Terrible relapse... And I need your sincere help and advises since I am in a panicky mood!
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Join Date: Mar 2014
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Terrible relapse... And I need your sincere help and advises since I am in a panicky mood!
Let me make a brief summary. I was sober for 2 years. I relapsed and drank for 3 months (December 15-March 15) with bad outcomes. I quit back again on March 16. It lasted until April 2 (Saturday). With the worst black out plus suicide attempt plus DUI. I took 9 pills however spit it out. But what if I did swallow them. I was in bed whole day yesterday (Sunday) Right now I am at the airport going away for 5 days which I was looking forward when I was sober. But right now I feel so shaky so ******. Still hangover (even though 24 hrs passed) That pill taking happened yesterday morning. Please help me go through this. I feel anxious. I just saw at the airport that my car was crashed a little bit. That made me feel even worse. Now I feel that something bad will happen. But still I didn't cancel this trip. But I feel so panicky. Please help me get over with this ****** feeling. Need your help 
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
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Mia ~ hi love. I'm glad you're here, that sounds like a very scary time you've had.
I know you decided to still go on this trip, are you sure that's what you want to do?
It might be a good idea if you can see a doctor, even if you see one wherever it is you're going.
Right now, try and take some deep breaths, and have some water if you can.
You are not alone; we are all with you.
I know you decided to still go on this trip, are you sure that's what you want to do?
It might be a good idea if you can see a doctor, even if you see one wherever it is you're going.
Right now, try and take some deep breaths, and have some water if you can.
You are not alone; we are all with you.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
Originally Posted by venuscat 
Mia ~ hi love. I'm glad you're here, that sounds like a very scary time you've had.
I know you decided to still go on this trip, are you sure that's what you want to do?
It might be a good idea if you can see a doctor, even if you see one wherever it is you're going.
I am Thinking this trip will do me good. I am in touch with my doctor. I feel weird and panicked
Right now, try and take some deep breaths, and have some water if you can.
You are not alone; we are all with you.
I know you decided to still go on this trip, are you sure that's what you want to do?
It might be a good idea if you can see a doctor, even if you see one wherever it is you're going.
I am Thinking this trip will do me good. I am in touch with my doctor. I feel weird and panicked
Right now, try and take some deep breaths, and have some water if you can.
You are not alone; we are all with you.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,443
I'm glad you have a doctor on board.
Have you told him/her about this?
It really would be a good idea to make sure you are OK after yesterday.
That was a lot to do to your system, and I imagine it will take a little while to detox from that, so that may be part of why you are feeling shaky.
If you can, try to take deep breaths and drink water....
I know you feel bad right now, and I know from experience what it feels like to see a damaged car and know 'I did this, but I don't remember...'
For me, that feeling meant that I never did it again.
Sending you love. ♥
Have you told him/her about this?
It really would be a good idea to make sure you are OK after yesterday.
That was a lot to do to your system, and I imagine it will take a little while to detox from that, so that may be part of why you are feeling shaky.
If you can, try to take deep breaths and drink water....
I know you feel bad right now, and I know from experience what it feels like to see a damaged car and know 'I did this, but I don't remember...'
For me, that feeling meant that I never did it again.
Sending you love. ♥
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
Originally Posted by venuscat
I'm glad you have a doctor on board.
Have you told him/her about this?
It really would be a good idea to make sure you are OK after yesterday.
That was a lot to do to your system, and I imagine it will take a little while to detox from that, so that may be part of why you are feeling shaky.
If you can, try to take deep breaths and drink water....
I know you feel bad right now, and I know from experience what it feels like to see a damaged car and know 'I did this, but I don't remember...'
For me, that feeling meant that I never did it again.
Sending you love. ♥
Have you told him/her about this?
It really would be a good idea to make sure you are OK after yesterday.
That was a lot to do to your system, and I imagine it will take a little while to detox from that, so that may be part of why you are feeling shaky.
If you can, try to take deep breaths and drink water....
I know you feel bad right now, and I know from experience what it feels like to see a damaged car and know 'I did this, but I don't remember...'
For me, that feeling meant that I never did it again.
Sending you love. ♥
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Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,536
Hi Mia,
I had a similar event with pills too. I got really drunk and just started eating them when prior to getting drunk I had no suicidality. It was so stupid and so very scary. The doctors at the hospital said that I should not have been breathing. It was accidental and caused by becoming hopelessly drunk.
These nervous panicky jitters will pass and hope your holiday does you well, thing is to stop drinking and rejoice in the fact that the pill incident need never return.
I had a similar event with pills too. I got really drunk and just started eating them when prior to getting drunk I had no suicidality. It was so stupid and so very scary. The doctors at the hospital said that I should not have been breathing. It was accidental and caused by becoming hopelessly drunk.
These nervous panicky jitters will pass and hope your holiday does you well, thing is to stop drinking and rejoice in the fact that the pill incident need never return.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
Originally Posted by Steely
Hi Mia,
I had a similar event with pills too. I got really drunk and just started eating them when prior to getting drunk I had no suicidality. It was so stupid and so very scary. The doctors at the hospital said that I should not have been breathing. It was accidental and caused by becoming hopelessly drunk.
These nervous panicky jitters will pass and hope your holiday does you well, thing is to stop drinking and rejoice in the fact that the pill incident need never return.
I had a similar event with pills too. I got really drunk and just started eating them when prior to getting drunk I had no suicidality. It was so stupid and so very scary. The doctors at the hospital said that I should not have been breathing. It was accidental and caused by becoming hopelessly drunk.
These nervous panicky jitters will pass and hope your holiday does you well, thing is to stop drinking and rejoice in the fact that the pill incident need never return.
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 593
I'm sorry to hear of your relapse, Mia. When you joined the March class and then disappeared, I thought about you. That's often a sign that things aren't going well.
Consider rejoining the March class, we'd love to have you back, or the April class if you prefer, and then stay close. Post every day and more when you need to.
Your airport panic sounds familiar. I remember staring at a plate of airport food I couldn't eat, nearly unable to sign my name for it because of the shakes. Never again, huh? You can do this, Mia.
Consider rejoining the March class, we'd love to have you back, or the April class if you prefer, and then stay close. Post every day and more when you need to.
Your airport panic sounds familiar. I remember staring at a plate of airport food I couldn't eat, nearly unable to sign my name for it because of the shakes. Never again, huh? You can do this, Mia.
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: London
Posts: 512
OMG Mia I know exactly where you are right now, when I drank and took pills my anxiety would sky rocket through the roof and I felt like I was plugged into an electric socket! I don't even know how you're managing to get on a plane..... I spent the whole of last year exactly where you are now and my heart goes out to you. Thank you for reminding me of what it was like as I had been thinking of ordering more pills.
It will pass Mia, Ive been off the pills for over a month now and my anxiety is nowhere near as bad.
Sending you hugs from a fellow sufferer.
Elle
It will pass Mia, Ive been off the pills for over a month now and my anxiety is nowhere near as bad.
Sending you hugs from a fellow sufferer.
Elle
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
Dear all,
So lucky to feel I am not alone and we had same experiences so you can all understand me. I came to a heaven like place. Ate some. Drank Coffee. And now cherishing the situation. Shakiness and jittery feelings are going away so is my anxiety. I will join the class immediately. I still Cant believe how all this started just with a single glass of wine I will never ever drink again no matter what!!!
So lucky to feel I am not alone and we had same experiences so you can all understand me. I came to a heaven like place. Ate some. Drank Coffee. And now cherishing the situation. Shakiness and jittery feelings are going away so is my anxiety. I will join the class immediately. I still Cant believe how all this started just with a single glass of wine
I will never ever drink again no matter what!!!
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Hi Mia,
Me too. Was sober for over 2 years and then relapsed for 2 weeks. Then sober for a week and drank again. My relapse wasn't any sort of slow progressing, trying to moderate first exercise but horrible binges from start, very quickly progressing into drinking quantities of alcohol that I had rarely drunk even towards the end of many years of active alcoholism. Like you, I also had thoughts of suicide but did not act on it. I imagine that I could have killed myself "simply" with drinking though, maybe sooner rather than later. I decided to stop it and am now trying to build a recovery regimen again.
The anxiety and panic you are describing sounds familiar. I did my relapse in the middle of one of the most stressful work periods that I can anticipate for this year and it's very challenging to find ways to relax now. My suggestion to you though is that if you feel in acute danger on your trip, find a doctor, ER, or anything that could help immediately. Are you traveling alone or in company? If you are with someone else you trust, talk to them about your feelings. Check in here often. I really sympathize with you but let's stick with the idea that if we don't drink, things will improve a bit every day
Me too. Was sober for over 2 years and then relapsed for 2 weeks. Then sober for a week and drank again. My relapse wasn't any sort of slow progressing, trying to moderate first exercise but horrible binges from start, very quickly progressing into drinking quantities of alcohol that I had rarely drunk even towards the end of many years of active alcoholism. Like you, I also had thoughts of suicide but did not act on it. I imagine that I could have killed myself "simply" with drinking though, maybe sooner rather than later. I decided to stop it and am now trying to build a recovery regimen again.
The anxiety and panic you are describing sounds familiar. I did my relapse in the middle of one of the most stressful work periods that I can anticipate for this year and it's very challenging to find ways to relax now. My suggestion to you though is that if you feel in acute danger on your trip, find a doctor, ER, or anything that could help immediately. Are you traveling alone or in company? If you are with someone else you trust, talk to them about your feelings. Check in here often. I really sympathize with you but let's stick with the idea that if we don't drink, things will improve a bit every day
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
Originally Posted by Aellyce
Hi Mia,
Me too. Was sober for over 2 years and then relapsed for 2 weeks. Then sober for a week and drank again. My relapse wasn't any sort of slow progressing, trying to moderate first exercise but horrible binges from start, very quickly progressing into drinking quantities of alcohol that I had rarely drunk even towards the end of many years of active alcoholism. Like you, I also had thoughts of suicide but did not act on it. I imagine that I could have killed myself "simply" with drinking though, maybe sooner rather than later. I decided to stop it and am now trying to build a recovery regimen again.
The anxiety and panic you are describing sounds familiar. I did my relapse in the middle of one of the most stressful work periods that I can anticipate for this year and it's very challenging to find ways to relax now. My suggestion to you though is that if you feel in acute danger on your trip, find a doctor, ER, or anything that could help immediately. Are you traveling alone or in company? If you are with someone else you trust, talk to them about your feelings. Check in here often. I really sympathize with you but let's stick with the idea that if we don't drink, things will improve a bit every day
Me too. Was sober for over 2 years and then relapsed for 2 weeks. Then sober for a week and drank again. My relapse wasn't any sort of slow progressing, trying to moderate first exercise but horrible binges from start, very quickly progressing into drinking quantities of alcohol that I had rarely drunk even towards the end of many years of active alcoholism. Like you, I also had thoughts of suicide but did not act on it. I imagine that I could have killed myself "simply" with drinking though, maybe sooner rather than later. I decided to stop it and am now trying to build a recovery regimen again.
The anxiety and panic you are describing sounds familiar. I did my relapse in the middle of one of the most stressful work periods that I can anticipate for this year and it's very challenging to find ways to relax now. My suggestion to you though is that if you feel in acute danger on your trip, find a doctor, ER, or anything that could help immediately. Are you traveling alone or in company? If you are with someone else you trust, talk to them about your feelings. Check in here often. I really sympathize with you but let's stick with the idea that if we don't drink, things will improve a bit every day
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 141
Originally Posted by thomas11
Hope you check in while on your trip Mia, take care of yourself. You never have to go through this again, right?
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