Keets

I know I have already posted an intro but wasn't sure where to put this. It was more me rambling on with my thoughts so here you go this is how I see my life and how I feel. I,wasn't sure where else to post it so,feel free to move if it's not appropriate for here.


My drinking can be described as a merry go round. They can be a fun thing but really It's a big circle that just goes round and round . why would I put myself back on that merry go round tha never stops to let you off? That's not what's it's made for its made to go around and around and around, nobody tells the first time to stop or you will get sick. The consequences it's something you have to experience for yourself. Sure it's fun the first few times but than it gets old but than that nasty alochol keeps pushing and pushing you till you can't get off and your just suck in revolving never ending circle. Now to figure how to get it to stop is the tricky part. If you have no support to stop it than who? Do you just off and have some bumps and bruises that are temporary and heal up up after of keep on spinning in that same circle with no end?
I can't say much from experience but i jumped off. My husband was is sill spinning but I'm hoping he will follow in my footsteps and see it didn't kill me. I'm sure most on here know I am on day 10 but I wouldn't be here if I didn't jump off. It did hurt for several days but I am getting better I'm hoping to be strong soon so I don't have to wait for my husband to,jump,and maybe I can slow the merry go round down just a little for him. I know I won't be able to stop it and it will always be there but for right now I'm choosing not to get back on because that would just be insanity especially since how bad it hurt jumping off.

Thanks everyone on here for the support, I,know some might not see it as I do but this is what I see in my head and the best I can describe my experience

opalblue

Well done for jumping off. Yes it is complete insanity. Well done to ten days!

OldTomato

Thanks for the post Keets. I hope your husband follows suit but remember to keep focusing on yourself.

Coldfusion

Congratulations on ten days, Keets!

Just keep reading and posting--you're doing great!

Soberwolf

Congrats Keets

Dee74

great post keets - thank you
Congrats on day 10

D

thomas11

That's a great analogy. 10 days is a great start. I hope your husband follows suit.

Keets

Sorry if none of that made sence it was more of a ramble than anything. I just remember going on the merry go round and going faster and faster till we felt like getting sick than getting back on and doing it again. Why? Because it was fun as grown ups we don't see it that way.,I can even recall myself,yelling at my kids stop spinning around and around in circles your going to get dizzy and hurt your self.
Maybe my brain and alcohol are the same a child who's won't listen or is incapable of letting the adult part be right. I'm my kid spinning and spinning around ignoring the parent that is,telling me the consequences and in the 10 days I have been sober I have finally seen this and need to not let that stubborn part ignore the parent.

Anna

Keets, Day 10 is great and you have the right attitude. You are taking care of yourself, and hopefully your example will inspire your husband.

Purplrks3647

Thanks for sharing, Keets! Good analogy - and I'm right there with you (Day 10 tomorrow) - We've got this!

least

Ten days is a good start. Keep going, it gets better the longer you stay sober.

Delilah1

Double digit day count, congratulations Keets!!!

Hevyn

"How bad it hurt jumping off" - perfect description of quitting. I was on the merry-go-round for 30 yrs. It feels so good to be free of it. Thanks for a terrific post, Keets. 10 days is something to be proud of.

Keets

Thanks
I have literally been on for 15 years( half my life literally) now that I am 30 I want to be doing things people my age do well besides the drinking. I have no idea what it like to,be my age due to,drinking all this time.