Addict for years. Hit me this week
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 5
Addict for years. Hit me this week
I think I'm still processing things. I started counselling and ****** up the start of my recovery by falling at the first hurdle. Thursday night. Went on a massive mission of self destruct. Even after i was so determined to fix this. So I've wrote a poem:
"You're moving forwards!"
My mind tricked me...
Years have passed but I've stayed still;
Trapped in a desperate attempt to escape,
until I could go no further and I fell.
Comforted by your embrace, you have suffocated me.
Poisoned my body, and clouded my mind.
And yet I still love you?
Slowly but intensely you and I have become locked together.
To be free from you is a place I cannot yet see.
Like a winter storm you chill the air and darken the world.
I thought you wouldn't reach me, and I might shiver as you passed.
But now you are upon me,
Soaking me with my tears
And drowning me in my dependence.
"You're moving forwards!"
My mind tricked me...
Years have passed but I've stayed still;
Trapped in a desperate attempt to escape,
until I could go no further and I fell.
Comforted by your embrace, you have suffocated me.
Poisoned my body, and clouded my mind.
And yet I still love you?
Slowly but intensely you and I have become locked together.
To be free from you is a place I cannot yet see.
Like a winter storm you chill the air and darken the world.
I thought you wouldn't reach me, and I might shiver as you passed.
But now you are upon me,
Soaking me with my tears
And drowning me in my dependence.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome to SR snowflake! Thanks for sharing, you'll find a lot of folks that were in your shoes at some point so we "get it"! Hope you can stick around, there's lots of support and information available here.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
Snowflake, Feeling like a wreck doesn't have to continue. We all know what you're going through. I hope you'll stay with us & post some more - it helps with the anxiety & frustration. Good to have you here.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Welcome,
Remember you are physically and mentally addicted.
It is not about hope. It is science. Fight it w your analytical mind.
Altering the brain and calling it a reason to celebrate, unwind, mourne, or whatever is a lie.
Get clean. Learn how to live drug free.
The help you need is right here.
This place saved my life.
Remember you are physically and mentally addicted.
It is not about hope. It is science. Fight it w your analytical mind.
Altering the brain and calling it a reason to celebrate, unwind, mourne, or whatever is a lie.
Get clean. Learn how to live drug free.
The help you need is right here.
This place saved my life.
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