retroactive

Hello, its been a while. Since about my birthday I believe.

I am drunk, and wanted to share a few thoughts. First, I am a piece of ****. This is true whether or not I am drinking, it is just a feature of mine. However, I have outlived my personal expectations. I have seen much of the world, and have slept with more women than I have ever had the right to. I have accomplished all of this before turning 23, and while being a piece of ****.

As a piece of ****, I like to drink. Drinking, like most of you, has caused many problems in my life. Other drugs have helped cause these problems for me, no doubt, but I personally blame alcohol for most of it. I have to concede though, alcohol has done me a lot of good too. Alcohol makes me feel good and happy, feelings I am unable to feel in a sober state. I hope I am not triggering anyone, I just wanted to make an honest post about how I feel right now.

Dee74

I hope you'll decide to recommit to recovery retroactive.

I have to say you don't sound too happy to me, and it doesn't seem like you're feeling that good right now?.

There's got to be a better way, man.

You posted here drunk last time too - it's not against the rules or anything and it doesn't trigger me - staright up, I'm not envious

but I wonder if you wouldn't get way more out of the place by posting here tomorrow before you decide to drink again?

Give yourself a chance, and give us a chance to help? Whaddya say?

D

least

I hope you'll give the sober life a chance. It really is a better way of life.

Soberwolf

Hey Retroactive your not a piece of **** first off your suffering as many alcoholics do from alcoholism

I'm going to take a guess that you drink but you don't want to drink deep down ? I remember that hell... all alone isolated & mentally kicking the **** out of myself it's a horrible place to be

I know you have had a drink so the best thing is water & rest - try to pour away any remaining alcohol & book a Dr apt or a visit to your local hospital to ask for help with alcoholism

Try & get some rest bud

Delilah1

Hi Retroactive,

Do you want to stop drinking? If so, there is a ton of support in here.

PurpleKnight

Welcome back Retroactive!!

teatreeoil007

You don't have to feel this way. You can start in a whole new direction. You can change. You can become the person you wish to respect.

sleepie

...self diagnosis goes only so far. It's a good step but what now to address it? Do you want change?

brynn

You say drinking makes you feel good and happy, but you don't sound too happy, retro

I loathed myself 1000x more when I drank. Drinking made me feel suicidal....one of the main reasons I had to give it up. I couldn't stand feeling like that anymore.
I can truly say that since I've been sober I no longer hate myself the way I used to.
I hope you'll give sobriety a chance, too. There's so much more to life.
Xoxo

ccam1973

Glad you're back Retroactive. This place can help, but you've got to be the one that commits.

Listen to the advice that's already here. You won't regret giving up drinking. I don't think i've run across one single person who said... "man, i really love being an alcoholic, all of the drunk nights I'll never remember, feeling like sh** every day, killing my body... there's nothing better".

Dig deep if you want to break this cycle, you have the power. We can help if you want.

Hevyn

I'm glad to see you too, Retro. I hope you'll come back and keep talking. We care about you.

Anna

We're here for you Retro, and hopefully you will make the decision to stop drinking.