Comfortable in your skin today?
 

Am I becoming or have I become comfortable in my own skin?? This is a phrase (posed as the question in this thread) we hear in sobriety. What does that mean to you and where are you in that process today?

I learned from ya'll and others that sobriety is an inside job - I can't change the world around me but can only manage my perceptions of it and how I react to it. I learn to deal differently with anger, frustration and fear. I begin to change, soberly. I bump into concepts like love, tolerance and empathy. I start to believe it is better to seek understanding than to be understood -to love than to be loved - to console as to be consoled (as the prayer of St. Francis tells me.)

I start to feel more at peace, more comfortable in my own skin.
This takes time for me and is a arduous process.

How is your evolution comfort-wise in your skin today?? Does it fit?

getting better all the time!

best fit since as long as I can remember....

:)

Yes! :) I am comfortable with who I am. Such a big change from when I was drinking and hated myself and my life. Now I wake up ready for the day and feeling good. :)

Yes, very much indeed. Alcohol was the one existential thing that was itching me. The rest (finances, weight, etc.) are trivial material details that are easy to solve by comparison.

Before, there was no amount of external fabulousness that made me feel okay. Now, I feel just fine despite external warts.

Alcohol was at the seat of my self perception.

Im comfortable in my skin that sobriety gave me but it takes work and if I work it it works

I have never in my life been more comfortable in my own skin. It's fantastic.

Thank you, sobriety and recovery.

Thanks, Fly N, for this very nice thread.

Couldn't agree more!

This early into my recovery (since January, with one lapse), I'm so happy to discover that I like myself sober.

right at this moment its all good!
being human,that can change,though.
but theres a solution if i become uncomfortable!
and it sure as hell aint a drink!

I had thought going back to drinking would make me more sociable because I was kind of lonely, but it backfired and made me isolate even more because I didn't like anyone seeing me drunk. I remember telling my sister how much I hated myself and thought that was why I kept drinking.

Funny thing is, now that I've stopped pouring booze into me, I don't hate myself at all. I've come to realize that I'm just not a sociable person, that it's okay to be a quiet introvert and I'm actually enjoying my own company a lot now.

And so grateful to be sober again!

Still working on it. Lots of work to do. I plan on getting there though.

Thanks Madbird - I think this is very helpful and was true (the premise) for me as well. We start to discover the real us! Not what we think we are like, but in reality what we are.

Totally agree - frankly, it's not all good on my part......but that recognition gives me an opportunity to change, perhaps. Or at the very least not act on those defects.

Hear, hear!! Or is that here, here?!!
Either way for me it can be a daily sliding scale.

We simply fight the good fight each day.
thanks jsm!

Yes, I'm very comfortable!

(I guess this is what they refer to as serenity)

I don't think the core ME really changes when I'm not drinking. I believe my brain chemistry changes toward the positive, and with a positive outlook, I'm more productive, healthier and generally happier.

I grew up in a bad place (L.A.), and violence was everywhere. The bullying I endured would have criminal repercussions if I were a kid where I live now and today's age. I think those solemn and dark feelings were initially drowned by the booze, then became a way to be back in the darkness that I had grown up in as a child. It was almost like it was my only association with anything. Almost as if I subconsciously found the darkness to be my comfort zone the way a dog is trained to sleep in a cage in the basement.

Interestingly, I am very introspective and thoughtful my first day after stopping, then I have difficulties with cravings for a while before I settle into a sober life where I simply stop thinking about drinking. I think I'm a natural introvert, but I definitely go out more and talk more when I'm sober. Everything is brighter and generally more positive feeling when I'm sober, so I guess that's a better way to be. May as well.

Yes, I think that's right Zebra - thanks!

On a lighter note, I got tickled reading your post while viewing your avatar! If that "horse" can be comfortable wearing striped pajamas, who am I to complain!?

I don't want to be Debbie downer, or in this case, Dropsie downer, but no I don't feel comfortable in my own skin. Never have.

So this is what I am tackling one day at a time.

Not drinking I can say never again, but self defeating behaviour, not yet, but not drinking allows me to try.

I love Soltice's post, I am comfortable in my own darkness. This is what I need to change. Little by little.

Great to hear that some many have gotten there. Good for you. its not an easy journey.

Great thread.