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Not so happy new year

Old 01-01-2016, 04:49 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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When I was given anti anxiety meds for withdrawal (benzos) it was only for a few days, just for the acute withdrawal and not long enough to become addicted to them.

If your w/d is bad, get medical help. Alcohol w/d can be dangerous. Have someone there with you.
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Old 01-01-2016, 04:58 PM
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Interesting thing that using/abusing substances to deal with anxiety can actually produce more anxiety. And, anxiety is often caused by fear.

So, whenever I feel anxious I'm tryimg not to run away from that feeling, but ask myself: "What's got me feeling so anxious? What am I afraid of?" And...be prepared to truly DEAL with the answers to those questions.

Also, withdrawing from an addictive substance can produce anxiety. It's one of the hallmarks and one of the first signs a person might show: anxious, on edge, etc. (because they didn't get their fix)...
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Old 01-01-2016, 05:30 PM
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I know I need to be strong and look anxiety in the face instead of running from it. And swapping one addiction for another is not something I should be even playing with.
It's a vicious cycle and I need to fight it. I've done it before I can do it again.
I'm just scared. I don't even know who I am anymore.
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Old 01-01-2016, 05:39 PM
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Originally Posted by Kuebiko View Post
Hi Shantilove, you are not alone, also relapsed after a few months sober; I binged NYE. Today is the 2nd Jan where I am, and I feel 80% better than yesterday when hungover. I still feel ashamed and have a head-ache, feel a bit anxious, but am more able to put one foot in front of the other and carry on today. To my mind, our brains have been 'trained' to want alcohol by our over use of it and it is always going to be my weakness. I have to try harder. I became resentful and felt entitled to drink. I felt obliged to go to a NYE event even though I didn't really want to go. The reason I went is because I wanted to support my BF as he was hosting his own party at his flat. I wanted to be a good girlfriend. But I went and it started out OK but like always with alcohol, plummeted into embarrassment, sickness, shame and despair...
Next time I will apologise and simply not go along to some of these social things, because I am not strong enough, at the end of a busy year and in the heat to summer, to not drink in that environment. Shantilove I hope I have not hijacked your post but want to say ~ this is my first post - you won't drink today and neither will I. You can tick the calendar at the end of the day to record the fact you didn't drink and so will I.
Thank you so much. It feels good to know I'm not alone and there are people who can relate to me.
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Old 01-01-2016, 05:50 PM
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In my own experience the anxiety will get better. For a long time I was finding a softer, easier way to live my life, and I did that by drinkinking alcohol and taking drugs. I never lived life on life terms. As time passes you will better be able to live life. Start the new year off right! You can do it!
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Old 01-01-2016, 05:57 PM
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hi Shantylove , I suffered terribly with anxiety when I stopped drinking. I did see the dice for anti anxiety pills which helped, but the best thing was the further away I was from drinking the anxiety passed.
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Old 01-01-2016, 06:02 PM
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My anxiety is crippling. I'm paranoid and shaking and my AV just keeps saying just one drink one drink will take the edge off and I know it does, but it's that 10th drink that keeps the anxiety pumping. Time goes by so slowly.
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Old 01-01-2016, 06:03 PM
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Welcome to you too Kuebiko

D
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Old 01-01-2016, 06:05 PM
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Originally Posted by Shantilove View Post
My anxiety is crippling. I'm paranoid and shaking and my AV just keeps saying just one drink one drink will take the edge off and I know it does, but it's that 10th drink that keeps the anxiety pumping. Time goes by so slowly.
You can stay sober today - no matter how bad the anxiety gets...so stay sober today...get up tomorrow and repeat as necessary

Assuming your anxiety isn't of long standing, every day you make a sober one is a day where your anxiety should abate a little more.
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Old 01-01-2016, 06:11 PM
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The anxiety will go away with more sober time, but you can't have "just one to take the edge off".
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Old 01-01-2016, 06:56 PM
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Originally Posted by Shantilove View Post
I know I need to be strong and look anxiety in the face instead of running from it.

I'm just scared. I don't even know who I am anymore.
I guess you could think of as "needing to be strong", but that kind of thinking could be part of the problem. I can only speak from my own experience:I could do a lot on my own strength and fortitude; my own will power...but there came a point in which my own strength just wasn't cuttin' it. I needed to admit how weak I really and truly was. I don't know that it was STRENGTH so much that helped me face my fears/anxiety as it was to stop FIGHTING -to disarm myself. I've come to REALIZE with a bit of sober time that my alcohol use/abuse had become a part of my "arsenal" of weapons I had stored up over the years and it was not a very good weapon. Hang in there. We are rootin' for ya!
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Old 01-01-2016, 07:31 PM
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Hi Shantilove, I understand wanting to "take the edge off", it sounds very appealing at the time, but as you know it's just an illusion. It only sharpens the edge when the illusion is gone. You can do this. Chalk the relapse up to a life lesson. You don't want to start back down that dark path.
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Old 01-01-2016, 09:49 PM
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I had crippling anxiety when I was going through withdrawal. Having drinks one through ten to take the edge off only ensured that the anxiety would only come roaring back with s vengeance once the booze wore off. A week or two after I quit completely the anxiety suddenly vanished. But only after I had continual consecutive days of sobriety. Sneaking in a drink here and there, as I'd done in the past, only prolonged the agony.

Stick with it and see your doctor if you're still not comfortable. When I finally quit I got a benzo prescription, limited in number, to help. But I was completely honest with my doctor about my alcohol intake and my desire to quit.
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Old 01-02-2016, 07:37 AM
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If you can get to an urgent care facility, explain to a doctor honestly about what's going on...they can give you something to help you safely detox for a few days (as long you have someone else around to monitor). That way you can sleep it off over the weekend. You don't have to suffer through withdrawal
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Old 01-02-2016, 03:26 PM
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Hi Shantilove, How is it all going? Do you feel a little less anxious? I am having a particularly hard time myself of feeling beaten and - hating myself. Saying 'I hate myself' in my mind and out loud as well. I said things when I was drunk :,( which were just ridiculous to say the least. I hope you are feeling less anxious and also positive about the future. I think our brain chemistry just needs a few days to come good.
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Old 01-02-2016, 03:44 PM
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I haven't slept, my husband just cane home in a drunekn rage which I must forgive because he always forgives me. I guess I pushed him to this point.
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Old 01-02-2016, 04:01 PM
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It would be nice if you could go to the Dr and get some sleep help, do you think? Maybe you can both start fresh now, he can abstain with you. My boyfriend has decided to join me in 100% abstinence after NYE. He has not got the problem I have but is sick enough of alcohol and its effects on him, his friends and me, to quit.
I get what you mean about reciprocating forgiveness. Do you think he will feel sorry?
I slept but I did get help from my 'sleepy antihistamine' tablet, which I cut in half. My brain still feels a bit shattered, but its the psychological and emotional battering that is the hardest.
I hope your husband and you have time to relax and watch a movie or go for a walk later. I will be taking my BF and son on a walk later today (Sunday 3rd)
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Old 01-02-2016, 04:04 PM
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This does not sound good! Are you safe? Is there anyway you can leave or get away from your husband until he settles down? I understand the forgiveness part, but you don't need to be held hostage to it, if you know what I mean.
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Old 01-02-2016, 04:15 PM
  # 39 (permalink)  
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When I'm drinking, the anxiety is unbearable. After 3 or 4 days sober, it gets bearable. After a few weeks, I felt pretty good in that department.

I don't recommend drinking to address the anxiety because I'm pretty sure it's what's causing it in the first place.
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Old 01-02-2016, 07:54 PM
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Anxiety is very hard, its a vicious circle.

Some anti depressants are said to be good for anxiety as well without being addictive, not that I am trying to give medical advice.

Yoga helps my anxiety a lot, and I recently started learning mindfulness which helps also. Plus exercise is a godsend for me, on days I manage to get to the gym. Unfortunately it can be very hard for me to choose the healthy coping strategies over the unhealthy....

There are a lot of beautiful mindfulness meditations on you tube, and I tried something called loving compassion mindfulness which was really really soothing and calming.

Goodluck, and keep believing you can do it.

Apparently our brains believe what we tell it.
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