Hi Everyone - I'm New
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Florida
Posts: 50
Hi Everyone - I'm New
Hey everyone. I'm new here. I am an alcoholic.
I'm 30, married, 2 little boys, successful insurance agent, own my home, etc. On the surface things are dandy. I used to binge drink every night. At least 10-15 shots per night of whiskey. Every night. For the past 10 years. The only sober time I had in those 10 years (more than a day or two) was when I was pregnant both times. That's one heck of a problem.
I'm on day 2. Feeling fine. I have always used drinking to deal with my depression and anxiety, which is funny because the rebound depression and anxiety after a bad night of drinking was unimaginable. I have more of a psychological dependence, less of a physical dependence. No shakes, dizziness, nausea, or pains. Just the nagging voice telling me I "need" to drink or else I'll.... do what? Nothing, exactly.
I'm on Lexapro now, and Xanax as needed for panic attacks. I have never abused my xanax, and don't imagine I ever will. That I think is pivotal in me deciding to stop drinking. Now the only depression and severe anxiety I feel are after heavy drinking. That's a sign in and of itself.
So, for now, it's nice to meet everyone, and my motto is "When it doubt, pour it out, walk away, and try to make it another day."
I'm 30, married, 2 little boys, successful insurance agent, own my home, etc. On the surface things are dandy. I used to binge drink every night. At least 10-15 shots per night of whiskey. Every night. For the past 10 years. The only sober time I had in those 10 years (more than a day or two) was when I was pregnant both times. That's one heck of a problem.
I'm on day 2. Feeling fine. I have always used drinking to deal with my depression and anxiety, which is funny because the rebound depression and anxiety after a bad night of drinking was unimaginable. I have more of a psychological dependence, less of a physical dependence. No shakes, dizziness, nausea, or pains. Just the nagging voice telling me I "need" to drink or else I'll.... do what? Nothing, exactly.
I'm on Lexapro now, and Xanax as needed for panic attacks. I have never abused my xanax, and don't imagine I ever will. That I think is pivotal in me deciding to stop drinking. Now the only depression and severe anxiety I feel are after heavy drinking. That's a sign in and of itself.
So, for now, it's nice to meet everyone, and my motto is "When it doubt, pour it out, walk away, and try to make it another day."
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Be careful mixing Xanax and alcohol - especially after you've gotten a little sober time. It can be deadly. That's why it says, "Do not drink alcohol while taking this medication." I also mixed the two. I was lucky.
Welcome to the forum. My anxiety and depression (it turns out) was being caused by the alcohol and the faulty thinking that goes along with drinking too much. I hope you will continue to remain abstinent, and understand that your anxiety is going to increase quite a lot for a while after you quit. Give it three months minimum for your emotions to stabilize.
Welcome to the forum. My anxiety and depression (it turns out) was being caused by the alcohol and the faulty thinking that goes along with drinking too much. I hope you will continue to remain abstinent, and understand that your anxiety is going to increase quite a lot for a while after you quit. Give it three months minimum for your emotions to stabilize.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,426
If you haven't gone without alcohol for more than 24 hours for years,
be very careful about delayed physical reactions.
Day 2 may still be early for withdrawal symptoms--
If you feel ill be sure to get help immediately--don't just
try to tough it out.
Glad you joined us and wishing you a sober 2016
be very careful about delayed physical reactions.
Day 2 may still be early for withdrawal symptoms--
If you feel ill be sure to get help immediately--don't just
try to tough it out.
Glad you joined us and wishing you a sober 2016
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: UK, South Coast
Posts: 605
Hi & welcome to SR, ive been binge drinking once or twice a week for the last 10 years only having some time off when i too was pregnant. (Also 2 boys, 2 & 3). I hid my addiction from everyone & my partner just thought i was rediculously alcohol sensitive as i was drinking twice as much secretly.
I came here a few yrs ago & posted once, but I've now been sober since Oct 18th. I come on here everyday & its been paramount to my recovery. Great support & knowledge from all different types. Welcome & good luck!!!
I came here a few yrs ago & posted once, but I've now been sober since Oct 18th. I come on here everyday & its been paramount to my recovery. Great support & knowledge from all different types. Welcome & good luck!!!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,564
Welcome - happy to meet you, WhenInDoubt. Would give anything to go back to being 30 and quit. 
I waited far too long. You'll find plenty of encouraging advice and friendship here.
I waited far too long. You'll find plenty of encouraging advice and friendship here.
Recoverer of Self
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 297
Hi WiD...I'm RahRah and I'm an alcoholic as well...a highly functioning addict....same deal...own my business and beautiful home and cars..all the toys..etc., mother of 2 perfect young children...but what describes me best is FULL BLOWN ADDICT. I drink/drank to help me get through all the pressure I put on myself...to deal with depression and anxiety...to avoid feeling....to get me through...and yes...the next day is worse with regret and shame so I drink/drank again so that I can do it all over again...and around and around it goes. It sucks...I'm blessed but can't see that because I live inside a bottle...I can't enjoy my life because my addiction comes first.
I know the torture of the downward spiral...but I'm trying to change that by not drinking...and I'm finally willing to do whatever it takes....ANYTHING. You've found a good place here...I get tons of support from the people here...give it a try...at least for today!
I know the torture of the downward spiral...but I'm trying to change that by not drinking...and I'm finally willing to do whatever it takes....ANYTHING. You've found a good place here...I get tons of support from the people here...give it a try...at least for today!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Florida
Posts: 50
Wow, thank you all for the very warm welcome!
I made it through day 2, no issues. Only a minor craving at my normal drinking time, but I played xbox with my son and it passed. On to day 3!
Day 3 is my worst. I feel good, I feel "better", and so of course it's very easy to forget why I DON'T and WON'T drink again. I can do this, I will do this, and if I start to fumble, I will be back here posting and reading until I realize why I am doing this.
I was reading a few threads and I think I would like a journal, daily (or hourly, whichever the case may be) check-in for myself. I guess I may as well do it here!
I made it through day 2, no issues. Only a minor craving at my normal drinking time, but I played xbox with my son and it passed. On to day 3!
Day 3 is my worst. I feel good, I feel "better", and so of course it's very easy to forget why I DON'T and WON'T drink again. I can do this, I will do this, and if I start to fumble, I will be back here posting and reading until I realize why I am doing this.
I was reading a few threads and I think I would like a journal, daily (or hourly, whichever the case may be) check-in for myself. I guess I may as well do it here!
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