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Really loosing it (rookie)

Old 09-17-2004, 11:22 AM
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Unhappy Really loosing it (rookie)

Day 6 since my last night out of drinking. Only had 20 ounces of rum, 15 ounces of crown and 3 or four beer last saturday. Felt bad the nex day and decided to stop. Felt better Monday but for some reason tuesday i really went downhill.

Today is the first time in my life that I know I am craving something, My skin feels like it is on fire, My heart is rapid, I ache all over and the prospect of having a few this evening makes me think I'll feel better.

I hate my wifes know it all tone today when it come s to everything. Yet I LOVE HER.

I can not handle any confusing tasks or confrontation. I really am ready to start again and that scares me. I guess I am an alcoholic. Desperate today. wwd
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Old 09-17-2004, 11:29 AM
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That was a hell of a Saturday night...
Six days later and your body is still feeling the effects. And your mind too. This is where we typically give in and pound some more back, just to get the skin to stop twitching so much. You probably know where that's going to lead if you do...
Desperation is a good place for an alcoholic, believe me.
What are you ready to do today, this very minute, and tonight, to stay sober?
You feel you're ready to maybe go and sit with people who no longer wonder if they're alcoholics, and listen to what they have to say?
It saved my ass when I did just that last year.
There's nothing to lose in giving it a try.
Keep posting wwd2. You don't have to drink today.
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Old 09-17-2004, 11:43 AM
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Thanks Dan, I mentioned to my better half that mamybe I should think about going to an aa meeting.

This is not a huge area and she rather I did not because it truely is not anomynous here in her view.

I was not from here originally and am not in a position to argue.

She has trouble believing that I am going through this much trouble yet she really wishes I could have drank more responsibly. Never ever hurt her but have embarrased a few times when people notice that I am always just a little more drunk than the rest of the crowd.

I don't know what to do.
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Old 09-17-2004, 11:50 AM
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Well, bless your better half, but it's your skin that's hurting, and it's you, not her, that is drinking in an irresponsible and dangerous manner. My belief is that if you feel you need some help, you should be able to get it.
I can understand the concern to a point, but your better half might be truly amazed by who shows up at AA meetings...
At any rate, without knowing where you are, could you possibly drive to another town and catch a meeting? You can find a number for AA in your phone book.
Whatever you do, believe that you're worth the effort of getting some help.
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Old 09-17-2004, 11:55 AM
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I hear you, I just don' want to make her upset especially where admitting this whole thing has weakended me somewhat in the whole spousal balance thing.
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:02 PM
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Originally Posted by wwd2
the whole spousal balance thing.
I hear you there too man...
Well, in the meantime, you have today to deal with, trying to stay sober, and to ease your ongoing withdrawal symptoms. Can you think of things to do tonight that will keep you busy and safe? Assuming you're at work, drive home a different way. Don't go near a bar or a liquor store. If there's alcohol in the house, you have to consider that too.
Mainly though, ask yourself one question. Can I honestly think that I could have just one or two tonight, and then stop?
Trying to figure out if you're an alcoholic isn't really important right now, I think. What matters is that you get over the withdrawal hump, get some decent sleep and enough distance from your last binge so that you can think clearly.
And you can do it. You absolutely can.
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:06 PM
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Thanks , I'll try to stay away from it all. I know I would not stop at just one or two. I want it more now than I ever have. Is there anything I can take to stop the heart papitations. Every few beats its like its in my throat
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:07 PM
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Welcome wwd2!
Take it slow, be patient with yourself, and I hope you consider checking in with a doc, as alcohol withdrawal can have some serious effects. However, if you prefer to go it alone, know that there is a great deal of support. Stock up on multi-vitamins and the supplement melatonin helps with sleep.

Your wife is probably just concerned, and expresses her concern as what we percieve condesending, because afterall they are usualy right, right? *S*... and somebody has to be brutally honest with us, since we don't have the capacity to do so.

I hope you'll stick around! You've got a great community of support just a click away!
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:08 PM
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Call your doctor about the heart thing.
Or go to the ER.
Those people are qualified to help you with that.
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:17 PM
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Thanks, If I tell them it may be alchol related, THEN that will affect any future life insurance I may want right ? I guess I don't need to say anything just to make sure I am healthy?
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:23 PM
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WELCOME ROOKIE,GLAD YOUR HERE.
YOU'VE GOTTEN ADVICE FROM THE BEST OF THEM.
I HOPE YOU GIVE AA A WHIRL.
YOU DESERVE TO FEEL BETTER,HANG TOUGH,STICK AROUND.
...............ted
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:33 PM
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I've never really thought about the insurance and you've given me yet another thing to look into, interesting, and it seems valid, but your doctor visit is supposed to be confidential, and should not keep you from seeking help, and getting a baseline physical. I'd suggest being honest, because there are some medications that can help with the first couple of weeks, and how is he to know to make sure you get the proper medication in the event there is an emergency? I know it makes ya cringe, worry about immediate health now, because fact is, insurance companies can demand any test they want before they pay out, and our alcholism is not hidden when you look at the physiology of our kind.
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:52 PM
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maybe it is just another way to start being honest about how i qunech my thirst. thanks to all, I am going to head in for a check up
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Old 09-17-2004, 12:56 PM
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Honesty will make it much easier man.
Good for you, and good luck.
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Old 09-17-2004, 01:03 PM
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Wishing you the best...take care.

Talia
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Old 09-17-2004, 01:39 PM
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Welcome to SR wwd2;
You got some real good advice from everyone here. I hope you take it.
I'm sending some prayersand positive thinking energy your way. Keep on taking one day at a time, it will get better. Love, Bonni
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Old 09-17-2004, 01:44 PM
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This is not a huge area and she rather I did not because it truely is not anomynous here in her view.
Welcome, WW. Glad you're here. Just remember, anyone who recognizes you is there for the same reason.

God bless,
Joe
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