RedAndy

Been feeling great the last couple of weeks as I have mentioned recently I described it as feeling like I was riding the crest of a wave, feeling on top of the world and real elation.

One of the main reasons is how well things have been going at home where there were big problems previously relating to and resulting in drink and drugs - of course I had the realisation that this was a major part of the problem and knowing I needed to sort it out for the sake of my own sanity and my family.

That part is the bit I am working at the hardest and the results in the main are amazing however the problem I'm having is massive mood swings that I really can't seem to control, the feeling of elation at times is overwhelming, not wanting to complain about that as it is a good feeling but it does feel that at times its getting too good and too excitable, feel like I've fallen deeply in love with my wife again, another great thing, I can however switch in minutes to extremely low and a feeling of deep depression and can't lift my head hardly, feeling of any form of rejection / conflict / or making decisions results in a panic / feelings of fear and sheer dread and anxiety just comes out of nowhere about literally nothing at times, emotions all over the place.

My wife has been absolutely amazing through all of this and our relationship is the best it has been for over 20 years however she has said that she feels a little overwhelmed by the huge change and I can't comprehend that she doesn't feel the same elation all the time - to the point of feeling immediate and massive rejection and my mood spiralling down uncontrollably - there isn't any really and I know that and I try to reason and rationalise but the utter swing in the mood means its a real struggle to work out what's going on in my head and how I am feeling.

GP also started me on SSRI in November a couple of weeks after I stopped drinking.

In the main the feelings are pretty good but as I said can also feel too good and a crash can start rapidly from literally nothing albeit the lows have been few and far in the last few weeks.

I've had some pretty rough times a few weeks ago and they seem to have died down replaced by the elation - then I ask myself is this just normal - am I over analysing, its driving me nuts at times and then all done and good again perhaps too good.

Thanks for reading and hope I don't sound a bit weird just trying to find a few answers as I keep struggling to get it right in my head.

Soberwolf

Does your Dr know this about the mood swings ? early sobriety is often referred to as a emotional rollercoaster it does balance out but speak to your Dr more in depth about the mood swings

& keep up the good work

RedAndy

Cheers SW - will make an appointment and have a chat with GP.

Soberwolf

Good stuff

Hawkeye13

I felt like a bottle of seltzer water that was shook up in the beginning Andy.
All those emotions I had stuffed from drink just kept bubbling out.

That's what "emotional rollarcoaster" was for me.
Keep talking to your wife, reach out for help from your GP, and see how things go over time.

I was also offered meds but chose not to start them--I am doing meditation / yoga instead.

Hang in there--you are an inspiration

soberclover

I remember having the big mood swings in early sobriety; I still swing but not as far now that I have a few years under my belt

Good idea to keep the dialogue going with your doc who is prescribing medication. While I, too, take medication, the reality is that medication isn't always meant to make thing perfect again....it is to better help me deal with what I need to deal with...for me depression and anxiety. Therapy has helped me in the past.

Good for you for posting! Sobriety is awesome because we get to feel again....but it can be overwhelming at times....just remember to breathe and to take care of yourself.

Dee74

Hi Andy

Like others have said mood swings are common but these sound pretty extreme - I'm glad you're seeing your Dr

D

Anna

I also think it's a good idea to talk to your dr. That's the best way to know if this is normal early sobriety mood swings or something more.

On The Road

Like everyone else has said, mood swings are common. Glad to hear that you're going to your GP to seek advice.

Thumpalumpacus

I had, and still have on occasion, some very wide and fast mood swings, and like you they were related to others not sharing my feelings and in turn that feeling like rejection to me.

What I'm doing is reminding myself that not everything is about me. Her happiness or unhappiness may or may not be related to mine, and it is important for me to detach my feelings from those of others. It's also important for me to listen to them as they explain their feelings so that I can put my own into perspective and context.

I'm not saying that this is what you are or should be doing, but it has helped me, taking this approach. My happiness, sadness, and other emotions are my own, and by thinking about what I'm thinking and feeling, I reduce the frequency and amplitude of my mood-swings.

RedAndy

Thanks guys I really appreciate all the replies and advice, will put that into practice also Thump to try and keep a lid on things.

zlhzlh

Red Andy, I have experienced the same feelings of great love towards my hubby of 22 years, but am also experiencing massive pangs of guilt when I over analyse. I am not having any urges for alcohol at all but like you one day wake up and feel elated and then wake up and panic. I want to say anxiety but it's no where near like the anxiety before. But I want to hold my hubby tight and never let him go, where as before was pushing him away.

least

Mood swings are common in early recovery. I'm glad you're talking to your doctor.

RedAndy

That's pretty much the same for me, also with the alcohol / drugs too those urges have subsided completely at present, something I am thankful for too.

I feel indebted to her as I really do see she saved me from myself, I was definitely self destructing and had treated her so poorly for so long, the fact she has given me another chance and things are working so well I can't thank her enough, she looked after me in my moment of need when so many would have said enough is enough and turned their back, justifiably too. The thoughts of where that was leading keep me away from any temptation that has arisen or may arise down the line and know drinking is no longer an option, I feel I have now accepted that, her words that she wouldn't kick me whilst I was down is something I will never forget, she's helped me back to my feet and I have so much making up to do, don't want to smother her tho but that feeling of wanting to hold her tight is massively overwhelming at times, we are speaking openly and she tells me how happy she is too and I can of course see that which is something I never thought we'd get back.

The arguments have stopped completely, communication is there and we've become best friends again - to cap it our daughter who really did keep us together for so long is absolutely thriving on the new happy family life, to the point that we received a call yesterday from her head of year to advise that she is the pupil of the week for her year but not only that for the whole school out of 1050 pupils, so proud of her.

Sobriety really is so rewarding !!

zlhzlh

That's fantastic news about your daughter!! And really pleased for you Red Andy.

Fabat50

Yep, the Doctor is called for. When I was having major mood swings, highs and lows, they had to change my meds pretty quick. Sometimes, like in my case, SSRIs can make the highs even worse. Is it possible for you to see a psychiatrist rather than just a General Practioner? In my experience they tend to be much more efficient in treating this kind of problem. All the best Fab