My Life, Returned to Me (Countdown to 90!!)
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
My Life, Returned to Me (Countdown to 90!!)
I'm exactly 14 days shy of 90, and I'm happily settling into a very new and different (sober) life. It's better than I could have imagined. I'm free to dream and do now.
I first logged in here at SR in late December, as I was counting down the days before entering a 10-day treatment program which isn't too well known in the states. I had a LOT of feelings and concerns about what life without alcohol would be like. Also many hopes and fears about whether the treatment would work. It helped to talk it out here.
So, it seems appropriate I'd start a similar countdown to my 90-day sober anniversary, which is when I plan to "graduate" from daily participation in this forum.
Right now, daily participation in SR is the only "remnant" of my life as an active addict. I believe it's extremely useful to allow a certain amount of time to think through and process a HUGE life change, like moving out of a life of addiction into a life of health and self-determination. I also believe it's healthy to listen to one's inner clock, and take "next steps" when it becomes time. Stagnation isn't how Nature works. Change is how Nature works.
The experience of living through and surviving addiction will always be a part of who I am, just like the experience of surviving cancer is part of who I am. The question before me now is, "What will the next phase of that look like? How do I take this painful trauma, which I've survived, and make it be a blessing to others?"
It is sobering (hahahahahahahah ) to re-read my early posts and relive the terror and grief of those days. I believed I was going to die.
Now, I'm sure I'll need to reiterate in this thread a few times that the treatment I received is different than how most addicts are treated. I was treated with a 10-day course of intravenous amino acid therapy. While this has been around a while, it's not "mainstream." It has a completely different treatment premise than cognitive-behavioral therapy, AA, counseling, or other standard approaches. So of course my experience has been different.
I'm not at all interested in boring debates about what treatment options are better so puh-leeze let's not start that nonsense in this thread, okay? It is SUCH a negative snoozer, don't you agree?
And puh-leeze let's not hijack this thread, which is about hope and victory, to make it about fear and defeat.
I had a different treatment, a different experience, a different "flavor" to my recovery. My personal story is the only one I'm qualified to tell. And what a story.
My life, returned to me.
I first logged in here at SR in late December, as I was counting down the days before entering a 10-day treatment program which isn't too well known in the states. I had a LOT of feelings and concerns about what life without alcohol would be like. Also many hopes and fears about whether the treatment would work. It helped to talk it out here.
So, it seems appropriate I'd start a similar countdown to my 90-day sober anniversary, which is when I plan to "graduate" from daily participation in this forum.
Right now, daily participation in SR is the only "remnant" of my life as an active addict. I believe it's extremely useful to allow a certain amount of time to think through and process a HUGE life change, like moving out of a life of addiction into a life of health and self-determination. I also believe it's healthy to listen to one's inner clock, and take "next steps" when it becomes time. Stagnation isn't how Nature works. Change is how Nature works.
The experience of living through and surviving addiction will always be a part of who I am, just like the experience of surviving cancer is part of who I am. The question before me now is, "What will the next phase of that look like? How do I take this painful trauma, which I've survived, and make it be a blessing to others?"
It is sobering (hahahahahahahah ) to re-read my early posts and relive the terror and grief of those days. I believed I was going to die.
Now, I'm sure I'll need to reiterate in this thread a few times that the treatment I received is different than how most addicts are treated. I was treated with a 10-day course of intravenous amino acid therapy. While this has been around a while, it's not "mainstream." It has a completely different treatment premise than cognitive-behavioral therapy, AA, counseling, or other standard approaches. So of course my experience has been different.
I'm not at all interested in boring debates about what treatment options are better so puh-leeze let's not start that nonsense in this thread, okay? It is SUCH a negative snoozer, don't you agree?
And puh-leeze let's not hijack this thread, which is about hope and victory, to make it about fear and defeat.
I had a different treatment, a different experience, a different "flavor" to my recovery. My personal story is the only one I'm qualified to tell. And what a story.
My life, returned to me.
The fact that you've found something that works very well for you is fantastic, and sharing it is fantastic too. But please keep in mind that we are a community that embraces ALL methods equally. And we are an open forum for public discussion of them.
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
I don't think that discussion of different treatment options is a "snoozer", in fact it's wholly appropriate here in the newcomers forum. Keep in mind that there are many here that are still trying to find a way to get sober and I don't think I'd classify any of this as "nonsense" for them.
The fact that you've found something that works very well for you is fantastic, and sharing it is fantastic too. But please keep in mind that we are a community that embraces ALL methods equally. And we are an open forum for public discussion of them.
The fact that you've found something that works very well for you is fantastic, and sharing it is fantastic too. But please keep in mind that we are a community that embraces ALL methods equally. And we are an open forum for public discussion of them.
However, if you don't like my tone, feel free to have this thread removed. I'd like to do a countdown, but it's not a necessity. Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Hi, congrats on your progress. From your post comparing your treatment and recovery with others', one thing that strikes me is that most of us definitely need much longer "treatment" and more varied tools for sustained recovery. You are putting them into contrast with yours actually here, not others. I'm glad if your method works so well, good for you!
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 58
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
It's been a long and painful journey, but thankfully, the end did finally come. The gratitude I feel, and the relief, is beyond my ability to put into words.
I really think the key is to keep trying and never give up. Freedom exists, and it is very sweet, and it's worth every tear shed along the way.
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
Hey, all. I'm not going to complete this thread here, because I've gotten involved in a private squabble that I don't think is useful for anybody. So, I'm going to go ahead and make an early sign-off.
My final thoughts are these: Recovery is possible. It takes many shapes and forms. It's very important to keep an open mind. The field of addiction treatment is advancing all the time, so if you're still struggling after decades...don't give up, because you may only be one more attempt away from finding freedom.
Try the tried-and-true methods, and also try the roads less traveled. Your key may be found anywhere, so don't rule anything out.
I've made some SUPER friends here and look forward to continuing our acquaintance well into the future.
My final thoughts are these: Recovery is possible. It takes many shapes and forms. It's very important to keep an open mind. The field of addiction treatment is advancing all the time, so if you're still struggling after decades...don't give up, because you may only be one more attempt away from finding freedom.
Try the tried-and-true methods, and also try the roads less traveled. Your key may be found anywhere, so don't rule anything out.
I've made some SUPER friends here and look forward to continuing our acquaintance well into the future.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 494
I wish you well sis. I was really looking forward to hearing about your treatment and your life afterwards. I understand what you were saying about not wanting to get into which method is best "nonsense" That the DEBATING which is best is nonsense. And only bogs things down and leads away from what you are trying to get across.
Will you not change your mind and just write your story anyway? There can only be a "debate" if you choose to enter into one 😀
Will you not change your mind and just write your story anyway? There can only be a "debate" if you choose to enter into one 😀
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