Rough Landing, But Day 11
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Denver, CO
Posts: 80
Rough Landing, But Day 11
I've been posting on here for a few months but have recently not managed to get more than 3-4 days of sobriety under my belt. My alcoholism finally managed me- went on a two-day bender; when I didn't show up for work my co-worker (also a volunteer EMT) broke into my house and found me passed out. I had taken a tumble down the stairs and bashed my head and legs pretty badly. A night in the ER and some IVs had me up again. Next day I started in again; this time after a few hours a higher power must have spoken to me as I called the local detox center on myself and got into detox. Turns out this was the place they dump people they pick up on the street to sober up. I was there for 10 hours, felt like crap, then I was assaulted by another guy in the place, punched my head, face, sides, knocked me out of bed...needless to say I felt pummeled physically and emotionally. The following day (a Friday) was awful, I can't remember feeling so bad, ever.
Thankfully I have a loving family. By the grace of god I managed to get myself on a plane that night and fly across the country to be with family. The cuts and bruises are healing, and I am now on Day 11 of sobriety. What a feeling.
In the meantime, I've lost my job over this (was a second strike), but to have my sobriety today is the gift that feels like it really counts. I'm afraid of what the future holds, I have lived alone for some time and know loneliness is my biggest trigger. I am an introvert too by nature but I need to reach out and help others to help myself. But if I can stay sober I also know anything is possible.
Sorry for rambling, hopefully this sharing will help others on this board who are suffering.
Thankfully I have a loving family. By the grace of god I managed to get myself on a plane that night and fly across the country to be with family. The cuts and bruises are healing, and I am now on Day 11 of sobriety. What a feeling.
In the meantime, I've lost my job over this (was a second strike), but to have my sobriety today is the gift that feels like it really counts. I'm afraid of what the future holds, I have lived alone for some time and know loneliness is my biggest trigger. I am an introvert too by nature but I need to reach out and help others to help myself. But if I can stay sober I also know anything is possible.
Sorry for rambling, hopefully this sharing will help others on this board who are suffering.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
We can learn to balance our need to be alone with spending time with other people. Balance. Something we never really did before (at least I hadn't until I got sober).
Learning to live a sober life is awesome!
Learning to live a sober life is awesome!
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
Hi, Sunny! If the price of your sobriety was your job, I'd say you got a very good deal! Thank God you're in a safe place now. Sounds like you really needed a change of venue and supportive people around you. Hang in, keep healing, and stay sober.
Science and Scripture
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: LA
Posts: 32
Originally Posted by SunnyDenver 
I've been posting on here for a few months but have recently not managed to get more than 3-4 days of sobriety under my belt. My alcoholism finally managed me- went on a two-day bender; when I didn't show up for work my co-worker (also a volunteer EMT) broke into my house and found me passed out. I had taken a tumble down the stairs and bashed my head and legs pretty badly. A night in the ER and some IVs had me up again. Next day I started in again; this time after a few hours a higher power must have spoken to me as I called the local detox center on myself and got into detox. Turns out this was the place they dump people they pick up on the street to sober up. I was there for 10 hours, felt like crap, then I was assaulted by another guy in the place, punched my head, face, sides, knocked me out of bed...needless to say I felt pummeled physically and emotionally. The following day (a Friday) was awful, I can't remember feeling so bad, ever.
Thankfully I have a loving family. By the grace of god I managed to get myself on a plane that night and fly across the country to be with family. The cuts and bruises are healing, and I am now on Day 11 of sobriety. What a feeling.
In the meantime, I've lost my job over this (was a second strike), but to have my sobriety today is the gift that feels like it really counts. I'm afraid of what the future holds, I have lived alone for some time and know loneliness is my biggest trigger. I am an introvert too by nature but I need to reach out and help others to help myself. But if I can stay sober I also know anything is possible.
Sorry for rambling, hopefully this sharing will help others on this board who are suffering.
Thankfully I have a loving family. By the grace of god I managed to get myself on a plane that night and fly across the country to be with family. The cuts and bruises are healing, and I am now on Day 11 of sobriety. What a feeling.
In the meantime, I've lost my job over this (was a second strike), but to have my sobriety today is the gift that feels like it really counts. I'm afraid of what the future holds, I have lived alone for some time and know loneliness is my biggest trigger. I am an introvert too by nature but I need to reach out and help others to help myself. But if I can stay sober I also know anything is possible.
Sorry for rambling, hopefully this sharing will help others on this board who are suffering.
The cause is feeling helpless.
The antidote is to regain control over helpless circumstances with healthy, assertive behavior not a quick fix or mood changer of drugs.
The above three sentences are an oversimplification but they go to the core of addiction, which is, "managing your emotions."
The most basic question everyone faces in life is: Why am I here? What is my purpose? Now is the time to consider this with new thinking.
Congratulations on your continued sobriety. Change your thinking, transform your thinking. There is a reason you are sober and writing about it!
Last edited by chiro; 01-25-2016 at 08:08 AM. Reason: grammar
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
I think it's great that you're with family. What a traumatic roundabout way it took to get there. I'm glad you're in better spirits and are healing.
It is scary to lose s job but you have a fresh opportunity to start over once you get sober time under your belt. Free from the past baggage.
Do you have support in place for when you return home? It's something to think about. I attend AA meeting to be around other supportive alcoholics. If that's not to your liking, maybe try volunteering somewhere.
Stay well. 11 days is great. Keep posting here too.
It is scary to lose s job but you have a fresh opportunity to start over once you get sober time under your belt. Free from the past baggage.
Do you have support in place for when you return home? It's something to think about. I attend AA meeting to be around other supportive alcoholics. If that's not to your liking, maybe try volunteering somewhere.
Stay well. 11 days is great. Keep posting here too.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 166
I really appreciate your story and hearing what you have been through. I hope the best for you and you find a good way to keep sober. I really identify with the trouble with reaching out for help. Because of my position in life I felt ridiculous and a fool for being the one in need and reaching for help. But after many failures of trying to do things on my own, with my own mind and knowledge, I came to understand I absolutely could not do it alone. I am very happy you have a loving family as that is a great boon to your recovery. Please keep posting and get all the support you can from many different sources. Sending you the best. John
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
I am so happy that you are safe and surrounded by love -- it what most of us need, but many don't have.
I am sorry the circumstances that got you there, and I hope you will be able to use this to your long term benefit.
Chiro's post is worth pondering -- for me anyway.
You can do this.
PS How bout them broncos -- should be a great super Bowl...
I am sorry the circumstances that got you there, and I hope you will be able to use this to your long term benefit.
Chiro's post is worth pondering -- for me anyway.
You can do this.
PS How bout them broncos -- should be a great super Bowl...
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Denver, CO
Posts: 80
Thanks everyone, much appreciated. And yes, go Broncos!
JohnQPublic, I can relate. I am (or soon will not be) a part owner of my company, but I realize that it only served to overwhelm me at times with responsibility.
And Ruby2, great question. Right now I feel safe with family, and that the stress of work life has been temporarily lifted. The thought of going back and leaving the family is a bit scary now. I feel I need to be totally honest with myself and what I can handle. I don't want to hide under a rock the rest of my life, but I also need to put sobriety first and not be the guy too proud (or scared) to ask for help like before.
When I sent my letter of resignation to my staff last week, I was honest and told them I am an alcoholic who had suffered a relapse. The response so far has been supportive. Among other things I also underestimate people's ability to be compassionate to friends and colleagues who are suffering.
JohnQPublic, I can relate. I am (or soon will not be) a part owner of my company, but I realize that it only served to overwhelm me at times with responsibility.
And Ruby2, great question. Right now I feel safe with family, and that the stress of work life has been temporarily lifted. The thought of going back and leaving the family is a bit scary now. I feel I need to be totally honest with myself and what I can handle. I don't want to hide under a rock the rest of my life, but I also need to put sobriety first and not be the guy too proud (or scared) to ask for help like before.
When I sent my letter of resignation to my staff last week, I was honest and told them I am an alcoholic who had suffered a relapse. The response so far has been supportive. Among other things I also underestimate people's ability to be compassionate to friends and colleagues who are suffering.
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