This Time Last Year
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Down Under
Posts: 400
This Time Last Year
Hi Everyone
Yesterday was my 57th Birthday, I've now been drinking for 30 years. Had my drinking binges over the years but never totally out of control like the last 5 years after a legal battle with business partners. I won that battle but during the battle period I was calculating my tactics day and night, not sleeping and drinking hard.
A couple years ago, I saw a doctor and physiologist, tried AA but non of this made a long term difference. Then this time last year I discovered SR ... what a great site!
I joined the January Class 2015. From the first day I discovered I had no urges, little if no urges for the next 52 days. Then I thought I had this under control and had a drink. First time I've heard of the 'Pink Cloud'. I felt disappointed in letting my classmates down and instead of picking myself up I plunged into the depths of hell again.
So it brings me to yesterday, I was drinking the day before, but like a switch that was turned on I have no urge to drink and neither today. I have no idea why this is so. Went out to dinner for my birthday and my wife asked if I was taking a bottle of wine and I said "No" and she chose not to drink as well.
Like a lion creeping in the long Savannah grasslands, I know AV is lying low and will inevitably pounce on me when I least expect.
During the last 12 months I have been the designated driver, gone to parties, camping and boys weekends away and not drink but as soon as I get home it's a different story.
I have yet to figure out what the trigger is. My family is great. The physiologist believes I'm bored and need a change with a challenge.
I've gathered so much information from SR members to be ready to beat AV when he comes visiting. I'll be spending more time on SR.
Hence my previous Thread as to the whys and whats of Mindfullness.
I have so many good reasons to be sober forever.
Let it be a good year for all of us.
JS
Yesterday was my 57th Birthday, I've now been drinking for 30 years. Had my drinking binges over the years but never totally out of control like the last 5 years after a legal battle with business partners. I won that battle but during the battle period I was calculating my tactics day and night, not sleeping and drinking hard.
A couple years ago, I saw a doctor and physiologist, tried AA but non of this made a long term difference. Then this time last year I discovered SR ... what a great site!
I joined the January Class 2015. From the first day I discovered I had no urges, little if no urges for the next 52 days. Then I thought I had this under control and had a drink. First time I've heard of the 'Pink Cloud'. I felt disappointed in letting my classmates down and instead of picking myself up I plunged into the depths of hell again.
So it brings me to yesterday, I was drinking the day before, but like a switch that was turned on I have no urge to drink and neither today. I have no idea why this is so. Went out to dinner for my birthday and my wife asked if I was taking a bottle of wine and I said "No" and she chose not to drink as well.
Like a lion creeping in the long Savannah grasslands, I know AV is lying low and will inevitably pounce on me when I least expect.
During the last 12 months I have been the designated driver, gone to parties, camping and boys weekends away and not drink but as soon as I get home it's a different story.
I have yet to figure out what the trigger is. My family is great. The physiologist believes I'm bored and need a change with a challenge.
I've gathered so much information from SR members to be ready to beat AV when he comes visiting. I'll be spending more time on SR.
Hence my previous Thread as to the whys and whats of Mindfullness.
I have so many good reasons to be sober forever.
Let it be a good year for all of us.
JS
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 1,130
Two days ago you were drinking. You also say that drinking brought you to the depths of hell last year. Many of us can think of hellish experiences relating to drink.
A lot of your post is about whether or not you have an "urge" to drink. If you have a background of alcohol addiction, this urge will be powerful and unpredictable.
What you need is a sophisticated plan to prevent yourself drinking even if the urge strikes. For example, don't sit next to your wife while she drinks a bottle a wine one day after you come off drinking.
Everyone's plan is different but the successful ones tend to include a lot of face-to-face interaction with other people in recovery so that you can help each other. Good plans are also about creating a life that is full of rewarding activities that are not connected with alcohol. And as I'm sure you know from AA, "staying away from that first drink" especially now at only two days sober.
A lot of your post is about whether or not you have an "urge" to drink. If you have a background of alcohol addiction, this urge will be powerful and unpredictable.
What you need is a sophisticated plan to prevent yourself drinking even if the urge strikes. For example, don't sit next to your wife while she drinks a bottle a wine one day after you come off drinking.
Everyone's plan is different but the successful ones tend to include a lot of face-to-face interaction with other people in recovery so that you can help each other. Good plans are also about creating a life that is full of rewarding activities that are not connected with alcohol. And as I'm sure you know from AA, "staying away from that first drink" especially now at only two days sober.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hi James
Happy Birthday
Y'know sometimes I think there really is no trigger... alcoholism doesn't really need a reason - but we can often make one up to fit.
If the problem now is exclusively drinking at home, have you considered making your home a 'dry zone' at all?
It won;t stop the cravings but it puts and extra degree of difficulty between feeling the itch and scratching it?
D
Happy Birthday
Y'know sometimes I think there really is no trigger... alcoholism doesn't really need a reason - but we can often make one up to fit.
If the problem now is exclusively drinking at home, have you considered making your home a 'dry zone' at all?
It won;t stop the cravings but it puts and extra degree of difficulty between feeling the itch and scratching it?
D
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
That's where things like urge surfing and posting here instead of heading down the road come into play JS.
In time, you won't always need to log in here, but why not use the site when you need it most?
D
In time, you won't always need to log in here, but why not use the site when you need it most?
D
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
It's really a different decision tho. Checking in here instead of going to the bottlo. Checking in here instead of craving your head off.
Checking in here daily is great but it's not like Colgate - there's no 24 hour ring of confidence that protects you until you log in again....
Use us when you need us.
If you need to excuse yourself at home or work or wherever to do that, do it.
Making different decisions, and desiring different outcomes requires a little effort
D
Checking in here daily is great but it's not like Colgate - there's no 24 hour ring of confidence that protects you until you log in again....
Use us when you need us.
If you need to excuse yourself at home or work or wherever to do that, do it.
Making different decisions, and desiring different outcomes requires a little effort
D
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