Slipped Up AGAIN...
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by BoatDaddy 
Any suggestions on what I could do or what's worked for you guys? I like walking the neighborhood or exercising but this always doesn't make sense if I'm across town at work.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
What works for most of us is not simply "keeping busy" but finding new ways to look at life and deal with the things around us. I would be willing to bet that there is a little more going on with the reason you decide to go get blackout drunk all of a sudden than just "being bored". A recovery plan is exactly that - a method to help you identify some of the underlying reasons we choose to drink vs some alternative.
Specific to you an example of one of the underlying reasons you many want to explore is your anxiety. When you first came here you stated that you were dealing with a lot of anxiety and that it was one of the reasons you ended up hanging around in bars. I also deal with anxiety and found that even after years of sobriety, I still needed to seek professional help to deal with it. Some counseling and meditation/mindfulness has really helped. Take a read of this post of yours as a reminder.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...really-am.html
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
Originally Posted by BoatDaddy
Any suggestions on what I could do or what's worked for you guys? I like walking the neighborhood or exercising but this always doesn't make sense if I'm across town at work.
So, this all depends on your personality and what you like to do. You sound like an active/physical type. Is that about right? If so, how about some brief exercises you could do right in your office? Here's a youtube query I ran: https://www.youtube.com/results?sear...fice+exercises
Me, I'm kind of a nerdy, intellectual type so I like blogging, reading, or youtube documentaries on arcane subjects.
Here's a query on boredom-busting: https://www.youtube.com/results?sear...o+beat+boredom
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
Originally Posted by BoatDaddy
Actually if I look back I made a conscious decision to quit. I tracked my progress and was successful in quitting because I held myself accountable. But then I made a conscious decision to drink again. For me it's that simple. I know I have an alcohol problem and I just can't drink. And with the help of people in this community I can stop. I just know now drinking at all isn't an option. I just can't do it and for the sake of my wife and kids I just can't go there anymore. I CAN do this!
This is what I learned over many years - simply trying again, doing whatever I did before, was likely to result in the same outcome.
That's not putting you or anyone else down...it's just a fact - I was trying, but in essence doing the same thing over and over.
I had to do more than I was doing to stay sober.
Keeping busy and having a purpose is a great help in staying sober...but it wasn't enough on its own, at least not for me.
I didn't drink because I was bored - although I often saw it that way.
I drank because I had an alcohol problem.
For lasting change to occur I had to get at my alcoholism as well.
This is a great link on making a plan, a plan tailored to your needs.
Give it a read
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Athens, Georgia
Posts: 962
A suggestion that helps me immensely.
Click the link:
Stories of Recovery
go to Juanita U - A Guided Meditation from Steps 10 & 11
Click and listen. You can also right-click and save.
RDBplus3 ... Happy, Joyous and FREE
Click the link:
Stories of Recovery
go to Juanita U - A Guided Meditation from Steps 10 & 11
Click and listen. You can also right-click and save.
RDBplus3 ... Happy, Joyous and FREE
Science and Scripture
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: LA
Posts: 32
Originally Posted by BoatDaddy
I think having pre planned activities that I can go to will help me do (insert activity here) instead of drinking. Almost the way drinking slowly becomes a pre programmed response I just need to consciously do something else. My issue is that I'm in my office and I get really bored of the mundane tasks of the insurance biz and I'll just leave the office and hit a bar on my drinking days. I just need something in my personal toolkit to do.
Any suggestions on what I could do or what's worked for you guys? I like walking the neighborhood or exercising but this always doesn't make sense if I'm across town at work.
Any suggestions on what I could do or what's worked for you guys? I like walking the neighborhood or exercising but this always doesn't make sense if I'm across town at work.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 79
Originally Posted by chiro
In my opinion the antidote is to understand your emotions. Compulsive drinking or any compulsive behavior is an attempt to reverse or regain control over helpless situations or circumstances. When we feel out of control, we regain control with chemicals because it works and is fast and easy. I am not powerless when I decide to get high. I am doing something about how I feel. Of course I was an unrealistic idiot that thought life should be easy and without any pain. Lol. Once I understood and accepted this behavioral psychology, I could regain control with healthy behavior such as working, moving, playing and even praying. Change the channel if you will on how you feel with a more healthy way of regaining control. It took me 44 years to figure this out. I was on autopilot all that time, regaining control over helpless, trapped, inevitable adversity of life, with a quick fix or mood changer of drugs!
Science and Scripture
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: LA
Posts: 32
Originally Posted by BoatDaddy
Best post yet! Thank you!!!!
I still have free will and choice, but now I conduct my thinking with Christ Driven Behavior. This isn't magic, or faith or wishful thinking. This is science and scripture at work. Below is an example of what I am referencing:
Matthew 11:28 "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Life is full of circumstances that cause us to feel overwhelmed and helpless)
Proverbs 29:11 (don't let your emotions control your behavior with Displaced actions ) “A fool vents all their feelings, a wise man holds them in check.”
Romans 12:2 (transform your life with new Direct assertive thinking) “ Don’t be conformed to this world but be transformed with new thinking.”
2 Corinthians 12: 9-10 (Delegate control to God for power over your weakness). “My grace is sufficient for you, there is power in weakness.”
John 14:16 (God will return that control to you with a Helper-Advocate.")
Galatians 5: 22-23 (We get our clarity, values and purpose from the HS. The fruits of the Holy Spirit are values, they result in Christ Driven Behaviors that give motivation and purpose and change behavior) Those fruits or values are: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Ultimately self-control is the empowering value.
When I combined my free will with God's will, my thinking changed, my life changed and so can yours.
Thanks for listening.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 79
Originally Posted by chiro
Full Disclosure: I spent 12 years in college studying the brain and spinal cord and 44 years abusing my brain and spinal cord. I learned this behavioral psychology from the Bible and a personal relationship with Jesus Christ (Prayer). Simply stated, I "Intellectually Delegated," control to Christ as my Chief Operations Officer and Christ returned that control to me, (Reciprocal Innervation) as the Chief Executive Officer. I still have free will and choice, but now I conduct my thinking with Christ Driven Behavior. This isn't magic, or faith or wishful thinking. This is science and scripture at work. Below is an example of what I am referencing: Matthew 11:28 "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Life is full of circumstances that cause us to feel overwhelmed and helpless) Proverbs 29:11 (don't let your emotions control your behavior with Displaced actions ) “A fool vents all their feelings, a wise man holds them in check.” Romans 12:2 (transform your life with new Direct assertive thinking) “ Don’t be conformed to this world but be transformed with new thinking.” 2 Corinthians 12: 9-10 (Delegate control to God for power over your weakness). “My grace is sufficient for you, there is power in weakness.” John 14:16 (God will return that control to you with a Helper-Advocate.") Galatians 5: 22-23 (We get our clarity, values and purpose from the HS. The fruits of the Holy Spirit are values, they result in Christ Driven Behaviors that give motivation and purpose and change behavior) Those fruits or values are: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Ultimately self-control is the empowering value. When I combined my free will with God's will, my thinking changed, my life changed and so can yours. Thanks for listening.
I refuse to fall into the death spiral of self pity and depression. I am in control of my actions and certainly reactions to life's many obstacles but Christ certainly has the road map laid out and I submit to his plans. I'm prayerful and my resolve has strengthened. Your words meant more than you know and remind me of why I'm committed to being clean and sober.
Science and Scripture
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: LA
Posts: 32
Originally Posted by BoatDaddy
Amen Brother!! Thank you again!
I refuse to fall into the death spiral of self pity and depression. I am in control of my actions and certainly reactions to life's many obstacles but Christ certainly has the road map laid out and I submit to his plans. I'm prayerful and my resolve has strengthened. Your words meant more than you know and remind me of why I'm committed to being clean and sober.
I refuse to fall into the death spiral of self pity and depression. I am in control of my actions and certainly reactions to life's many obstacles but Christ certainly has the road map laid out and I submit to his plans. I'm prayerful and my resolve has strengthened. Your words meant more than you know and remind me of why I'm committed to being clean and sober.
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