what a sobriety plan is and how they help? It's my birthday in a month, what a great gift to give myself!
Thanks for letting me have the space and time to offload...here's to day 1...
cb x
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: London
Posts: 2,040
Hi cb...the link below should help...if I have done it right that is!!!
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/382110-psst-wanna-know-why-im-always-recommending-recovery-plans.html
My recovery plan includes weekly psychotherapy sessions, healthy diet and exercise (2 stone lighter as a result), a daily gratitude list, journalling and listening to recovery and personal development audiobooks x
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/382110-psst-wanna-know-why-im-always-recommending-recovery-plans.html
My recovery plan includes weekly psychotherapy sessions, healthy diet and exercise (2 stone lighter as a result), a daily gratitude list, journalling and listening to recovery and personal development audiobooks x
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: South west uk
Posts: 960
Hello and welcome.
Others out there will give you better advice than me on a recovery plan, so I will leave it to them.
You have made a massive step coming on here and posting, you know what you have to do, I wish you all the best with achieving it.
Keep close to the forums, we are all here to help.
PC
Others out there will give you better advice than me on a recovery plan, so I will leave it to them.
You have made a massive step coming on here and posting, you know what you have to do, I wish you all the best with achieving it.
Keep close to the forums, we are all here to help.
PC
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Bristol
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by Petecrab 
Keep close to the forums, we are all here to help.
PC
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Welcome to SR Chineseblue. I had to make a plan early on to help me through tough times. Make a plan to keep you occupied, a plan for when your AV starts to tell you, "one drink won't hurt", a plan to give you the best chance at breaking this cycle.
Part of my plan was and is to stay close to SR. Use any and all sources of recovery as much as you can. I was literally on SR as much as possible during my early days of sobriety.
Commit to not drinking and reaffirm your commitment every day. Always remind yourself why you are fighting this battle.
You can do this, welcome aboard.
Part of my plan was and is to stay close to SR. Use any and all sources of recovery as much as you can. I was literally on SR as much as possible during my early days of sobriety.
Commit to not drinking and reaffirm your commitment every day. Always remind yourself why you are fighting this battle.
You can do this, welcome aboard.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Bristol
Posts: 8
Always remind yourself why you are fighting this battle.
Thanks ccam1979
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by chineseblue
Thanks PC. I'm enjoying the calmness tonight. It feels great already not chain smoking and getting sloshed. I realise how much I enjoy a cup of tea
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Bristol
Posts: 8
Thank you Soberwolf and Fabela...I have a feeling that I'll need a chat at some point in the next few days!
Well, last night went better than expected. Not sure if I'll be getting more withdrawals today/tonight but I had minor cold sweats, itchy arms and some pretty interesting closed eye visuals.
This had also been the first time I have allowed myself to fall asleep naturally in a long time, and although It did take a long time to sleep, one I did, had a good 3-4 hours. Dreams were of a horror nature.
I realised that for so long, I'd be finishing work, either going online to Reddit or watching a TV Series whilst getting pissed and then not allowing my mind to process all of this information. I have years of negative build up in my brain - ouch.
I also didn't ever think I'd be the sort of person that needed to write a Wellness Toolbox (Thanks for the links up top there) but yeah, I realise now that I'm pretty awful without structure. Also pretty bad at looking after myself, I love my flatmates, but I really need to think about living on my own...I almost feel like I live a lot better when It's just me around.
So not really day 1, more like day 0.5 - but a few really interesting things learned.
Blessings to each and all,
cb
Well, last night went better than expected. Not sure if I'll be getting more withdrawals today/tonight but I had minor cold sweats, itchy arms and some pretty interesting closed eye visuals.
This had also been the first time I have allowed myself to fall asleep naturally in a long time, and although It did take a long time to sleep, one I did, had a good 3-4 hours. Dreams were of a horror nature.
I realised that for so long, I'd be finishing work, either going online to Reddit or watching a TV Series whilst getting pissed and then not allowing my mind to process all of this information. I have years of negative build up in my brain - ouch.
I also didn't ever think I'd be the sort of person that needed to write a Wellness Toolbox (Thanks for the links up top there) but yeah, I realise now that I'm pretty awful without structure. Also pretty bad at looking after myself, I love my flatmates, but I really need to think about living on my own...I almost feel like I live a lot better when It's just me around.
So not really day 1, more like day 0.5 - but a few really interesting things learned.
Blessings to each and all,
cb
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 1,021
Originally Posted by chineseblue
ps...If I were to have a space just to write a daily update for myself, where would the best place be for that on SR?
cb
cb
And welcome to Sober Recovery
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