Day 2....again
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Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 2
Day 2....again
I am 32 years old and have been heavily drinking for a few years now. As I've seen in a lot of posts, it just progressively gets worse as the disease grabs ahold. I have been checking back on these forums for about a year now, this is finally my first post. I screwed up bad. Ruined 22 days sober, again. It is usually at the 3 week mark that I start to think, this is easy, I can handle a drink or two. That turned into a 6 day bender. I made it about 3 weeks back in September too, then went off the rails and somehow was able to hide it from my wife. This round was especially bad. My wife knew I had been drinking, lying and hiding it. She felt very betrayed. I feel aweful because I was drunk and said horrible things to her. Things I so wish I could take back. She is going to work to get over the damage, but this is basically my last chance. The way I treated her has made the alcohol induced anxiety unbearable the last 2 days. So tired of this and don't want to lose her. I agreed to seek counseling this week, and to make a plan and actually stick to it.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Welcome to the Forum Jackie!! 
I went round in circles for a long time also, but you can draw a line under your drinking and make a permanent change in your life for the better, it can be done and you'll find loads of support here on SR to help you get there!!
I went round in circles for a long time also, but you can draw a line under your drinking and make a permanent change in your life for the better, it can be done and you'll find loads of support here on SR to help you get there!!
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
I'm glad you're here. You can turn this crisis to the positive if you make it your personal tipping point.
The fact you did 22 days means you can do it. For what it's worth, my relapses have occurred around the same time. Tomorrow is 21 days for me. But this time I'm ready.
So jump back on the horse and rack up another 3 weeks, and this time, don't fall off.
The fact you did 22 days means you can do it. For what it's worth, my relapses have occurred around the same time. Tomorrow is 21 days for me. But this time I'm ready.
So jump back on the horse and rack up another 3 weeks, and this time, don't fall off.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 2
Thank you everyone and nice to meet you. Those 3 sober weeks were the best I've felt in a long time, working out a lot, eating well, focusing heavily on work and family. I know I can do it again, for good, but I now realize I need help.
Alive in the Superunknown
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47ºN, 98.15ºW
Posts: 1,460
Originally Posted by JackieTreehorn 
I am 32 years old and have been heavily drinking for a few years now. As I've seen in a lot of posts, it just progressively gets worse as the disease grabs ahold. I have been checking back on these forums for about a year now, this is finally my first post. I screwed up bad. Ruined 22 days sober, again. It is usually at the 3 week mark that I start to think, this is easy, I can handle a drink or two. That turned into a 6 day bender. I made it about 3 weeks back in September too, then went off the rails and somehow was able to hide it from my wife. This round was especially bad. My wife knew I had been drinking, lying and hiding it. She felt very betrayed. I feel aweful because I was drunk and said horrible things to her. Things I so wish I could take back. She is going to work to get over the damage, but this is basically my last chance. The way I treated her has made the alcohol induced anxiety unbearable the last 2 days. So tired of this and don't want to lose her. I agreed to seek counseling this week, and to make a plan and actually stick to it.
You do not want to wait unto the Rubicon is crossed, friend. If she's been good enough, and patient enough, and loyal enough, to work through this issue so far, you've got a keeper.
Of course you're going to have to want sobriety for yourself. You have to. But this can perhaps be one additional factor helping to keep you on the rails.
Don't learn the hard way, like I did.
Best wishes for your sobriety. Make and execute a plan, enlist her support in both those processes, build a support network, and keep reading and posting here -- we're in your corner.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,355
I'm 32 as well. Oh wait I'm 33 now... Crap! It's never too early to get sober.
And it won't get any easier as time goes by. Depending on how much you drank and how often etc it will be much easier to quit now versus 5 10 15 years from now...
And it won't get any easier as time goes by. Depending on how much you drank and how often etc it will be much easier to quit now versus 5 10 15 years from now...
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