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Yesterday was hard

Old 12-16-2015, 12:34 PM
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Yesterday was hard

So yesterday was hard day 4 without a drink ... It was a friends birthday yesterday who I only very recently embarrass myself infront of to the point they kicked me out of their house and told me to lose their number ( another drunken night)... So when I was intoxicated I thought I didn't care what they thought of me and maybe I don't care what they think of me... The worst part is I still care for them I didn't want to act like that I front of them and they deserved better I should have been a better friend... But because of my actions I can't even send a birthday msg... I didn't have a drink yesterday but trying to deal with feeling as down as I was about my actions without a drink felt like torture... How do I deal with all these feeling of regret without drinking... That was my go to so I didn't care... Hopefully today is a better day
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Old 12-16-2015, 12:41 PM
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How's having a drink will help you deal with the situation? Will it change anything? No. It will just make you feel worse the day after that you drank. Stay on track.
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Old 12-16-2015, 12:47 PM
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Originally Posted by Bettalife View Post
How do I deal with all these feeling of regret without drinking...
You just do.

Regrets are proof you have conscience. That's a good thing. Regrets ease with time. Long-term sobriety ensures you don't repeat the things that caused your regretful actions.

You can't undo what you did. But you can move on without repeating them.
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Old 12-16-2015, 12:48 PM
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It takes time to learn to forgive ourselves for the wrongs we've done. Be the best sober person you can be and time will heal the wounds.
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Old 12-16-2015, 12:53 PM
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Hi Bettalife

I'd focus on yourself right now and not drinking...there will be a time, down the road a little, when you can start mending fences...but that time is not now

Just staying sober took all my energy for the first 30 days or so.

Drinking more won't make the regret go away - it just brings more things to regret.
Living right makes the regret go away.

D
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Old 12-16-2015, 01:09 PM
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Hi Bettalife, welcome.

Regret, shame, fear, guilt, etc etc etc were always reasons for me to drink to ease the pain, or so I thought. As you gather sober time, you realize that drinking only makes things worse. If you never face them with a clear mind, they are always going to be there. Masking it with booze is like putting a bandaid on a gushing wound. I wish you the best. I know how you feel. But you can do this, and you have came to a great place to start. I wish I had known about this sight earlier in my sobriety, but it is now my rock.
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Old 12-16-2015, 01:13 PM
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I'm sorry to hear you had such a hard time but glad to hear you didn't drink! It's hard in the beginning to have to really start accepting our actions but it gets better with time. Drinking only makes things worse and adds to the list of regrets while postponing the inevitable. Eventually, you have to deal with the feelings so doing it now is better than later. You can do this. Stay strong!
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Old 12-16-2015, 04:11 PM
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Hey Bettalife

I'm going through a very similar situation dealing with the actions of my drunken behaviour the last few weeks before sobering up. There is really nothing I can do but accept what I cannot change.
Right now the fact that you are still sober is number 1.
Hang in there you're doing great
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Old 12-16-2015, 04:30 PM
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your well being is number 1 now. drinking wont do anything but make it worse .you can get through this
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Old 12-16-2015, 10:28 PM
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I would try doing something nice for someone even a stranger. It will make you feel better. You're not a bad person (I've read your posts). The booze is bad, not you.

If all else fails, buy a bum a sandwich. You can toss it at him as you drive by. You don't even have to slow down. I do it all the time-always makes me better. I'm kidding.

If nothing else drop some change in the Salvation Kettle. You know they help a lot of recovering alcoholics.
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Old 12-16-2015, 11:44 PM
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Congrats on day 4
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Old 12-17-2015, 12:33 PM
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Thanks for all the support and suggestions.. It really does help to read replies from everyone it helps me get out of my own head and and out of my own way .. Another day down without a drink ...Thanks again
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Old 12-17-2015, 12:54 PM
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Tomorrow is always a better day! Congrats on staying sober! Keep pushing forward and you will show how much of a better person you are
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Old 12-17-2015, 02:09 PM
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Hi Bettalife, stick to your guns. Time heals most everything. Alcohol caused this problem, it certainly won't solve it as well. Keep us posted.
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Old 12-17-2015, 03:26 PM
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Congrats Bettalife, proud of you!

keep going strong
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