My first experience with an AA sponsor.
 

So today I sat down with a guy who has been in AA and sober for a long time and his sponsor who has been sober a very long time.
It was hard making myself meet with them. As I drove by the local bar I saw all my old buddies trucks lined up outside. I darn near stood them up and went in the bar but I didnt. It went pretty well though. It was honestly somewhat comforting to be face to face with some folks that beat it and were willing to sit down and tell their stories to help a stranger. My first meeting is tomorrow. I sure hope it helps. I sure hope I go.

For me, some of the steps in early recovery were taken on the blind faith that doing what others had done would pay off in the end.

I hope you go to that meeting too!

You can and will do it. The madness is stopping here and now

It will help if you let it help. :)

Sounds like a good move forward vendetta :)

D

I think it is going to help. I think when we keep this a secret it makes us feel like we are alone in a great battle. But embracing support may be just the thing to win. I'm starting to understand that more. Of course at the same time understanding it takes us doing our part.

Sounds like you took a very good first step tonight. Let us know how the meeting goes, vendetta.

I tell you one thing my anxiety over meeting with them today has been so much that I am wore out. I can run on drunk nights with little or no sleep for days. But right now I can barely hold my eyes open. My body is just done.

vendetta, Go to the meeting, what do you have to lose? My first meeting was the scariest thing I've done in a long time. After I was there 15 minutes I felt much more at ease. By the time I left I was enjoying it. Met a lot of really nice people. It was a good meeting, I laughed several times.

I'm so tired I don't even wanna drink. And that's saying something.

I'm going. My friend (she is like a Angel to the likes of which I have never seen) she is making me. And I respect her with all my heart. So if that is what it takes to make me do it for me right now then so be it. And I've thought about that too. I may be doing it cause she is making me but I'm really doing it for myself because I have pride and respect and so even though she is "making" me go. It's what I want to do. So me wanting to do it for others is really me doing it for myself because of my love for others. Hope that made sense.

Make it happen, V. You can do this -- we can do this!

Good going Vendetta. You can do it!

Let us know how it went congrats on making the decision to go - a wise move friend

I feel terrible this morning and no I did not get drunk last night. My anxiety is peeked. I didn't get much sleep I'm shaky and have a headach. I'm actually considering going to work and getting done what I need to get done for the day then leaving early and spend some time downing fluids and just resting. No tv or distraction. Just rest rehydrate and get my head in the right place for my first AA meeting. I don't know if that is a good idea or not but my gut feeling is to make doing what I have to take care of me and stay on track these first few days of sobriety. Maybe even call the sponsor and talk for a while to ease my anxiety.

Maybe even call the sponsor and talk for a while to ease my anxiety.

excellent idea!!!
but remove the maybe even.