Snowball99

Yesterday I woke up at 4 am and realized I had drank 13 beers. I didn't even remember getting the last 6 pack. I don't think I ever felt so disgusted with myself. I just thought that I don't want to be this person.

My usual pattern is every other day or every 3 days drinking about 8 beers. I've wanted to quit for a long time. Yesterday morning was the first really bad hangover I had in a long time. I had to spend most the day in bed. Usually, I get up and don't have a headache, but can still kind of function, not that that is great. But feeling like you're going to die and being too sick to even get out of bed for more than an hour is so much worse.

The only positive here, is that I had an unusually bed experience and that can be a motivator to get past drinking urges.

I know it can get better. It's just has been too hard for me to get through the drinking urges in the past. I keep making excuses and putting it off. All the while, I know this is insanity and I have to quit.

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

Yes, it is insanity and denial plays a big part in addiction so it's easy to put it off or dismiss how bad things are. I'm glad that you're ready to stop drinking. The best thing is to come up with a plan for how you will stop and, just as important, how you will stay sober.

tursiops999

Welcome, Snowball.

Grendhar

I know the feeling .. start out with x amount of beers .. then next day realize I went to the store (no recollection) and ended up drinking a more absurd amount of beer than usual.

We don't have to live like this anymore. I am on Day 6 .. I always used to give in to the first urge. Wish I could tell you why this time is different for me .. why I can ignore the urges. I don't know. The only thing I do know is once you get some momentum going .. a few days built up you don't want to throw them away.

doggonecarl

Sounds like what brought me to sobriety, waking up after a night of uncontrolled drinking and finally realizing the seriousness of my drinking problem.

I knew I had to stop, and did.

Read around the forum. Lots of stories of success. You can get past the urges. In fact, you must if you want to put drinking behind you.

Plure

Welcome! This a great place to share your story, vent, seek advice, hear other's experiences, and get support. People here really do care.

I've had a few of those "oh crap" moments after a night of drinking, so completely understand where you're coming from.

Hang in there!

least

Welcome to the family. I hope the awesome support here can help you get sober for good.

FreeOwl

Boy, have I been there....

I'll tell you one thing; it's been sure nice for the past 26 months to be free of that horrible feeling.

If you CHOOSE.... you can be free, too.

thomas11

All too familiar is the story of how we forget how horrible we felt, and after a few days we think we'll just take it easy and be ok. And it is usually never is ok. It's just back to square one. Welcome

360startstoday

Hello and welcome! Last time I drank (which isn't long ago) I drank all that was left of a 12 pk. I think, 7 beers, I was only planning on one or two. I remember dropping to my knees in the bathroom floor begging God to take this away. Well, that was my moment and I decided to change and finally had the strength to do so.

Snowball99

Thanks Anna,
Beyond doing things like taking care of myself by eating, resting, exercise, etc., I just have to accept the fact that I am going to get urges to drink and feel anxious and irritable, especially for the first week or two. The only choice is to let it pass.

Delilah1

Welcome Snowball,

You will find lots of support on SR!!

Soberwolf

Welcome Snowball having a recovery plan really really helps whether that is here at SR at AA at Smart at AVRT there is lots of choice

Here are some useful links to read over

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html

Zebra1275

Welcome to SR!

Alcoholism is progressive, those hangovers are only going to get worse. Getting sober can cure that.

Snowball99

Hi Grendhar, Congrats on 6 days. I've had easier times quitting in the past, like you are experiencing now. I just accepted that it's going to be difficult. At least with the stronger urges I've been having, it's going to give me some good practice.

Snowball99

Hi doggonecarl, That's good to hear that you had success after realizing your drinking got too out of control. For me, I just don't think I can take the drinking any further and I have to deal with it once and for all.

Snowball99

Hi Zebra,

Yeah, it's definitely progressive. 15 yrs ago, I'd get pretty drunk off of 4 beers and would definitely get really sick if I had 5. Now, I can have 6 or 7 and not get sick. The hangovers actually got better, probably just a function of gaining a higher tolerance.

But this last one, drinking 13 beers, made me barely able to get up out of bed and I had to sleep throughout most of the day, just to get some relief. That experience is scarier to me than having to deal with urges and anxiety while sober.

Snowball99

Hi soberwolf, Thanks for the links. I like the one about urge surfing. I've done something similar for headaches (not hangover headaches) and it works. I'll give it a try.

Hevyn

Snowball, I'm so happy to see you here. This place helped me find the courage to change my life. I was drinking all day when I found SR. I had lost all control and was completely dependent on it. This never needs to happen to you. Welcome!

Hope you feel much better tomorrow.

brynn

Glad you're here, snowball!
Xo