skywalker91

Has anyone taken off substantial time off work and school to get sober? I don't mean a 30 day stay at an inpatient rehab but keeping it low key/stress free for a good few months (6) to even maybe a year (if one can afford the time no kids etc?)Or is that a drastic decision? I know everyone has a different path to what worked for them but I will appreciate it if you guys can share if you know anyone that has done something like this as I am thinking I might need to do this. In the time off I wanted to do outpatient and therapy but I feel that I will be judged by others (relatives) as being lazy or not hard working enough. Moreover I love staying busy and delving into career and school but I think by doing that I avoid to make time for therapy and outpatient. Is this a good tactic? What worked for you?

doggonecarl

Only you can decide what you need to do to get and stay sober. Recovery should be your number one priority and you should do what it takes to support the decision to get sober.

That being said, I didn't take off from life to get drunk. I worked, was married, had responsibilities, and drank. A lot. So I didn't even consider taking off from life to get sober. The time I spent drinking I spent sober and working on my recovery. But that's me. However, if I had failed to get and remain sober, I hope I would have done whatever it took to recover.

FormerWineGirl

Hi Skywalker, I didn't have the option of taking time off from my job, especially to the degree you are suggesting. I dare say that the majority don't.

If you really want to do it and you have the ability, that's great. Have you considered though how you would fill your time beyond outpatient and therapy?

Everyone is different. Perhaps you have a list of a thousand ways to productively fill your time. You would definitely need a solid plan in place. Wishing you the best on whatever route you take.

doggonecarl

Will you be bored? Lots of people here on SR cite boredom as the reason they drink and if they could only stay busy enough, they could stay sober. I don't happen to agree with that...most of us drank though every kind of situation and frame of mind...boredom being just one of them.

But what is your view of boredom and its effect on sobriety?

SobrieTee

I took six months off work and did both outpatient and therapy. I recently went back to work (I'm only at about 8 months sober). I had the same worries you do, and they kept me from getting help for a very long time. I kept trying to take short cuts, and things only got worse for me. Now I feel SO much better, not only in my sobriety but in life. I realize I don't care what family or friends think of me - I don't owe anyone an explanation for taking time off. I know I would never be where I am now if I didn't take the time to take care of myself. Feel free to PM me if you want! Best of luck

Delizadee

Being out of work for a long time and a stay at home, work at home mom, I didn't have a good basis to get back out into real life sober. After a long and seeming fruitless search for a job and continual relapses, I allowed myself the time and space to get and be sober properly. I think each of us has to figure out what's best for us by using all the tools available to us to find what works best. I know for me I ended up needing and using the down time to really get better. But I also protect my sobriety and continue to move forward with life, because time doesn't stop for anyone. Living sober successfully means learning to integrate yourself back into real life too.
Do what you need to do to build a strong sobriety base.

skywalker91

I feel that boredom is a double edged sword. However, I do think boredom in early sobriety is important because sometimes we make ourselves soo busy that we don't deal with the reason we used in the first place. Then, the first time we get some decent down time we end up relapsing. Which is what I feel had happened with me.

skywalker91

Thank you! I am going to make a list of things to do if I take this route. To be honest I am still debating on which masters program to apply to/ what type of work resonates with my goals. Therefore, I also don't want to jump back into where I was career wise before I relapsed because I am not sure what my next move should be yet. It sucks not knowing but I do appreciate the option of having the choice to pursue what I want. But before I get to any of that I want to prioritize therapy and outpatient.

skywalker91

Amazing! I think we definitely can relate. You mentioned that you did both outpatient and therapy does that mean that you didn't do AA? I am thinking of trying outpatient before giving AA a shot or simply sticking to outpatient. Also, it's hard because my family is definitely trying to help me stay sober but in a way all their different suggestions and opinions sometimes make it more hard to figure out what works best for ME. So glad that taking off worked for you. What else did you do to pass time? And what did you do when you had cravings on your way to outpatient/therapy (if you had any)

skywalker91

For sure! I think having a base to slowly integrate back into the real world is important. I definitely am still figuring out what tools work best for me and I hope God willing I will figure it out soon

SobrieTee

I did AA, outpatient, and therapy all at once. My OP is over, but I still go to AA meetings every week. My advice is to try anything and everything you can, and then figure out what works best for you. Recovery methods are, for the most part, not mutually exclusive, and I found it worked best for me to take bits and pieces of different things. To pass the time... I exercised a LOT. I watched a lot of netflix and movies. I took my dogs on many hiking trips. I read. At first I was frustrated with all the extra time, but as I got more into working my recovery I found I could deal with it better. Personally, I needed to learn how to slow down in life. I was always on the go 24/7, which caused a lot of anxiety, which I always relieved with alcohol. Through sobriety, OP, AA, and therapy, I've learned how to better balance my life.

As far as cravings, I gave my bank and credit cards to a family member for at least the first month, and I didn't keep any alcohol in the house. When I had cravings I had no choice but to ride them out because I had no access to alcohol. As time went on I became stronger and learned how to better deal with cravings, but in the beginning I couldn't trust myself.

grubby

Time off is good for you, at least that's been my experience.

I didn't work at all the first half of 2014 and it helped a lot. I have serious doubts that I would have been able to stay sober had I been chained to a job somewhere.

I also can't imagine trying to show up to work with 0-2 hours of sleep (withdrawal), I just don't know how that would've been humanly possible.

I guess it's a personal choice. If you have saved up vacation time, etc I don't see the harm, but that's just me

AnvilheadII

in early sobriety, i worked a not quite full time job, so had a bit more FREE time some day.....those days and weekends, i'd double or triple up on meetings. The Noon, the 5 and the 7:30. I was lucky to have an AA Hall not far from my house and it became my second home!!!

If you can afford that length of time off AND you plan to stay 100% committed to your recovery first and foremost, then go for it. but use that time wisely.

skywalker91

Wow! I definitely am not at the point where I can completely trust myself so I think I will also give away my card and maybe even cell phone when I go out to outpatient/therapy. Thanks for the tip. I will try all the different methods and see which works best for me. Thank you

skywalker91

Can you please share what you did in that first half of 2014? And what habit did you gain in that first 6 months that has stuck with you the most for your recovery?

Fly N Buy

Many have done what you ask. You might check out sober living houses around the country set up for this very purpose. Most require finding local employment at some point.

Willing to go to any lengths, yes.

Saskia

I was already retired when I started trying to get sober. That extra free time only works if you are truly able to make very good use of the time. I spent about 2 years trying to stay sober and having multiple relapses. I finally did an IOP and AA and psychotherapy and eventually a few months on meds and am now feeling much more comfortable.

We can share our experiences but what will work for you is impossible for any of us to predict. Just keep in mind that you can do this, whether or not the conditions are ideal. You might ask yourself this: Do I want to take a big chunk of time off as another pre-condition for working on sobriety?

SoberinSyracuse

What worked for me was becoming re-engaged (not disengaged). I wasn't sure what to expect, but once I was sober, my zest for life and natural ambition returned immediately. I gave due consideration to the well-meaning advice I received about "taking it easy" and convalescing but the fact is... I was well and healthy and ready to get on with life.

So I did! And I'm very glad I did.

grubby

I was unemployed at the time, that's what I "did" lol

Credit cards helped "smooth me over" until I was making money again. I started making money again around July/August or around there. Thinking back I think I did the right thing, I had a rough withdrawal period.

All those credit cards have since been paid off "in full" by the way

Use every tool at your disposal, whatever that may be, to help yourself through this. In my case, I simply loaded up the ole' plastic to cover my bills while I got back on my feet/got better.

skywalker91

Thank you everyone for sharing! It seems like a majority of you guys have suggested taking time off and have also agreed that no one is mutually exclusive. I will take it a day at a time. Tomorrow is my first therapy appointment. I will see how things go after that.