solow

Went to a friends house today, they're a married couple and we're not close really so I had intended to just stay for a cup of tea for an hour. Turns out she (let's call her Emma) had planned a full on meal. Soup course and all so I had to stay much longer than I had planned. What's worse, her husband (let's call him Mike) talks like no one I've ever met. I spent the last hour just waiting for him to take a breath so I could jump in and make my excuses and leave!

By the time I got away it was really late and my brother was messaging me to see if I was ok. I went to send him a message in reply and inadvertently sent a message to Emma instead saying "yeah on my way back now, Mike doesn't shut the **** up."

Oh the horror. Could anything be worse? The language! Why did I have to use such brutal language? Why did it have to be something so rude? After I'd just left them, all politeness and smiles and promises to see them again very soon! I had to expose my deeply flawed and ungracious core in such contrast to the sweet face I'd presented to them all evening!

However, after about 15 minutes cringing into my clenched fists my excruciating embarrassment turned to fits of giggles as I relayed the whole thing to another friend. If I'd still been regularly drinking I would have been in a world of mental torment for days but I was able to let go of it as something I couldn't reverse and saw the funny side instead.

Turns out I can embarrass myself when I'm sober too, but I'm much better at dealing with it!

She replied about an hour later saying "I was just thinking that! "

Axiom

My foot still fits in my mouth too!

Glad you are able to see the humor. It sounds like you have a true friend there.

Martin1883

Nice!

Ariesagain

Emma sounds like a wonderful friend to have!

Amazing how much more resilient we are sober. I'm just beginning to see that for myself today on Day 33.

Great story, thanks.

Cahabr

I am so embarrassed just hearing that story! LOL

chrcarlson

Haha! That's great. I few weeks ago I was speaking with my lawyer at my DUI hearing. He mentioned the kid (ethan couch) that got drunk and killed 4 people. The kid got probation. I said "I wished I had his lawyer!" Now I'm spending 8 weekends in jail.

Nic233

Cringe cringe!! haha sorry but that's funny!!! Emma sounds like such good value!!!

I remember years ago sending a lovely sexually explicit text message meant for my now Ex-Hubby to my Son's Tennis Coach!!! wowsers that was embarrassing to say the least! HAHA

MIRecovery

I know I shouldn't be cracking up but I'm ashamed to say I am. That is so funny.

I think anyone can see themselves doing it but unfortunately you were the unlucky one to hit the lottery

M

MariahGayle

Apparently, I said some things to the Doctor while under anesthesia when I had my tubes tied...still don't know what I said to him but it sure amused the nurses

SoberLife90

Lol. It happened exactly the way it was supposed to!

Thumpalumpacus

Hahahahahahahah

teatreeoil007

I wish my foot would stop growing... It doesn't fit my mouth so well...

SoberinSyracuse

No, no, no, Solow. Things happen for a reason! With the alcohol out of your system, now you can be used for a Higher Purpose.

You see, Emma has suffered her own embarrassment for YEARS 'cuz of Mike's motormouth. And you know for a fact she always coaches him, "Solow will be here any minute. Remember what we talked about?"

But in his heart of hearts, Mike thinks Emma jealous of his natural wit and effervescence. Why, company LOVES him, as shown by how long they linger after dinner, hanging on his every word.

But now... Oh, now... Things will be different now. Now Emma has the text, which she has triumphantly presented to Mike. She has the evidence, the smoking gun.

ROFLMAO.

JoeCree

Yeeeesh. That is indeed cringeworthy. Good laugh though.

Soberwolf

that was classic x

VirginiaWoof

I was crying with laughter at that as it reminded me of the time my ex sent me a text (while we were living together) about his daughter texting to say she was ill so wouldn't be coming round. This was a common occurrence encouraged by her mother so it was a tongue in cheek text about the 'Bat Out Of Hell'. Yup, he sent it to her instead of me.

Glad to see that 'Emma' was in agreement and no harm done :-D

C23

Well, on the bright side, it is one way to make sure Mike shuts the **** up the next time you are over there....ha!

On a serious note, I would rather feel embarrassed in the moment for something I knowingly did rather than have to hear about my shenanigans from others because I have no recollection of doing or saying certain things. I will take that every time.

Aellyce

Oh that was hilarious. And clearly you are not the only one who thinks that way about Mike's conversational style

I can also embarrass myself pretty good sober, can be very outspoken even without the help of alcohol. This is a sort of natural tendency for me and I've learned how to temper it and be more diplomatic over the years, but sometimes I just don't apply the skills. I don't tend to use *** words much just say what's on my mind directly... still comes out in sometimes inappropriate ways and contexts, but oh well. I've actually found a great outlet for it in sobriety: the therapist's office. He says most people struggle for years to be able to speak freely and still won't do it the way I do. Great that the lack of inhibitions comes handy somewhere!

zlhzlh

Hahaha!!!

Zeroine

I've been on the other side. I was astounded to receive an email from a temp in the office describing in explicit detail what she wanted to happen that evening. It seems she sent her boyfriend the Excel file I was waiting for.