Jacksonbaily

I am once again trying to stay sober (3 days) It's been almost 20 years of struggle. My longest period of sobriety was 4.5 years. Since 2011 I have been binge drinking off and on with up to a year of sobriety since 2011. I was really, really, really bad Friday night, wanted to go out in the cold and die. My sister called the police. I ended up in the emergency ward with a very, very, high alcohol count. I can't take this not being able to maintain sobriety anymore. Divorce, empty nest, makes me sad and lonely. I figure if no one is here to see me I might as well drink... I have been through rehabs, AA, shrinks etc., I am trying something new, this forum.
Thanks for listening and any help you can give me I would appreciate.

FreeOwl

Welcome.

Given what you just shared, I'm going to suggest that - in my experience - it's not AA, Therapy, This Forum, Exercise, Meditation, Gratitude, Major Life Changes, or any other single thing that works to bring about sobriety.

If there IS "one keystone" thing.... in my experience it is this; A committed daily CHOICE to embrace sobriety TODAY, and ACTION to support that choice.

This forum is a wonderful resource - but it is just one of a number of tools. Same with AA. And Therapy. And meditation, exercise, major life changes, gratitude and so much more.

I know that may sound overwhelming, but take it one small change at a time. TODAY - choose sobriety. Choose it out loud. Look in the mirror and tell yourself "TODAY I CHOOSE SOBRIETY", then make one small change today.... take one real ACTION to support that choice.

By the time tomorrow comes, it will once again be TODAY - so don't worry about tomorrow.

sugarbear1

Had you worked with a sponsor to work those 12 steps?

There are many ways to stay stopped.

SR is also a lifesaver!!

Soberwolf

Welcome JacksonBailey

least

Welcome to the family. You'll find lots of support here.

ccam1973

Welcome aboard Jacksonbailey. You've had some long stints of sobriety in the past. Congratulations and you can get there again.

I agree with Freeowl, though, that no recovery program or platform is going to work unless you are 100% committed to yourself. You've got the power to never feel bad again due to drinking.

Lean on us in this community to help you through, but find the reason's within yourself of why you won't drink today... no matter what, you won't drink today.

Welcome to SR Jacksonbailey.

IronPhoenix

Welcome Jacksonbailey - this forum is part of my plan that I am executing and is a big part of keeping me accountable. Post here often - there is a ton of support from folks in all phases of this journey.

StartingOverNW

Welcome Jacksonbaily! Being alone is tough for me too. I think participating regularly in places like this (or any positive supportive group) can help with that, even if they happen to be online.

Jacksonbaily

Wow! Thank all of you! I know the only one that can keep me from taking that drink is ME! It's one day at a time and I know I can't think past today in regards to drinking. I am going to set a goal everyday and keep busy until my job starts again in March. I am staying away from all triggers. Thanks again for making me feel so welcome. Everything I read from all of you were comforting, positivite, supportive, kind and healing words. JB

Dee74

Hi and welcome Jacksonbaily

I had to believe I was worth saving.
If I couldn't quite believe that I had to act like I thought I was worth it until I believed it.

I used this site a lot - IU did everything else I possibly could, but drink - I tired hard to build a new sober life I loved...and slowly things got better.

I know you can do this too - I'm glad you found us

D

Zebra1275

Welcome to SR!

Jacksonbaily

Morning! New day today! Day 4 begins in a positive healthy attitude. I can't wait to go out and face the day! Happy Tuesday!