Old drinking buddies
 

Hi
I'm at 2 weeks sober now :yeah:
Everyday mood, energy and clarity gets better and better.

For many many years, being with friends/buddies has involved binge drinking.
Almost zero times where we haven't been drinking.
That's very much the standard/forced culture for many people here in Scandinavia.

I rarely see those people as much as before anyway,
So I wonder if I should just keep my path clean and avoid them.
Start new friendships that doesn't lean on alcohol.
Or try to be with them while not drinking. I'm sure that will not go well.
Drinking is just so embedded in this social life.
I'm pretty sure, when I see them drink, get buzzed and have fun, I will crave it and let go of the control..

How do/did you handle something like this?
Thank you.

Anyone that drank like I did, I no longer socialize with.
I don't have a problem with being around a normal drinker.

Congrats on your sobriety!

Some friends seem to be synonymous with drinking. It sounds like those are the folks you need to stay away from. When everything in your friendship revolves around binge drinking, nothing good can come from time with them.

Congrats on 2 weeks and starting new friendships away from alcohol is a great idea taking some time out to re-evaluate things is always a good move

I wouldn't recommend being around anyone who's going to challenge your sobriety. I stick around old drinking friends who are happy to meet me in places other than bars. Those who won't do that won't see me!

I'm also a musician, and playing in a band has also always included alcohol.
How can you be rock n roll and dry and controlled? o.O
I really need to reboot my life :nanarock
But I'm ready to go for it.
I part of me also laugh and shudder when I think about the cliché "soberness is boring!".
Quitting cigarettes has been a success overall. But not while drinking with buddies/band.

There are a ton of a recovered musicians who rock out all the time real rock n roll has always been about the love of the music & being a rebel well right now your rebelling against a worn out stereotype which fits right in with being rock n roll you still love music right ? alcohol doesn't deserve your musical mastery its all about perception

Right now I'd say you sound pretty rock n roll

You already answered the question, if it's not going to end well then protect your Sobriety at all costs, alcohol is not the centre of the social universe, there are many people who don't drink or if they do it's secondary to the activity they are focusing on.

With new interests, will come new people, friendships based not on what's in your glass but on other common interests.

As for being a musician, it can be done, some of my inspirations prior to getting Sober were those in the spotlight and in that culture who now play a gig, go to bed with a cup of tea and nothing more!!

You can do this!! :)

Now that I'm sober, I can't stand being around a bunch of drunks. They are boring and annoying to me.

Congrats on two weeks. It's two weeks for me today also... :)

If you do a search on these forums, you'll find at least one thread listing loads of famous musicians who are sober. One of my personal guitar heroes is Johnny Marr of the Smiths, and he just decided to get sober one day, felt that was more of a rock n roll decision than living the cliche.

I'm also in a band (very amateur, but fun) and having a great time. And I also get a lot more practice time in as less time in the pub, and I've never played well while drunk.

After losing my career to booze I'm back being a gigging musician again.

It's entirely possible to be a sober musician - there's examples from every branch of music - Eric Clapton, Alice Cooper, Joe Walsh, Elton John, James Hetfield from Metallica....

For me I had to choose whether I wanted to be a rock star or a musician.

I chose musician.
I'm there for the music, and none of the other BS interests me.

Before I got back into playing tho I took a long time off - I really needed to know I was totally committed to sobriety.

I call it building up my sober muscles. I started small, just jamming, then little cafe gigs....after a few years, I worked my way back up to bar gigs and being around and playing with people who drank and did other various things.

Of course your mileage may vary in the time it takes you to be totally sure of your recovery.

I really am there for the music now.

I've pulled away from one band I'm in cause at the moment it's all about the party with those guys right now.

I'm not tempted in the least but it's very boring and unfulfilling for me to be around that now.

Ironically enough most of these guys threw me out of a band a decade or so ago for being 'too party'...

You can change :)
D

At the risk of being redundant, I also play. It was an adjustment for my 11 fans (all drunks), as well as me, but the consensus is I rock harder and better clean and sober. As for drinking buddies, most have fallen away. I get together with a few good friends who drink, but they know and respect me and my chosen path. No judging. No problem.

One month since my last drink, I'm rediscovering the joy of playing guitar sober, and loving the fact that my chops aren't impaired.

Addendum to musicians in recovery: Stevie Ray made his best music after entering recovery ... and Bon Scott is eternally silent.

Just caught up with this after seeing Dee's post in the Sober Rock Stars thread. There is such a strong link between bands and drinking, it's great to see so many people breaking it.

I've "come out" as sober to my own band, which surprised them, but no bad reactions. Sadly, our keys player appears to be sinking fast in his alcoholism, and hasn't yet accepted he needs help. I'm trying to figure out what I can do, but we don't have a friendship outside the band and only ever really talk about music, so tricky to know how to even bring it up without being told where to go.

OT, people know I'm sober...I just let them approach me.

Mostly they just want me to know they don't drink 'that much'...but sometimes a seed is planted :)

D