Change is possible! Weekender Jan 8th
 

My addictions put me on a path. They changed my world from innocence and naïveté to a gritty version of hope.

I once thought that if I only changed where I lived I could change my desire and thirst for drugs and drinking. Getting high.

I have come to accept that my addictions are where I am and nowhere else.

I am not saying that a change of venue does not lend a role in recovery. It can and did for me. What I am trying to highlight is a deep lesson I learned here on SR.

There is no change too big or too small when it comes to our addictions. There is no single thing I did to help myself. It was the accumulation of actions, lessons, thoughts, leaving friends and finding new ones, leaving where I lived and resettling... along with desire, fear, and self love that made change something real.

What that translates into is "Keep trying!"

I think every person's own sober formula is personal. As unique as each of us.

I can tell you I stopped trying to change my addictions. They aren't going to change. So I changed everything around them and left them bare and alone. They still travel with me but not me with them.

Change is possible. Share this weekend what changes you made in recovery. What lengths have you gone to save yourself?

Ken

Welcome to your sober weekend!!

:bus:bus:bus:bus:bus

Congrats on shotgun, Lunar!

I am in)

M a n f l u ! :(:(:(

koff... koff... I will survive! (I hope)

I need to drag into work for a few hours then home and calling out tomorrow. My brothers visit is to important.

K

Congrats Lunar! I saw everyone's name down below and thought this should be good! :)

Take good care of that manflu, Ken!

Thanks! And the lottery here has hit $675,000,000. This is going to be crazy times until next drawing on Saturday. Bet it gets too $800,000,000 for sure!

I buy 1 ticket. That's all it takes so why spend more.

My people will start the weekender for me when I win. And I will fly each of you to maine for a personal weekender. :D:D:D:D:D

Deal!

Ok, now I'm awake.

Don't believe Ken when he says he'll start a Weekender thread later... :whoop

Ken, so exciting about your brother visiting, I hope it goes very well and I hope you feel better soon! You need to rest and drink a lot hot tea with lemon. I also recommend my new obsession - fresh ground ginger. I swear it cures everything and if it doesn't I don't want to know because it still does because I believe it does. :blah

lunar, congrats on the shotgun!

I'm in.

Cheers Ken, great post and food for thought as always.

Personally the biggest and most important change was finally accepting there was a problem.

Only in early sobriety but this is a keeper of that I am certain - changes I made initially were seeking the relevant help off my own back because I genuinely wanted & needed too / plenty of reading and listening to others experiences / sticking close to SR / attending sessions & appointments / distancing myself from drinking & drugging friends / cancelling all planned trips and parties .

I've also been working hard at showing I am serious about this with those closest to me & trying my best to mend my marriage thro my mistakes / listening more and not being so judgmental / - channelling my obsessions into more productive areas and practising an all round healthy lifestyle / eating & exercise - also looking for new interests and hobbies.

Trying to be an all round better person .

One thing is for sure this place has been a fantastic help.

Hopping aboard!!!

Change is indeed possible, as I witness every day in this thread and on this site.

Over the Christmas, a family member proclaimed to me:
"You can never drink again"

A simple refrain, the new constant.

B

In my case, I knew for years there was a problem. And I tried to mitigate it for years. What finally prompted a life-altering decision was admitting I will never be able to moderate alcohol. Never. So "I will never drink again and I will never change my mind". That was my mantra in the early days. This forum and all your stories and support helped tremendously. Thank you, SR. :tyou

I'm in :)

Hope you feel better Ken! I second lemon and ginger.

I'm in! Will have coffee and think about the topic.

Here and raising my cup of coffee to all of you :)

My problem was I just thought it was everyone else's problem - if they didn't like it or like me then tough - deal with it, I was having a great time and to hell with the consequences or what anyone else thought of me, I thought I was invincible and believed my own bullsh1t. Far too many instances now that I look back where I should have sat up and taken notice, it was mentioned many times but never accepted, I guess until you do it's a pointless exercise for those around you.

In hindsight the last episode / binge whilst far from acceptable on so many levels I'm relieved it happened as it was the wake up call I really needed, something clicked and made me realise what an idiot I was in the out of control states I was continually getting in, not to mention the amounts consumed - just never considered the dangers or long term effects until the lights came on.

The question of moderation was and never can be an option - it just wont ever happen, that's why finding SR was so crucial for me, it was this place that put that to bed for me instantly - grateful for that as without it I reckon the door would have been left open for many further problems.

Yep. This was it for me, exactly. I was so afraid of the change I knew I had to make. My entire social lifevinvolved alcohol. All of my friends drink. My family drinks. The town I live in is all about socializing at the tavern. I thought I'd lose all of my friends and be completely alone and miserable. But I got to a point where I knew I had to make the change, regardless of those possibilities. Or I'd kill myself eventually. I'd die in a car crash, die just from drinking, or kill myself.

Has this much change been easy? No. Has it been fun? Not much. Did it result in all of the things I was afraid of? NO! I still have friends. I still socialize. I'm not all alone and miserable.

I'm still working on changes. I want to meet some new sober friends. I want to get out and do more fun activities that don't involve any drinking, by anyone. I want to have adventures. I want to get a job. I want to get out of debt. I want to feel more comfortable in my own skin. I want to stop feeling bad about the past. It's a lot. Is it too much? Hello no. In sobriety, these changes are not only possible, they are already happening.

I know a lot of you don't do AA, but my very favorite thing in the Big Book is the Promises. Google it. If you never read another word of the big book, this is worth reading. It's a hopeful message, and something I go back to often.

Climbing aboard!!!
:)

Vacation!!!!!!!!!
Cannot wait!
;)