countrygirl2014

Good morning! Write down 3 things you are grateful for today to help keep your brain positive. No "buts"! If all you have is "I am grateful for indoor plumbing" then put that. Today I am grateful I get to go to work. I am grateful for an extra couple bucks in my pocket for coffee. I am grateful for clean clothes.

Jennifer

countrygirl2014

You have a meeting today too, right?

Jennifer

Grendhar

I am going to a meeting this evening. I struggled this morning but was able to talk myself out of stopping to buy beer. Ate some sugary candy like I did yesterday and the edge is taken off the cravings.

Grendhar

Started feeling irritated but taking a nap helped.

Soberwolf

Good job Grendhar have a great meeting later

Berrybean

Great that you went to a meeting. They always make me feel better as a rule. I found it really heard to focus properly when I'd just got sober to read more than a few pages at a time of the BB and LS. I did (and still do) make good use of the speaker recordings that can be accessed free online. I tend to get most of mine from here... 5500+ AA Speakers & Tapes - Organized & Mobile-Friendly! or from Youtube.

If you're feeling like you need an AA top up maybe check them out. Earl Hightower and Sandy Beach are a couple of my favourites - they really make things clear, while being entertaining and 'human' if you know what I mean. (I kind of feel like I know them after listening to so many of their recordings - was very sad to find out that Sandy died a little while back.).

Anyway - sounds like you're doing great. Maybe hang around after your next meeting and help clear up - I found it much easier chatting with others when there was a shared task on the go (less need for eye contact for a start off) and it was just general, friendly chat then, rather than a deep discussion.

Wishing you well for your journey of recovery, through sobriety on to freedom and serenity.

Grendhar

Thank you Soberwolf and Beccy.

I have plans in about an hour to help my father with remodeling in his house and I'll be staying there until it is time to go to the meeting. I always feel positive after a meeting so I think I can safely predict a successful day 3.

Grendhar

Went to the meeting. Became irritated again about a half hour before the meeting .. didn't want to go but did anyway. Didn't feel like I got anything out of that particular meeting. Still was irritated after the meeting and thought about drinking but I don't want to wake up tomorrow on day 1.. as much as I'd love that temporary peace beer brings me .. it's got to end at some point because the negatives far outweigh the positives.

Anyway .. day 3 complete. Water purchased instead of beer.

SoberinSyracuse

You speak with such honesty and you have a lot of insight. Hang on to your license if you can, and don't let alcohol steal your relationship with your girlfriend. These things have great value. Don't let alcohol take them away.

And as for job loss... You can turn this event into the best thing that ever happened IF you kick alcohol to the curb. If you're sober, you can use your energy and health to envision a dream job and then go after it. But you'll miss opportunities if you're a drinker.

You can do this. I've quit for a month in the past and I can guarantee you it gets better. Pretty soon after you quit, you feel so much better on every level! But....make sure you have a plan for how to manage the sudden, overwhelming craving that can pop up weeks or months into sobriety. You need a sobriety plan that will ensure you don't drink no matter where you are, who you see, or what happens.

Upward2Enlightenment

Good job not giving in to the AV. Water is SO much better for you than beer.

Grendhar

Slept a little longer than usual .. day 4 started about 15 minutes ago. Just been sitting here drinking coffee.

biminiblue

Sleeping when you can is great in early days. I treated myself like I was recovering from a serious illness - because I was.

Well done on working through that discontent last night. That's the key to recovery, finding ways to live peacefully and with gratitude without numbing out the moments of discomfort. Every emotion will pass.

juppe

I remember the feelings of irritation and anger during the first couple of weeks after quitting. Once I started to realize I was going through alcohol withdrawls the feelings became more manageable. Suddenly there was a reason and a name for what I was going through! Those feelings will pass and your sleeping schedule will normalize then you'll wonder why the heck you didn't quit earlier!

PurpleKnight

You can do it Grendhar!!

Grendhar

Hi.

I'll just use this thread instead of making another one. I didn't make it past day 4. I had this weird feeling .. this feeling of irritation beyond what I had described in previous posts and I didn't even try to stop myself from buying beer.

I've finished another day 1.. no drinks today. Concerned about tomorrow..

Grendhar

Day 2 again.

Soberwolf

Congrats on day 2 have you got a plan Grendhar

PurpleKnight

You can do this Grendhar, tweak your plan, maybe some more support and you'll get there!!

Grendhar

Hi Soberwolf and Purpleknight.

Thanks for posting.

What I've noticed is when I go to an evening A.A meeting, I usually don't want to drink that evening. I have also noticed if I keep busy, I tend to not think about drinking. It's in the moments that I am home alone and in a negative mood, I decide to drink and "enjoy myself".

I didn't sleep well last night and decided to finally read the Living Sober book I have .. it mentioned that it is hard to just sit around and try to "not drink". The book says it is better to replace the drinking with something more healthy .. my plan at the moment is to try to replace it with things that occupy my mind.

Other than that ... I just don't know .. I'm going to use today to help mentally prepare myself for tomorrow.