Exact same boat as Number 3's post below. :(
 

I am in the same boat with you sir. Must stop somehow. Work from home, drink beer slowly during the day and then another 6 pints at night. Throw in Jager daily now for 2 years or so, it's killing me. I shake. I can't write. Don't eat. I've caused havoc in my new marriage yet she still keeps me. Doctor has warned me, told me to stop. Blood Pressure is up. On meds for BP, Anxiety and Depression. Booze has ruined my life. Didn't really think about it but I've been doing this for 30 years I'd say. It became normal. Stopped about 5yrs ago for 21 months and went to AA. Started back up because I wanted to see what it tasted like again. Dumb. INSANITY, continuing to do the same thing expecting a different result. New here obviously and soaking it all in while I keep sipping on this beer I've had since 9am and it's 11am now. Hands trembling. My environment is with a large group who drink all the time also, me not drinking with them around seems impossible. 50 yrs old good looking man I've been told my whole life and I'm a drunk. Just sad.

Welcome to Sober Recovery. AA worked before. It can work again. But you have to accept never ever drinking again. No "tastes," no thinking you can drink a little and then you'll get back on the sober bus. You quit and stay quit.

And you can. Believe in yourself.

Welcome to the family. :) I didn't think I could stay sober but I did, with help from this site, and have been happily sober over six years now. :) I hope we can help you get sober too. :)

With that level of alcohol intake daily you may want to consult some professional advice as to what is medically advised for your safe withdrawal.

If you have been to AA you know about the possible symptoms that might require hospitalization.

I used to crack a beer every day when I got up as well. It was a rough week when I quit. I did it though.

Take care.

Was just thinking how bad my environment really is. I live in the South, very close to the beaches. So many functions that drinking is 50% of it. Everybody we are around drinks hard. My closest friend is a retired [also has a heart issue] detective from upstate and he just messaged me what he is doing today all while having a drink. It's 1150am. My wife is an X bartender of 30 years in this town and very very popular. IT is all around me. My wife wants to go out w friends tonight also. It is non stop.
Thanks for the posts, it means the world.
59

If you want to get and stay sober, you are going to have to change up your life, particularly in the beginning. Hard to stay sober in a drinking environment, even harder getting sober in the first place.

If you can't make recovery your priority, can't say "No" to the wife and friends when it comes to putting your sobriety ahead of social obligation, you will really struggle and in all likelihood, continue drinking.

I KNOW, that is even more scary. Bad situation. My health is obviously the most important. I know this obviously. Just need to do it somehow. I almost feel if I quit drinking, I lose everything. Vicious fight in my head. If I keep drinking, I lose everything, it's happened before. I'm a successful guy job wise with the best job and have to do the unthinkable here, in this tropical paradise, otherwise odds are this could all end bad for me.
Thanks

Re-read this and see the contradiction...thats' your addiction talking pure and simple.

What exactly would you "lose" if you quit drinking - other than hangovers, shame, guilt and all the negative consequences? For some people a good exercise is to actually make a list. Get 2 pieces of paper and on one write down all the positive things that drinking achieves for you. Then write down a list of all the things that you would gain if you quit. Then go back and review them - you might be surprised by what you find.

We all think that we are different when we are still in the throes of alcohol. We assume that our situation is somehow worse than others or that we are the victim of circumstances that somehow make us "destined" to keep drinking. It couldn't be farther from the truth though, and you'll find countless stories of people here on SR who have overcome that myth and gotten sober. Each one of us has the power within to make the choice to quit and make a plan to stay quit.

Welcome, '59!

Are you by any chance taking a benzodiazepine?

I was going to suggest the same thing.

Yes. Klonopin .5 mg 3x a day times 5-8 yrs I'd guess.
Last 2 weeks I've weened down to 1 morning, 1 night.
Doctor does not want me on them any longer.

Why do you ask?
Thanks everyone.
59

Welcome 59svg

Thanks Scott.
I not only see the contradiction but understand it clearly now.

I really appreciate this post. I'm certain I have the power and know that by what I right down on the paper will definately be severely 1 sided.

Thank you sir.
59

Welcome to SR, svj! :welcome

You've found a great place for support if you are ready to finally be free of alcohol. Reading and posting here has helped me get and stay sober now for over 8 months. I'm glad you are reaching out- there is a lot of wisdom here.

AA kept you sober before- why not get to a meeting tonight instead of going out? :)

Benzos ( or any drug really ) in combination with alcohol is a very dangerous mix. It's good that you are talking with your doctor about this, is he/she aware of the level of your drinking?

Thank you, I know I'm in the right place.
I cannot get out of this one tonight but can begin by what I consume. Going cold turkey right now is not safe. On the other hand drinking is not safe.
I do understand what I am posting, as you know, this is very hard.
I can do it!
Thanks,
59

Beers yes. A jumbo Jager bottle a week, and consuming it every day, no.
I know the combo is dangerous, yet I've been doing it longer than I can remember. Coming off the Benzo and Alcohol at the same time seems like a very dangerous mix. I'm going to need professional help for sure. I've known this all along since I started on the Jager a few years back.
Whatever is in that stuff is extremely addicting. I know alcohol obviously, but from what I've read, people have no problems drinking it daily in Germany so I just kept doing it. Stop laughing, it's the addiction talking.
:thanks

Welcome to the Forum!! :wave:

Welcome 59svj :)

yeah I thought I would lose everything too by being sober and in a way I did..my old life disappeared...but the one I got in its place is so much better it's not funny.

Black and White to Technicolour. Really living to merely existing.

It's a leap of faith but many of us have made that leap - you'll be ok :)

D

Go back to AA you can do it!!!