3 Weeks Sober Today But Concerned
 

New user and first-time poster on the forums.

I am in my mid/late 20's and I quit drinking 3 weeks ago to the day because I had become concerned about my health. I noticed on the rules here we aren't allowed to ask questions related to medical issues, so I'll just skip that here.

I didn't join a 12-step program, or AA etc. when I quit. Not because I have anything against it (in fact I think it's a great idea). But because at the time it just didn't cross my mind. I was so concerned with my health that I just dropped it out of fear. I had been a heavy daily drinker for about 3-4 years.

So far it hasn't been quite as bad as I initially thought it would be. I'm definitely grateful about that. The hardest thing so far has been turning down offers to go out with friends, go on trips etc. where I know there will be alcohol involved. But once that initial moment/craving to join them passes I feel better again.

But now I'm curious what changes I should be making next. I've started a healthy diet, slowly am introducing exercise into my life, and making a conscious effort to spend more time with friends who don't drink as well.

Any advice from people who have been through the early stages/looking into the next full year about things I can start doing/stop doing to keep myself on track?

Much appreciated!

Welcome to the site. :) It helps if you have a recovery plan. What will you do in a moment of weakness? For me, I saw a counselor and made daily visits to SR. It's been keeping me sober for six years now. I hope the support here can help you get sober for good. :hug:

Hey congrats on 3 weeks, i am on 38 days ( but previously quit for 2 years) i was thinking what triggered me falling off the wagon and think it was me thinking i could control the amounts and of course within weeks i was drinking too much again. I am determined not to fall off the wagon this time, i think this group is helping alot, reading stories of shame and guilt has really made me remember why i stopped the first time around. I think the main thing is when you get bored, and you will ! Make sure you have something to do which either completely knackers you out or takes you away from any sutuation that may lead to drinking. My exercise of choice is running, normally with a group of likeminded people, by the time you get back the last thing i want to do is put poison in a clean system. Good Luck, keep strong.:c011:

Congratulations on 3 weeks! I think having a plan, even if it isn't a structured plan like AA, can definitely help. Weak moments can come at any time, and it's better to be prepared. Welcome!

It's cool that so far everyone mentioned exactly what I've been thinking could lead to future pitfalls: moments of weakness and the illusion that being away from it could somehow let me come back to it and "control" it again.

I think for sure those are both things I should have a plan for now and not wait for it to happen to figure something out.

My coping skills definitely need work. Every time in the past I would use alcohol to escape a situation I would always wake up and feel ridiculous because the problem was still there that made me want to drink in the first place.

I'm so happy for you to be kicking this nasty habit early in life, and you see that just quitting is only half the job. :c011: The other half is building a rich, fulfilling, sober life.

Sounds like you're doing the right things. Do you have hobbies/interests? I lost mine because drinking starved them out. No time for them, 'ya know. A great nondrinking hobby is ballroom, Latin, or swing dance. It's very active, very social, and takes a ton of coordination so it doesn't really mix with booze.

How about joining a group or club? You mention not wanting to attend a group like AA. I get that. How about joining a group where the focus isn't about drinking/recovery, but their interests would just naturally preclude alcohol? Like a Cross Fit club, or a peak performance club, or getting involved with a church?

Keep going with what you're doing! You've got this!

You sound like me (and I'm sure a lot of us). I got no where drinking to escape my problems, except still facing my problems while hungover. No good!

Welcome nice to meet you

I feel thankful that I've decided to move away from alcohol in my 20's as well! But honestly I'm so spooked by whatever damage I've already done to my body, that I'm still a bit anxious about it all.

I actually wasn't saying I'm against AA or anything like that, but more that when I quit it was just such an internal decision I didn't think of it at the time. I think I'd be open to checking it out :) I think joining a new club etc, and pursuing my hobbies/career more right now is exactly what I want to be doing! Great ideas.

Yeah when I really stopped and thought about it I realized drinking was getting me absolutely nothing. A temporary escape at best. Some people say your dating life in your 20's suffers when you quit drinking. But in my experience even with alcohol my luck there has been rotten anyway LOL! I don't think it adds anything of true substance to our lives.

Funny thing is even though only 3 weeks has passed, I don't even really miss it the way I thought I would right before I quit.

Dating and Alcohol
 

That's awesome that you don't seem to be having a tough withdrawal! This lets you focus on the good stuff you're working on now.

LOL, I hear you about dating!! The thing about alcohol and dating.... This is from my perspective in my late 40s... Earlier in life, it seemed to be a great lubricant for my love life. But in retrospect I know that it made me "settle" for men who were less than what I wanted. Instead of using those years to discover who I truly was and what I valued in a partner, I flitted from one high-risk encounter to the next, with a few tumultuous and dysfunctional "relationships" in between. This was a waste of time, and I think it's the reason my two marriages failed -- because I married men I would not have accepted if I'd been sober. Those years should have instead been spent finding the right person and building a wonderful relationship with them.

I think all alcohol does really is infuse us with a false sense of confidence, lower our standards, and waste our time in low-value dating.

And for what it's worth.... at this point in life the men who have the attributes I like are all nondrinkers. Hahaha, just one more reason for me to quit!

Welcome to the Forum Materiafanatic!! 3 Weeks is fantastic!! :wave: