Dee74

OK, several people have asked me if I was speaking to them here.

When I start a thread it's usually in response to something, but I wasn't writing to anyone in particular, and definitely not trying to make anyone paranoid.

D

Marcher13

This part of Dee's post resonates with me about actions being louder than words. I've been privileged to know Dee for almost three years, the very last thing I would call him is a "BSer".

Dee's honesty and reaching out have been one of the fundamentals to my recovery.

I know Dee wasn't looking for such comments when he wrote the OP but his actions here at SR do speak louder than any promise he may once have made.

I told virtually no-one when I decided to quit finally. I knew that saying I was giving up alcohol would be meaningless unless people saw it.

They see it. It turns out that doing it is way more effective than anything I could say.

Thumpalumpacus

You've got a deft touch -- supportive and still challenging. It's much appreciated, and I know for a fact I ain't alone in feeling that way, bud.

Dee74

I definitely wasn't fishing for compliments., but thanks for the kind words, guys

D

whathaveidone84

I think guilty of that too i say alot and dont follow up on it - i didnt think i was a bser, i thought i simply didnt have the time! How can i find time im busy drinking or being severely hung over!! Not my fault **** happens right ..... Lol these were the deluded things id tell myself - i look forward to being able to follow through on what i say, that would be a great gift for me - great post dee

Soberwolf

Brave words from a good man - I took what D said as he knows what it's like as he's been there he was very honest which I commend & his words were very true & more importantly he don't want no one suffering

A excellent message D

JD

So true Dee. As they say, talk is cheap.

thomas11

I agree Thump, Dee does have a gift in electronic communication. He can be firm, supportive and motivating all in once sentence.

PurpleKnight

A solid post as always Dee!!

ps. usually when a post specifically hits me in the ol' heart strings, it's probably something I should reread and take note of!!

MIRecovery

I believe Dee is talking to all of us. Himself included. At the very least his words ring true with this alcoholic. I may be better than I was but that does not mean I have a long way to go.

bigsombrero

I agree, MI - this post is for everyone, even those with some sobriety under their belts. We don't become perfect when we are sober, we still have a long way to go in the integrity department. Honesty and dependability are building blocks for a long-term sober foundation. We've all BS'ed for enough for two lifetimes, haven't we? Walking the walk feels damn good after a while.

Upward2Enlightenment

You aren't alone MI ... count me in.

Nic233

So so true.. Needed to read this today . Thanks Dee

Fly N Buy

.

ReadyOrNot123

Love this. And while you're not fishing for compliments, you get one from me Dee. I've never come across anyone as insightful and kind and articulate yet softly direct. It's a gift.

I was never confronted with being an alcoholic so the only person I was lying to all those times was myself and that was enough. And I lied to myself plenty - in the end, even though there is a part of me that just doesn't want to go alcohol free forever, I just march on, push it out of the way, hope that in the morning I'll be grateful I didn't cave. And over time, that part of me is getting smaller and smaller and oh so much more manageable. Actions don't just show others you're serious, they show yourself you're serious.

kinzoku

So true.

I think a lot of alcoholics become rather adept manipulators, even manipulating themselves. Everytime quitting was a big show, I failed.

MIRecovery

I led a lifetime of lies to myself and others. I don't believe it is possible to try to function in a normal world and be an alcoholic without being a pathological lier.

I love the line:

What do you get when a horse thief sobers up?

You get a sober horse thief.

My natural state is to lie and just because I'm sober changes nothing. I work on being honest and trustworthy everyday of my life