zigzagging

Hi all I haven't posted for a few days and feel I need to share with you my struggle last night - I REALLY wanted a drink so bad it was almost painful - yes I am aware reading that back how stupid that sounds.
I am on day 21 today and I have started to miss the drink a lot, I am glad I didn't cave in but is it gonna be like this now for a while until this stage passes? I have a dinner date next week with a group of people from my husbands work and I am very worried that if I feel like I did last night I will be drinking by the time they have taken our orders for first course!
Any advice on how to overcome this sudden craving. Also has anyone else experienced tiredness all the time, I thought I would have bags of energy when I gave up drinking but I am tired all the time, is this normal?
Thanks for reading and thanks for just being here when I need you

Berrybean

It's going to take a while to feel comfortable in sobriety - it feels very alien at first and weekends especially (or when we have more time on our hands) can be challenging. I go to AA, and the meeting I go to on Friday night really helps set me up for the weekend. Have you looked into any support groups at all? I've also met some really lovely people in meetings who have now become friends who I spend time with - so, for example, on Saturday I was looking forward to meeting one person at lunch time, and another person at 4pm, and then in the evening I went (alone) to see a dance show at a local theatre. I've found that if I just remove alcohol without replacing it with other things, that's asking for trouble.

Is the dinner date essential? I'd say that IF you feel like you did last week and you feel like it's a danger zone, then don't go. There's plenty of time for dinner dates later on when you feel more stable and confident in your sobriety. Thing is, (if they're friends you can properly relax with) because you're going to be out chatting and eating and having fun, and have something to look forward to, then you might not even feel like you did.

If you decide to go, then put an emergency plan in place. Start a thread like 'first social event in sobriety - tips please' and people will soon chip in with their suggestions.

This will get easier you know.

Steely

I suffer the fatigue too. Still do at one month. Not fair. When I feel the way you are feeling I just know that drinking will not resolve the problem and that tomorrow I will realise that all too late. I also remember the absolute joy I feel when I see what sobriety really has on offer.

mecanix

I was tired for quite a while after giving up , it gets better as long as you stick with sobriety .

We are all allowed to be sick and ill occasionally , might i suggest that if the dinner is causing you anxiety then just throw a sickie , telling a little white lie in protection of our sobriety is ok when faced with people who might not understand the deadly illness we're fighting here .

you are sick and you are ill , it is deadly , you need to treat yourself well and protect your sobriety .
You are getting better and are on the right track

you can do this

have a read here when you get a chance :- http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

Bestwishes, m

teatreeoil007

I can relate zigzag.

Soberwolf

Your doing good Zig & excellent job reaching out

Aurora7431

Congrats on 21 days! Keep it up! One idea to dealing with dinner parties is to order just tonic water and lime or club soda with a splash of cranberry. You won't even miss the alcohol in it. And since these people are from work we aren't going to act drunk/silly in front of them. Have a nice dessert 🍰

ALinNS

I believe being tired when we sober up is par for the course at least in my case, getting the body healthy again takes time. I also know it can be a sign of depression, I was listening to the radio yesterday and there is a study starting here at the medical University and they are looking for people to take part in a study that suffer from being tired/depressed, it's a long advertisement but I could relate to much of what she was saying. Some food for help, never hurts to talk to your doc about it.

Congratulations on staying sober and dealing constructively with the thoughts and cravings, they too go away in time.

Have a great day
Andrew

SoberinSyracuse

Hey, ZZ. I have this sleepiness that hits me several times a day. It's weird. But it beats the heck out of the daily hangover!

Don't be afraid to turn down invitations, and even "obligations" during this time. Remember that sobriety is Job One.

Delilah1

Hi Zigzag,

Great job on 21 days! I completely understand how you are feeling. If it was me I would skip the event. I was part of a strategic planning group for the past year at work, and next Friday they are hosting a "Thank you," happy hour. I declined.

I have in the past used my kids as the reason I am unable to attend an event, or I will say I wasn't feeling well, sometimes I just say I am unable to make it. I am on Day 24 right now, after a few years with on and off sobriety. I am planning on making this on streak permanent, so if I need to skip a few non-mandatory events/activities I am going to do that.

If you do decide to go, I agree that starting a post about attending your first sober event is a great idea.

❤️Delilah