Back here after a long time away
 

Ok, let's try my real post this time... :)

Hello,

I used to come here quite frequently... and then I didn't. It's been a long time, but today I felt the need to come back. 30 minutes ago I was in my car on the way to the liquor store. I'm not sure how I managed to turn myself around and come home, but I did. There's probably not anyone still here who remembers me from way back when, and that's ok... hopefully there are still some who can relate to how I feel and some of the things that still run through my mind.

Thanks for reading.

It worked. :)

Welcome back..great support here!

Thank God you snapped out of it before you bought and consumed it. I remember that it really did feel like I was in a trance sometimes in the hour that proceeded having a slip. Almost as though I was being operated like a puppet! Can you think of any reason why you almost succumbed? Glad you're back.

It IS like being in a trance! Once I make up my mind to go to the store, it's like I'm on autopilot... have to zone out and just get there and buy the booze before sensibility kicks in and stops me. It's almost like an out-of-body experience, and I even get a bit of a pre-buzz just knowing that alcohol is on its way.

A reason why I almost succumbed... well, my husband is out of town. That's all the reason I need. Opportunity - don't want to waste it! Today is one of those hour-by-hour days.

Yes, that was such a trigger for me too because I drank at home, alone, so when my husband travelled, I drank.

I'm glad you're back and that you decided to not buy alcohol today.

Of course I remember you TSH :)
It's good to see you back. I really hope you stick around :)

D

Hi Dee! :D Hope you're doing well! We should catch up.

I remember you well. :) Glad you're back trying again. :hug: Don't give up, you can do this. :)

Wow this is me!! My brain can feel the effect before I even drink. I'm in the zone. Also when my partner out of town. (Boyfriend of 10yrs). I obsess with the opportunity. Thinking all this through now! Very happy you stopped. Now you know it's possible. You will not regret this decision.

Super glad you turned back around :) And really great that you checked back in here!

My husband is out of the country for 3 months. Plenty of opportunity to really giver! Then be hungover, straighten out, swear off it again......and then REPEAT! Because that is precisely what I'll do...is repeat the insanity day after day until the 3 months are up and then I'll just keep going when he's back. So weird because I don't really wanna drink at all as I'm loving my sobriety, but there's something about the 'free pass' that is enticing....but it isn't really a free pass is it.... because even though I don't have to make excuses to my husband, I'll still have to make them to myself and that would be devestating!

Welcome back!

Hi there, Least! :D

Just for the record, I haven't given up and I've been sober for quite a while. Coming back here just felt like the right thing to do today.

Thanks, everyone, for the messages and support. I've been away from SR for about 4 1/2 or 5 years, I guess. Wow. A lot has happened in that time. My original sobriety date was Oct. 1, 2008 but that clock got reset more times than I could count. I was sober for 263 days that first go-round, but then I couldn't stay sober for more than 3 or 4 months at a time (sometimes a lot less than that). I was on that roller coaster until June 21, 2013. I honestly don't know how my husband tolerated me through it all. It got pretty ugly sometimes.

I don't drink anymore, but I do still think about it from time to time. When my husband is out of town is when the temptation is highest, but I'm usually ok in the end. I came really close to making a bad choice today but I did the right thing. I'm glad I came back here. I don't really have anyone I can talk to about this, so this group is very valuable.

Welcome back, and congratulations on your sober time!!

I have a hard time food shopping. So far I have managed to walk right past the wine section, what I do is tell the section I hate you.... yep I say it out loud. All the hurt I caused my family I now try to put on those darn bottles, they can sit there and mock me,call me to them as much as they want, I hate them.
Welcome back :) I am very new here and so glad I found you guys

any time :)

D

Compared to you I'm a nOOb but welcome back!