MikeM

I've been a member here a few times under different usernames. Btw, quick note to the admins: I'd like to keep this one instead of having it merged with an old one. The reason is that I have disconnected from my old self. I'm starting fresh and a new username is part of that for me.

I've had so much trouble quitting. For so long. Usually I would join here, stay sober for a short while, relapse, throw my login details in the trash. Giving up. This happened a few times.

But I'm back. You may wonder, why do I think it will be different this time? That's because I had a huge breakthrough last year.

See, I decided to quit again November 20th. And much to my surprise, I managed to stay sober. Until New Year's Eve... A little champagne and a week long binge followed.

But... I did have more than 1 month and 1 week sober before it. And that was the breakthrough. That had been impossible for me in my previous attempts.

With that experience, I'm starting over. Now I know I can stay sober for at least that long. And if I hadn't taken the champagne the desire for alcohol hadn't been triggered. I would still have been sober.

So, lesson learned. I know now that I will get to a point where I can live without alcohol and I need to avoid it completely. Not even one sip. For the rest of my life. And I think I can do that.

A new day 1, and I expect it to be the last time!

ALinNS

Welcome back.

I am just curious were you following a plan of some sort to stay sober? Was that one glass your trigger? It would be in my case, I would disappear for a month very often, crazy way to live.

Wishing you the very best, I had a relapse in Nov as I had put the plan on a shelf and my girlfriend was away, working crazy long hours and bang it happened, I have managed to work my plan with some additions and stay sober since Dec 12th but what a terrible experience this last binge was.

Mountainmanbob

Good luck day one is better than day 0.

MB

MikeM

Hi ALinNS. Thanks. I know the feeling of how terrible a binge is. When I got sober in November I literally couldn't drink anymore. I was such a wreck and my body was hurting so bad, I could barely function anymore. And I realized that it needed to stop. I didn't have a plan, which is why it surprised me that I actually stayed sober.

Until that one drink... It was the mistake. I had gotten over even thinking about drinking. Today I woke up after the binge and saw that if I want to survive, I should quit again. I refuse to get to that horrible place ever again.

least

Welcome back! Glad you're recommitting to sobriety. Hope you are successful this time.

Steely

Relapsed many times but this time is different for me too. I know that I have run out of options,rationalisations, surly'don't cares' and delusions of grandeur in that I am somehow different. Who knows what the morrow may bring but for today I love waking up sober and the improvement in my clarity of thinking and relations with others, confidence, etc. I smile more now and people smile back. All would be lost for the want of a lousy drink. I wish you all that you wish for yourself...sobriety. No drink makes me happy any longer (long gone) but sobriety does.

PurpleKnight

Welcome back Mike!!

Surrender2win

Welcome back!

Soberwolf

Welcome MikeM

Delilah1

Welcome Mike!! I won't say welcome back, since you are starting anew. I am on Day 9 after being on and off SR as well. I will stick with you on sobriety!! Cheers to a sober 2016!:-)

SoberinSyracuse

Hi, Mike. I'm on my third try. And I feel much more confident this time because I also had some realizations. I know this monster better, and know how important it is to have a plan.

This is going to be our smartest try, and God willing the one that sticks!! Put that plan together to trigger-proof your sobriety.

Jsbodhi

Hi! Welcome back! It'll stick this time if you keep at it!
Xoxo