101 Days Ready To Give Up
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
Hey Ghostface, good on you for coming here and posting. You are making this happen even if it is not always easy. The last thing you should think is that you are a failure. You are working so hard and changing your life. Unfortunately we sometimes have to be more patient than we want to be. Keep working at your sobriety and bettering yourself and that change will continue to come.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 636
Thank you guys. I just went to sleep, had a migrane and now I'm up and feeling alot better.
I had to go through my journal I posted here and read a bit and realized that I have come a long way. It hasn't been easy but I'm still here. There are certain people that trigger me and I have to let them go. My job has put alot of stress on me and I fear that I'm close to being unemployed.
Too many thoughts were going thru my head and focusing on the future instead of now got me depressed.
I had to go through my journal I posted here and read a bit and realized that I have come a long way. It hasn't been easy but I'm still here. There are certain people that trigger me and I have to let them go. My job has put alot of stress on me and I fear that I'm close to being unemployed.
Too many thoughts were going thru my head and focusing on the future instead of now got me depressed.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 204
Hey ghostface I'm glad to hear your feeling better.
30 is so young! Don't compare yourself to your friends, we're all on different paths but we will all get where we want to be ( house , marriage, kids etc ) when the time is right, it's not a race. Your doing great! Your sober! Keep moving forward
30 is so young! Don't compare yourself to your friends, we're all on different paths but we will all get where we want to be ( house , marriage, kids etc ) when the time is right, it's not a race. Your doing great! Your sober! Keep moving forward
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 325
Originally Posted by Saskia 
GhostFace, we didn't get to the lousy spot we were in overnight and getting back to a better place won't happen overnight either. Some people find it can take some months (100 days isn't out of the woods, IMHO).
When I look back now at how much effort it took to get and stay sober during the first year, I can't imagine going back to drinking and going through all that again.
If you are struggling, definitely look for ways to ramp up your support network. Think of the first year as a work in progress. Life truly does get so much better :-)
When I look back now at how much effort it took to get and stay sober during the first year, I can't imagine going back to drinking and going through all that again.
If you are struggling, definitely look for ways to ramp up your support network. Think of the first year as a work in progress. Life truly does get so much better :-)
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Awakenings are painful, but one day - maybe today things start to look brighter. Hope follows the action of not picking up a drink. Walk out on faith and soon that regret will be part of your story as you help others.
Triple digits is amazing for people like us........well done.
keep coming back
Triple digits is amazing for people like us........well done.
keep coming back
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Originally Posted by GhostFace
Thank you guys. I just went to sleep, had a migrane and now I'm up and feeling alot better.
I had to go through my journal I posted here and read a bit and realized that I have come a long way. It hasn't been easy but I'm still here. There are certain people that trigger me and I have to let them go. My job has put alot of stress on me and I fear that I'm close to being unemployed.
Too many thoughts were going thru my head and focusing on the future instead of now got me depressed.
I had to go through my journal I posted here and read a bit and realized that I have come a long way. It hasn't been easy but I'm still here. There are certain people that trigger me and I have to let them go. My job has put alot of stress on me and I fear that I'm close to being unemployed.
Too many thoughts were going thru my head and focusing on the future instead of now got me depressed.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 636
Thank you guys, I'm currently at work and haven't gotten a paycheck. This has caused me alot of stress. Bills are due and no income.
I appreciate all the support, I have to now find a way to make money cause it looks like my employer is not able to pay me
I appreciate all the support, I have to now find a way to make money cause it looks like my employer is not able to pay me
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 924
Hey Ghost, good to see you posting.
I always look out for your posts and wish you well, not least because you're just a couple of days ahead of me in your journey.
I too think you're an inspiration. And I don't say that lightly, I truly am inspired by what you have documented about your life and your family and your journey.
I can only wish my eyes had been open to getting sober at such a young age as you. You are years ahead of some people in terms of your maturity, and light years ahead of some people in terms of your determination to turn their life round.
You are actually already achieving something at such a young age that many people never, ever achieve.
Don't look at the past, it's wasted energy.
Look to the future and look to how bright it will be now you're sober.
And I really wouldn't believe this statement, ditch wherever that thought comes from. It's simply not true.
Society has marked me for failure and it's a heavy burden on me. It could be you're struggling a bit with PAWS? I was on my knees last week with depression, it only lasted a few days but it was grim.
Maybe have a look round the Internet about it and see if it fits what you're feeling.
Stay strong GhostFace
I always look out for your posts and wish you well, not least because you're just a couple of days ahead of me in your journey.
I too think you're an inspiration. And I don't say that lightly, I truly am inspired by what you have documented about your life and your family and your journey.
I can only wish my eyes had been open to getting sober at such a young age as you. You are years ahead of some people in terms of your maturity, and light years ahead of some people in terms of your determination to turn their life round.
You are actually already achieving something at such a young age that many people never, ever achieve.
Don't look at the past, it's wasted energy.
Look to the future and look to how bright it will be now you're sober.
And I really wouldn't believe this statement, ditch wherever that thought comes from. It's simply not true.
Originally Posted by GhostFace
Society has marked me for failure and it's a heavy burden on me.
Maybe have a look round the Internet about it and see if it fits what you're feeling.
Stay strong GhostFace
Alive in the Superunknown
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47ºN, 98.15ºW
Posts: 1,460
Hang in there, Ghost. Tot up the positives, too. You have a job, you're confronting the biggest problem-causer in your life head-on, and you're succeeding at that. As mentioned upthread, support groups can provide relief from loneliness, and with people who understand, to boot.
As an aside, the thought occurs to me that by being in your current relationship, you might be passing opportunities for one more enriching ... not to mention being unfair to her.
You're helping me as well as GF with this advice ... thank you.
As an aside, the thought occurs to me that by being in your current relationship, you might be passing opportunities for one more enriching ... not to mention being unfair to her.
Originally Posted by soberclover
Ghostface .........I started typing a response at least three different times as it is hard for me at times to put my words together.......but what I do know about my recovery and recovery in general is that relationships screw things up in early recovery. All kinds of relationships, not just our intimate ones.......but especially our intimate ones really screw us up. So many people relapse because of a bad turn in the relationship. Get to know yourself....you are worth it. Maybe when you do this it will help you identify what the void is in your life. I .able to identify that abandonment was my issue. Serious abandonment issues. I'm learning more about it and what triggers it and how to take care of myself without attaching myself like a leach on to another person.
Don't drink Ghostface....it is never worth it.
Don't drink Ghostface....it is never worth it.
One Day At A Time
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 2,054
I'm glad you are pushing through without drinking, GF- good on you for using SR for what it is so great at, support when times get rough!
Sorry about your income situation- like Dee says, maybe talk to your boss first.
Sorry about your income situation- like Dee says, maybe talk to your boss first.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 469
Stop putting yourself down by saying you're a failure. Who cares about "society". You are the opposite of failure and an inspiration on this forum. I'm hard on myself too so I know how you feel. Try putting your energy into the positive things happening in your life. Gratitude they call it. I think it helps. It just takes some practice. Life will get better for you. Don't go back.
Behold the power of NO
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
I am glad you re read your posts and journal because you have come a long way GF!! Congrats on 101 days and hang in there friend
I am having some very similar stress at work, we have been 60+G in the hole months after months for close to a year now and things look pretty grim.
I do my best to plan for a future without obsessing too much about it and while being mindful of the present. Some days, it's easier said than done.
Just remember: there is no situation that picking up a drink cannot make potentially worst...
I am having some very similar stress at work, we have been 60+G in the hole months after months for close to a year now and things look pretty grim.
I do my best to plan for a future without obsessing too much about it and while being mindful of the present. Some days, it's easier said than done.
Just remember: there is no situation that picking up a drink cannot make potentially worst...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
Hi Ghost:
Couldn't post yesterday but I have been following your thread. I am so proud that you did not given. You are not a failure, you're an inspiration to a lot of us here. I'm following you and we have your back. Remember to keep your eye on the prize.
Negative feelings will pass, now you have flexed those sober muscles. Good job!!!!
Stay close GF. We are rooting for you.
Couldn't post yesterday but I have been following your thread. I am so proud that you did not given. You are not a failure, you're an inspiration to a lot of us here. I'm following you and we have your back. Remember to keep your eye on the prize.
Negative feelings will pass, now you have flexed those sober muscles. Good job!!!!
Stay close GF. We are rooting for you.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 507
As everyone else is saying, you are showing by your actions now that you are not a failure, regardless of what may have happened in the past. You've been a real inspiration to so many people on here. The way you're turning your life around is something to be proud of.
And well done for identifying that voice urging you to drink isn't coming from you, but your AV trying to take advantage of a tough time. Given how much of your current troubles were caused by drinking (the fallout from the DUI and unless I missed an update somewhere the woman you're seeing is presumably from your old heavy drinking lifestyle, not your new sober one) it's pretty clear that dealing with them by drinking again will only make things worse, not better.
As I've discovered over the last 9 months, being sober doesn't make all the problems in the world go away, there are many things we just don't have control over. But being sober sure helps when it comes to dealing with them, keeping them in perspective, and stopping them from becoming worse than they need to be.
And well done for identifying that voice urging you to drink isn't coming from you, but your AV trying to take advantage of a tough time. Given how much of your current troubles were caused by drinking (the fallout from the DUI and unless I missed an update somewhere the woman you're seeing is presumably from your old heavy drinking lifestyle, not your new sober one) it's pretty clear that dealing with them by drinking again will only make things worse, not better.
As I've discovered over the last 9 months, being sober doesn't make all the problems in the world go away, there are many things we just don't have control over. But being sober sure helps when it comes to dealing with them, keeping them in perspective, and stopping them from becoming worse than they need to be.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
