Hercules

Well that was what my partner called me last night as I was downing beers and wine, we had a big argument and I decided to pack a suitcase and leave. But I only made it to my car put the suitcase in the boot and then ordered a cab to the local strip club. Iam well known in the place for spending a small fortune on champagne and dancers it's quite pathetic really and the money wasted makes me feel even worse especially since I have not worked properly since i sold my company in 2014 and my savings are going down!I just don't seem to have that motivation to set a new Buisness up I have become lazy, but Iam also thinking the alcohol plays a massive role in this. Anyways back to the strip club and closing time i decide to have a fist fight with another drunk idiot in the middle of the road it was embarrassing as we both probably just looked like we where dancing together in the street. Today I woke with a black eye and a sore head but tbh it does not even faze me as Iam so use to the carnage my destructive drinking has caused over the last 13 years!
Iam considering going back to AA and doing 90/90. Iam just so tired of it all I can honestly see why some people kill themselves over addiction!!

Change4good

You just described many perfect reasons to return to AA. Clearly, things have become unmanageable, and it sounds as if you are both in physical and mental pain.

You can stop the madness. Do it. Thanks for posting, and we are here to support you. You don't have to experience any more black eyes, or diminishing bank accounts!!

ScottFromWI

It's good that you are thinking that. I hope you decide to do something about it before you lose the rest of your savings or worse.

If AA has worked for you in the past your idea to return is a very good one. I hope you decided to follow through with it.

least

I hope the support here and in AA can help you get sober for good.

Delilah1

Sounds like you have a good plan to help you get back on track. Check in later to let us know how it goes today.

MIRecovery

Unfortunately considering getting sober is unlikely to be successful. Getting sober is about what we do not what we think.

There is a wonderful sober life to be had if we are willing to do what is necessary

C23

Put yourself back in the mindset you had when you were building and eventually selling your company. That person is still in there with the drive and perseverance that is needed to beat the booze. We are here for you. Keep posting and make the necessary changes you know needed to be done.

jessie65

Well, you just kept me sober today.

I'm sorry for your troubles. It doesn't have to get any worse though, you can stop now and put down the bottle.

There's help, and this board is a great start.

FreeOwl

exactly.

I've been in very similar states to where you describe yourself. I continued 'considering' for a lot longer than I should have.

In fact, I probably 'considered' getting sober for 10-15 years, two divorces, two DUIs, several arrests, a few affairs, half a million dollars or so wasted and nearly the loss of my children.

Then I finally figured it might be time to do more than 'consider'.

So I CHOSE sobriety. Then that led to EMBRACING sobreity. And that has led to a lot better life.

The life you describe doesn't sound very fulfilling....

Perhaps you might want to reconsider 'considering' and get on with the doing.

Soberwolf

I'm really glad you posted Hercules AA is a good idea so is having a plan which will help keep you on track & keep yourself accountable

If I have one piece of advice it would be if you feel urges or cravings at any time come here & say so no one will judge you & it will keep you sober as we have all been there

Hopefully speak soon Hercules good to hear from you

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html

Hercules

Thanks all for the response Back, yeah it is most defiantly time to start doing more than considering going back to AA.

I have been on this ride way to long and Iam paying the price big time mentally physically and spiritually.

SoberLife90

That sounds terrible. AA would be such a wonderful decision. Tons of support there!

DrakeCKC

I was a fat, alcoholic mess one time as well. I would not say life is perfect but I am 30 lbs lighter, 1014 days sober and at least can deal with what life throws at me with a clear mind.

If AA worked once, try it again. If you need more help than that, check out what is available in your area. Best to you!

Anna

I hope that you make the decision to stop today, Herc.

Do what you need to do to get back on track and live a sober life.

PurpleKnight

Sounds like it's time to finally draw a line under alcohol, it's doing you no favours!!

Write a new chapter to your life, one without alcohol as the lead character, you can do this!!

thomas11

Hercules, if you started, built and sold a company that has allowed you not to work at all for a couple years you must have some drive and discipline hiding inside somewhere. I think you just need to bring it back out to tackle this alcohol issue. I recently sold my company, have a small nest egg from it and if I was actively drinking....oh boy could I find trouble! Instead I'm laying pretty low and doing things to move forward. I hope you can channel your energy towards something more positive. The party doesn't get any better and it will never end as there will always be bars, strip clubs and casino's eager to take you and your money into the toilet. Best wishes to you.

Dropsie

Hercules,

How is to going today?

Hercules

Hi, yes I use to be very very disciplined and focused but it has seemed to left me at the moment as all I feel like Iam doing is battling this addiction.!! When I first got the offer to sell I thought it would be a fresh start but it's turned into a 2 year nightmare of binge drinking And no structure.
It is very true what they say alcoholism is a progressive illness!!

MIRecovery

I would agree it is time to stop considering so what and more importantly when are you going to do it?

We can talk about what we need to do forever but it does not get us any closer to a new life

Hevyn

Hercules, I'm glad to see you. There's no doubt that you can reclaim your life. There's nothing in that lifestyle for you - only misery & regret. I hope you'll give yourself a chance to be happy and free again.