New and in need of kindness and support.
 

Today was a huge struggle after being on a disastrous binge drinking session that left me feeling utterly ashamed and hopeless. I relapsed after some months of continuous sobriety last year on Easter Sunday and had been spiraling downwards for the past 9 months. I burned too many bridges and my disorderly behavior has exhausted whatever kindness my friends may have felt for me. Concern has turned into annoyance. I really don't have anyone to really talk to about this that can understand and relate.

Today, after marinating in shame and regret I realized this is my chance and invitation to finally make a change and recommit fully to sobriety. This could be my rock bottom that I've been waiting for. The one that finally propels me to get cleaned up and back on the path that my Spiritual nature yearns to walk.

But I need your help. It's certainly easy for me right now to want to recommit to sobriety because I am still freshly feeling the repercussions of my alcohol abuse. I want to hold myself accountable when the pain subsides. I need support and encouragement and other people to help me keep myself accountable.

Slowly, I begin to feel a spark of hope. There's nothing left for me in the party world and the endless oceans of vodka and back and forth mood swings of depression and shame. I hope this is my chance and this is the time I finally overcome the prison of my addiction once in for all.

Thank you for listening and I wish you well on your path as well! Good luck.

Empath welcome. I am in a similar position to you.
Keep posting and reading here, and if you find your motivation waning come on twice as much. We help ourselves by helping each other.

It sounds like it is time to dump out all of that poison and start reclaiming your life. You know it is hard but is just something you have to do. There is lots of support here!

Welcome Empath :)

This community really helped me get out of that cycle where I'd feel better and forget about the anguish...and then drink again.

I know we can help you too :)

D

Beautifully written, Empath. Welcome to SR.

I felt the same when I came stumbling in here. I was thoroughly disgusted with myself & my actions. I was becoming reckless and putting myself in dangerous situations. Everyone was noticing how my behavior had changed. I was becoming a person I didn't recognize. Almost 8 yrs. later - there's just never been anything worth risking my sobriety over. We're glad you're here. You can get free.

Empathy
 

Welcome, Empath! It's good that you are once again seeking and yearning for that Path; the Higher one. You will get back on it, I have confidence. You CAN BE restored and you will be found walking it again, much to your relief and to the relief of your loved ones.

I' m very thankful for memories that can take us back to a better place and time. And, I'm thankful for the memories that remind me of what I need to overcome.

"Take me home, country roads...." -John Denver

Hi, Empath. I'm also starting the journey after a relapse. As are lots of others here. Let's band together and win this battle.

I'm in. Are you?

I am very grateful for everyone's kindness and outpouring of support. It makes such a huge difference! I've been isolated for so long I forgot how good it is to interact with others on an authentic sober level.

SoberinSyracuse, yes! I am in. :c011:

Welcome Empath. You will get support and kindness here. I'm only 13 days sober and understand that early days are full of hope and enthusiasm, I think AA calls it the honeymoon period after which we have to LIVE sober. That is when we will need the support. Stay posted and glad you're in.

Hi Empath and welcome! We are happy to have you here.

Welcome to the family. :) I'm glad you joined us. :)

You can do it. I dragged myself out of the vodka whirlpool. Twice. And regardless pf how many bridges you think that you have burned, there are still people on this planet that will gladly offer a helping hand if you are honestly working on your recovery.

Welcome Empath

Welcome Empath!

Welcome to the Forum Empath!! :wave:

Welcome!

You are not alonel