desertsong

I relate. I am incredibly lonely. I just moved to a new city 6 months ago and the only people I know are my employers and the people who work with my child at his school. But that's my fault. I could reach out, I have resources I can tap into ... but my alcoholic brain still wants me to be isolated. I have to overcome that.

madgirl

desertsong - what do you mean about your alcoholic brain wanting you to remain isolated? do you mind expanding on this?

Delizadee

It's kind of a way of your animal brain or addiction voice keeping an Avenue open for drinking in the future. Isolation is a big part of addictions and I found myself isolating long before I relapsed.

I agree, loneliness is hard to deal with.
Have you been to any aa meetings? I really like them for getting out and meeting new people.


"I met wine." That made me smile. I tried making new friends at all different kinds of places and all I ended up being friends with alcohol and misery.
I hope you find a change in circumstances too... have you thought of or tried reaching out to some places that might be able to give you some guidance or suggestions?

Notimetoloose

Hi LW, I liked "I met wine" line as well...Best that we alcoholics avoid wine tasting outings.

Meet-up is a great way to meet new people and have a social outing.

In spring and summer, I swim a bit.
At our local pool, they have supported swimming programs...one of the programs is for women who are carrying too much weight...these ladies have a great time and can achieve a range of motion in the water that would otherwise be unachievable.
Perhaps, there is something like that; that could help with your mobility, weight and get you out and about.

I love the pet idea as well, I have a cat, she is so beautiful.

Berrybean

I think that many alcoholics share a trait of feeling separate. I can be in a room surrounded by people I know at a party, and if I'm alone for a minute I can start feeling awful waves of self-pity and paranoia that no one wants to talk to me, and everyone dislikes me, etc. Since working on my recovery and discussing it with other alcoholics, I know it's a false feeling and force myself to just go join a group of people, or seek out someone who looks like they could do with some company, or go he'll with something. It is a horrible feeling while it lasts though.

Just wondered, have you considered going along to AA? Plenty of folk who you can relate to, and plenty of people you could help by sharing your experiences.

Also, you know those depressing day centres? Much of the time, this is because they don't have things going on. Why not consider helping out there and start some activity groups? Maybe with some of your creative things, or the reading group idea. Or even a meditation group. If the mountain won't come to Mohammed. ....

I hope you find some social outlets soon.