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-   Newcomers to Recovery (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/)
-   -   Indulge me in a debate (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/390179-indulge-me-debate.html)

yearlander 04-25-2016 09:30 AM

Indulge me in a debate
 
I wrote this on another thread, but would like to see how many people on a more active forum agree/disagree
I have been without drink in my system for 4 years and am very happy.
The reason I post here is because, people who get sober, keep sober and are happy rarely post on these sorts of forums.
Therefore are overlooked, I think.
Everything to do with stopping drinking here seems to be a "struggle"..when lots of people ..like me..found it not a struggle.
But it never gets "out there"
Anyway here it is;

I 100% believe in what Jack Trimpey says. PURE INDULGENCE. You drink to make you feel good. Full stop. Not to "relieve stress" not to "forget things" not for anything . It's not a "disease" a person can't control a "disease"..tell someone to control their cancer, or heart disease, or schizophrenia!
That few hours where you feel on top of the world, after the first drink is what you are chasing.
And any drinker that says they don't take those first drinks to get to feel that way for a couple of hours, is a liar in my eyes.
That is SELF INDULGANCE. That is selfish, and that is a sin..if you want to put it that way.
You (I..all) are just a selfish shite, putting your own comfort before anyone elses, as long as you are comfortable, be damned with the nasty emotions you bring on other people, including your children.
Then crying when it comes back to bite you in the arse with hangovers and consequences and looking for sympathy from other people it has happened to. All drinkers want the pleasure without the consequences.
Drinking is a selfish action..no doubt about it.
And selfishness is a sin..if you believe in Christ and the bible.
It's a sin if you don't believe in that and just believe in being a decent human being!

doggonecarl 04-25-2016 10:06 AM

I am not sure how helpful such a debate would be for a newcomer. We are all welcome to our beliefs, and sometimes those beliefs are best kept to oneself...not debated over.


Originally Posted by yearlander (Post 5922610)
I have been without drink in my system for 4 years and am very happy.

That is all that matters. Congrats on four years sober.

Anna 04-25-2016 10:06 AM

The Newcomers Forum is a safe and welcoming place for newcomers. Respect is essential. Debates over Recovery Methods are not allowed on the Newcomer's Forum. Posts that violate this rule will be removed without notice. (Support and experience only please.)

yearlander 04-25-2016 10:08 AM

I don't understand Anna..what have I violated?

AdelineRose 04-25-2016 10:09 AM

I can't really indulge you in a debate because, I agree with you sooo that wouldn't be a fun debate now would it?

I am not a drinker, I am a recovered heroin addict. But I completely agree that I kept doing heroin because I wanted to be high as %&@#. Sure, once it got to the point that I woke up with serious withdrawals I would tell myself that I only used to make myself not sick...but if that was true I would have done a tiny bit to not be sick and then brought myself to a detox, a rehab, to a suboxone doctor, etc. etc.

I don't not use heroin today because I am "cured" of a disease, I do not use heroin today because I stopped trying to get high and started having self respect, self worth, self love, and am no longer willing to not have a future, my family, or joy in my life.

yearlander 04-25-2016 10:11 AM

Anna
Is it wrong to state a view that people do not have a "disease" but chronic selfishness? Thats only my opinion. Thats why I said "debate" in the title.
I do not know what I have over stepped?
AdelineRose, there isn't a button to press to "like" your post..but I do!

Anna 04-25-2016 10:12 AM

It's just a reminder, that's all.

entropy1964 04-25-2016 10:14 AM

Ok sure. Congrats on 4 years.

madgirl 04-25-2016 10:15 AM

A lot of us newcomers are already beating ourselves up pretty good, year - and a lot of us sincerely want to completely change our lives. I understand what you're trying to say, but telling people they're "selfish pieces of sh-t" isn't going to solve anything.

Having grown up in a very religious household, telling people they're selfish sinners accomplishes nothing either except to make people feel they're worthless.

Yes, it was selfish of me to drink too much. Yes, I drank because I thought it made me "feel good". Yes, it was a poor decision. Mea culpa.

At this point, what I think a lot of us are trying to figure out is why the hell we don't feel good in our own skin in the first place.

Soberwolf 04-25-2016 10:20 AM


Originally Posted by yearlander (Post 5922699)
Anna
Is it wrong to state a view that people do not have a "disease" but chronic selfishness? Thats only my opinion. Thats why I said "debate" in the title.
I do not know what I have over stepped?
AdelineRose, there isn't a button to press to "like" your post..but I do!

Are you a fully qualified Dr ?

Have you got decades of dedicated research ?

Have you done professional research yourself that has helped tens of millions ?

From where I'm sitting you are anonymously wanting to debate your view

Your view is your view believe in it you don't need validation surely ?

Anna 04-25-2016 10:21 AM

I did not say you violated anything.

I posted a reminder.

entropy1964 04-25-2016 10:21 AM

Good post madgirl. I just took the OPs post as his personal experience and his view of himself....or herself.

In early recovery I am so sensitive sometimes. I try to read posts like instructions for setting up my VCR or something. Not let them bring me down. And any perceived personal attacks? Those are the problem of the attacker.

yearlander 04-25-2016 10:21 AM

I am not trying to tell anyone to beat themselves up. God, It's awful the beating you give yourself AFTERWARDS. I'm just trying to say...think of what you become AFTER you start drinking. Obviously not getting across what I mean, so will leave it. :)

Soberwolf 04-25-2016 10:24 AM

Yearlander know when to stop

Nonsensical 04-25-2016 10:24 AM

I don't really care what keeps anyone sober except me, and I am not sure why others feel the need to prove their way is the only right way.

If someone was tearing up their life with alcohol, but then got sober because they believed a giant invisible poop demon was constantly hovering over their head and the next time they took a drink the poop demon would take an enormous dump on them, like Carl, I'd say Good for you for getting sober. Why do I care if they believe in invisible poop demons?

My $0.02.

madgirl 04-25-2016 10:24 AM

Thanks Fricka. Year, I shouldn't even post right now. Typically I love a good spirited debate but I am as raw as a new sunburn.

Anna 04-25-2016 10:26 AM

check your PM box.

ccam1973 04-25-2016 10:35 AM

Congrats on 4 years yearlander.

IMO, your debate isn't constructive or beneficial to the newcomers here so I'm not going to respond, other than to say congrats on your sober time.

yearlander 04-25-2016 10:53 AM

Ok been wrist slapped anyway. If your minds are not open..they are not open..If you want to blame your actions on a "disease" you will..But denying your personal responsiblity is very damaging imo..good luck all

yearlander 04-25-2016 10:55 AM

I also don't see "my" way as the only right way..what is so HORRIFYING on seeing this as YOUR responsibility and NOT a disease?


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