This AV (Addictive Voice)
 

Is a piece of work in my case at least, it will try everything to get me to drink or to not do something that will hurt it but my head has been clear since the 12th and it has little to no power over me, for now and I hope and pray never again.

So this morning alcohol is the far from my mind because my mind is clear however we have had two big snow storms over the past week, roads are in poor condition and I have my weekly meeting with a Clinical Therapist, Addiction Services at 9, it's about a 20 min drive, so the AV has been trying everything this morning to tell me, Andrew the roads are bad, reschedule for another time, you know Peter and he will understand. I say BS, I am going to my appointment.

Point being is in my case I have to be very mindful of where these thoughts are coming from, my logical side of my brain knows I will be fine, go slower, take longer, you have never had a problem or accident in 35 years so what is the problem Andrew?

This AV will go to any extreme to try and get us to do many things, miss an appointment, meeting, work, drink, family gathering whatever the case may be, I know for me when I listened and missed that meeting in the past it always led to a road of self destruction.

Just wanted to share.

Have a great one
Andrew

Hi Andrew,
Like I said to someone else today, don't give the AV too much power.

this is how I see it: it's a visceral desire, not a highly developed creature of intellect.

'It' isn't really an It but it's easier to frame things this way - It needs our legs to go get the booze and our arms to carry the booze, and our mouths to open to pour the booze into.

You have the consciousness of the higher brain and abstract thought - you can absolutely refuse to cooperate at any point from the initial thought on.

Your AV may not like it and it may throw a tantrum, but like any toddler it will wear itself out.

The more you disengage from the AV - the more you refuse to enter into any kind of dialogue - the stronger you will get.

D

Excellent post & reply D can't really add to it

I ignore my AV, as I understand it.

Great Job Andy! :You_Rock_

That's it. Once you recognise and name it the job is done. It's when you identify with it that it gets tricky.

I just wrote about this. I recognize the AV is doing the scheming, but I am the one that has the intellect to take care of the logistics including the rationalizations. Well, I'm the grown-up here, so too bad for that sorry addiction that can't do anything but want.

Great job on pushing through Andrew!! :scoregood

The roads for the most part were fine as I suspected. As I mentioned this AV at least with me will go to any extreme to win even a small battle, I know the weather I have driven in to get booze, go to whatever length, today was a cake walk.

As my counselor said it quiets down in time however we always have to be mindful that it is probably up to something or planning something. Especially in the early stages as long as we are mindful, play the tape through (which I did as the 2nd meeting is always easier to miss than the first, everything starts to fall apart and falling apart is not in my big plan.

Had an excellent session, did some shopping on the way home and feel at peace I won this battle and plan to win every battle so that it never again destroys what I am working desperate hard at putting back together.

Happy New Year everyone, my former better half that I still think the world of and I am fairly confident we will get back together is coming this afternoon from the city (1 hours drive) we are going to take the dogs for a long walk and then because we both love to cook as a hobby, we are cooking some dishes we have been chatting about from scratch, watch a fun movie and bring in the new year on a very positive note, me being sober and I am so thankful for my sobriety and this opportunity, also thankful for everyone of you here, I am of the mind working together nothing can stop us, we just can't do it alone in the early stages especially.

All the best

Andrew