Mrskw

Thank you! You too.

Dee74

Cheap poison is still poison

D

Mrskw

Very true Dee74 thank you.

Mrskw

So today has been an alright day. Twice I have walked around the booze aisles in the supermarkets but I didn't pick anything up; well, the first trip around I did but I put it back on the shelf. I think it's going to work best for me to just get through 24 hours at a time and not count days. Just get some entire days in and try and get them closer and closer together. If I can get through today it will be 48 hours.

Got a good workout in at the gym; pretty gutted to not be able to get lost in my own music with my headphones on (no phone) but it was okay in the end.

Its getting to that time of the day where I start hankering. So now just need to plan something good for dinner; do some house work, and catch up on threads later on. I think I'll be alright today.

OldTomato

Taking it one day at a time is a great way to get through it. Keep staying busy, I hope you have a good day.

Mrskw

Thank you OldTomato, I hope you're well and having a good day.

Mrskw

Had a bad couple of days, so I desperately need 24 hours.

I can't believe this is where I'm at. I feel like I've gotten myself into a hole and I want out. I need to keeping checking in on the 24 thread because hopefully I'll feel like I can't go back on it.

OldTomato

Stay strong Mrksw, feel free to vent if you need to. Checking in at the 24 hour thread is a great idea, there are a lot of lovely people over there.

Mrskw

Thank you so much OldTomato, I'm so fed up of feeling like this so I don't know why I keep doing it to myself. I don't think there's any reason or logic to it.

How are you today?

OldTomato

It gets better the longer you stay sober, you've been numbing yourself for so long that it will seem overwhelming at first. If you're having a craving try to distract yourself, watch some TV, read a book - or if you can't concentrate go out for a walk or run a bath. Just focus on getting through the hour without having a drink. That drink won't feel as great as you think it's going to, and it also won't get rid of any problems. Do you attend meetings at all?

I'm doing good thank you, I'm off out for breakfast with a friend and then maybe doing something productive when I get home. Haven't decided what that's going to be yet!

Mrskw

Thanks OldTomato that's really good advice! I was thinking i might start training twice a day at the gym, go in the morning and then again when gets to time I normally start craving. I have been to a few meetings but I stopped going, not sure if its for me. Do you go to any?

Sounds like you have a great day planned! I hope you figure out your productive task. enjoy your breakfast!

OldTomato

The gym sounds like a great idea, whatever keeps you busy and keeps your mind off drinking! I try and get to about 5 meetings a week if I can. I didn't like going at first either and had to force myself to go in through the door, I'm glad I did because they really help me. Now that I've settled on the meetings I like I find it a lot easier. But it's true that meetings aren't for everyone though.

Mrskw

I'm so glad it helps you, its great that you go so often! It is actually pretty comforting to know they are there to go to if you need to. I may go to one tomorrow.

OldTomato

You'll have an hour where you're guaranteed not to drink at least! Just listen out for things you can relate to - personally I come out of meetings with no desire to drink after hearing peoples' stories.

Mrskw

That's very true! Thats great that the meetings do that for you; I did actually take a lot from people's stories myself when I was going so it definitely is worth another try I think!

Mrskw

The weather has been really nice today. Been out car shopping with my husband.

Skipped the gym again today (didn't go yesterday) because I was feeling rough; I really really hate that. I hate that it messes with my training and progress. But tomorrow I'm going to try and get two workouts in. Leg day tomorrow.

Been craving on and off since about 3pm, but being out and about with hubster helped and then i've just tried to keep distracted. Sat down to watch American Hustle with a Carb Killa protein bar and plenty of dilute juice.

I find it so disturbing to crave it when I feel so rubbish from it. Hopefully I'll stop believing that AV that ALWAYS says "just one"; because it never, ever is.

Dee74

have you looked through the making a plan links mrskw?
I think having a definite plan can really help

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

D

Mrskw

My liver has had a bit of rest.

I haven't passed out on the couch.

I haven't burned myself on the oven drunkenly making cheese on toast.

I'll remember what I've watched on telly.

I'll remember conversations with my husband.

I'll remember one of my cat's medication.

I'll remember going to bed.

I won't leave the fridge/freezer door wide open overnight.

I won't leave lights on or windows open overnight.

I won't feel rough and regretful in the morning.

I won't come down to the kitchen and see loads of empties.

I won't panic about what I might've put on social media.

I won't wake up with huge bruises.

I will have been alcohol free for 24 hours.

I will feel proud of myself in the morning.

Mrskw

Thank you so much Dee I will have read through sounds like a good idea for moving forward.

Mrskw

So today I haven't stuck to 24 hours; I knew I wouldn't. I'm a stubborn mule and I know the more pressure that I put on myself the harder I will fall so I'm trying to find this balance. I think tomorrow 24 hours will be a hell of a lot easier. Right now I'm all about just getting 24 hours in at all and getting them closer together. 24 hours every other day and then improving on that sounds very do-able and not so scary. Plus i have a mud obstacle course booked for saturday so that should be good incentive! Reading lots of posts on here and giving comfort and encouragement wherever I can.
Things will get better I'm sure now. concentrating on 24 hours at a time is the best for me I think.