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Help! Feeling low in recovery...

Old 02-10-2016, 03:54 AM
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Help! Feeling low in recovery...

Hi folks,

Been hanging around for a few months just reading your posts, (thank you for all your shares, thoughts, questions etc.). I'm now just over 3 months sober, but for the past 3-4 weeks, have been really struggling with feeling low, detached from life and anti-social. I've even stopped going to AA meetings because I basically don't want to talk to people. Thankfully I don't feel any cravings at the moment, but I don't want to get complacent!

I've read about PAWS and appreciate that it is going to take a while for my body to recover from over 20 years of hard binge drinking.

I just wanted to ask whether these sorts of feelings are normal and what your experiences were. I am already on a long term high dose of ADs and am concerned they have stopped working...

Many thanks.
C.
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Old 02-10-2016, 04:27 AM
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Hello & Welcome 0511 this community is kind supportive & caring its nice to meet you
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:03 AM
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Thanks for your post, I am new here and I expect I will have to cross the same obstacles as you. Saw a therapist today and yes, from what she said, your feelings are completely normal. Hang in there, 3 months is a real achievement. Let me know how you get on please, yours is the first post I have seen that really illustrates what a challenge this will be.
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:07 AM
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Seems like your going through normal recovery. It takes time and lots of it to repair the damage we did to ourselves. Make sure you stay vigilant and protect your sobriety so you don't regress.
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:22 AM
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Oh yeah...at 3 months in I felt terrible! I didn't see the point in continuing with sobriety. I felt so low. I changed things up...started going to different types of meetings and got a sponsor who made me do the things I didn't want to do. Now things are much easier.

Hang in there...this is normal! Just don't drink!
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:24 AM
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Originally Posted by bravo588 View Post
Thanks for your post, I am new here and I expect I will have to cross the same obstacles as you. Saw a therapist today and yes, from what she said, your feelings are completely normal. Hang in there, 3 months is a real achievement. Let me know how you get on please, yours is the first post I have seen that really illustrates what a challenge this will be.
Yes I'm only at 7 weeks and posts like this help me to prepare for what maybe ahead.
Maybe you should go and see your DR if you think your medication is not working. But yeah it can take a lot longer than 3 months to be out of the woods. I've asked the question as well as read PAWS and a lot of people have said it took about a year before things really turned round for them mentally.
Hold tight and above all else, don't drink !
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:43 AM
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Yes I think this is normal and sounds consistent with PAWS. I had that last go around in 2014 and it was horrible (depersonalization, dizziness, panicky/anxious). Starting shortly after the three month mark I started to feel much better.

This time around (yes I'm stupid for drinking again), it hasn't been as bad but my anxiety is still there and some depersonalization.

Just hang in there; you can get through it!!
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:43 AM
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Welcome to the family and congrats on three months sober!
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:47 AM
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Hiya C. Welcome to Sr.

I had different moods when I gave up. Kept reading everyone's experiences and realised this happens.

Just take it one day, live in each day. It gets better. Having the right tools to deal with your feelings and being prepared if any cravings come along.

Congratulations on three months.
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Old 02-10-2016, 06:40 AM
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Thank you all so much for your welcome and replies. It has brought a warmth to my emotions for the first time in several days. I normally try to do sobriety and deal with health issues, both physical and mental, by myself. I had 2 years sober back in 2007-09, but blew it when I thought that I could 'manage' moderate drinking single handedly. Ha! Cue a further 5 years of crazy boozing, until the penny dropped that I am powerless where alcohol is concerned.

This feels really odd as I just want to hide away by myself - well, with my cat and 2 rabbits. Human interaction seems to be a struggle for me just now. I'm normally a pretty sociable person too. It's a positive step though.
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:22 AM
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Rabbits are awesome I've had rabbits
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:43 AM
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Isolation is alcohol's greatest friend. It splits you off from the herd so it can kill you.

When my daughter died I did not want to go to a meeting for almost 2 years but go I did. 3-4 times weekly.

I have found when I least wanted to go is when I most needed to go. Today I'm still sober and so glad I forced myself to go
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Old 02-10-2016, 09:47 AM
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It's possible that you might want to talk to your dr about changing your antidepressant if he thinks that might help. But, what you're going through right now is quite usual. I really didn't know how to manage my life without alcohol.
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Old 02-10-2016, 05:14 PM
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C,

9 months clean here and I still feel less than perfect.

But, since I was drunk for the last 15 years, this might be perfect.

It does get a bit better every day.

I still crave. Those scars will never heal.

Roll the tape.

Alcohol is poison. Don't believe the hype.
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Old 02-11-2016, 02:40 AM
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Originally Posted by MIRecovery View Post
Isolation is alcohol's greatest friend. It splits you off from the herd so it can kill you.

When my daughter died I did not want to go to a meeting for almost 2 years but go I did. 3-4 times weekly.

I have found when I least wanted to go is when I most needed to go. Today I'm still sober and so glad I forced myself to go
Oh my goodness. I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a child must be one of the hardest things to deal with in life. It is inspirational that you dealt with this whilst maintaining your sobriety.

Life is precious. Time to stop feeling sorry for myself and be thankful for all the good in my life, including not waking up with a stinking hangover for 100 days!

(And you are right SoberWolf. Rabbits rock! They are great wee companions.)
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Old 02-11-2016, 04:53 AM
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Here's a little secret....

Sometimes, life as a human being means feeling low.

Yes, recovery can bring about some intense and volatile emotions. Yes, in many ways it gets better.

But recognize that for many years we 'coped' with feeling low by turning to alcohol and drugs.

An essential part of recovery, in my view, is learning new ways of responding to the normal emotions of life as a human. It gets better - but life doesn't just suddenly turn into sunshine and rainbows and happy dances all the time.

You're going to feel low sometimes.

And that's OK.

And learning to accept the feeling and choose how to respond in a healthy way is key. I find it helpful when Im feeling low to get out for a walk. To go meet with people or at least hit the gym where I can say hello to folks and have a small human connection. It doesnt 'fix' the feeling or make it go away, but it helps me keep going and it helps me with acceptance and it helps me navigate through the low to the other side without falling into a despairing cycle.

AA meetings are great for that. Many is the time Ive slogged off to a meeting when I really didnt feel like it. Mostly, it didn't cure me of the feeling - but it always gave me something. It was always better than just succumbing to the feeling and wallowing in it.

There is a big important difference between acceptance and wallowing.

Im glad youre here with us and sharing. That's a big help. But I hope you'll use this low time as a wonderful opportunity to begin re-training your brain with new and healthy responses to these feelings.

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Old 02-11-2016, 08:12 AM
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I'm only 25 days in but I'm feeling the same way and I don't like it. I feel bored and indifferent with most things right now and I hate that feeling. I'm happy to know its a common feeling though and it beats drinking and feeling awful all the time. Thanks for posting this
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Old 02-11-2016, 08:20 AM
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Originally Posted by MIRecovery View Post
Isolation is alcohol's greatest friend. It splits you off from the herd so it can kill you.
Exactly!
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Old 02-11-2016, 08:20 AM
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Remember that within "bored" can often be found "peaceful".

How can we be bored, when we can paint..... especially if we've never really painted since we were kids and "can't paint".

How can we be bored, when we can take a walk in nature and just notice everything we pass... notice our surroundings, our physical sensations, the way our body feels, the earth underfoot?

How can we be bored, when we can offer to help someone. Our neighbor whose porch could be shoveled, a child who needs a mentor because he has no father, a homeless shelter who needs volunteers, random strangers who could use a smile as we walk down the street....


How can we be bored when we can always find a way to improve our surroundings... decorate a room, organize a shelf, tidy up a yard, get a few piles of laundry done.

Within "bored" can often be found great reward.....

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Old 02-11-2016, 09:38 AM
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Even when we are at our lowest the beauty of recovery is the certainty that things will get better. In my drinking days there was no light at the end of the tunnel. Each day was a little worse and there was no foreseeable end.

There is no doubt life can and will take a crap on you but eventually things will get better as long we stay sober
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