No clutter Wee-kender December 11th Part 2
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
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No clutter Wee-kender December 11th Part 2 
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
Today will be better. Yesterday was the worst self-recrimination session I've had in a long time. It happens to everyone from time to time, I'm sure. I had to forcefully remind myself over and over again how far I've come in the past year, and that mistakes of the past are just that - mistakes, and in the PAST. No future repetition of same mistakes will be made. I have to be content with that and continue to move forward. I can only apologize so much. I have done most of my apologizing, but yesterday I made a list of a few more folks I need to contact. It's hard, and not fun, but needs to be done.
Little bit of work work today, then some de-cluttering around the house. Should help my attitude continue to improve.
Little bit of work work today, then some de-cluttering around the house. Should help my attitude continue to improve.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
Thanks for your well thought out response to my post yesterday, Venecia. Yes, you've hit on most of the questions and hesitations in my mind. I do think I see it as an "intensely personal narrative," and this is probably the closest to the heart of it all. There's also grief and regret over my mom there as well. And it hurts to revisit. I think I'm ok with any shame on my part for my own alcohol-fueled behavior. And as you've said, I certainly wouldn't set out to whitewash anything. I have never been interested in writing my own memoir or anything resembling an autobiography. 
I've always been about fiction, and about weaving my truths and observations into someone else's story. There's that "distance" element that I'd be relinquishing in order to write a memoir.
Mesa, your viewpoint is something I've considered as well. I am all about living in the present. Yes, I certainly get what you're saying about "been there, drank that" and not needing to go back for a visit.
BigS, no, not at all am I interested in using this piece of writing as any sort of personal motivational "kick-starter" as you say. I guess I've got my inspiration and goals in place already. My life is in order. And it was a long time coming. This writing would be for the purpose of simply recording my personal story, and mostly, for the benefit of others to read it.
Thanks, you all. Venecia, thanks again for your thoughts on this. I think you get where I'm coming from. I appreciate the time you put into that reply.
I've always been about fiction, and about weaving my truths and observations into someone else's story. There's that "distance" element that I'd be relinquishing in order to write a memoir.Mesa, your viewpoint is something I've considered as well. I am all about living in the present. Yes, I certainly get what you're saying about "been there, drank that" and not needing to go back for a visit.
BigS, no, not at all am I interested in using this piece of writing as any sort of personal motivational "kick-starter" as you say. I guess I've got my inspiration and goals in place already. My life is in order. And it was a long time coming. This writing would be for the purpose of simply recording my personal story, and mostly, for the benefit of others to read it.
Thanks, you all.
Venecia, thanks again for your thoughts on this. I think you get where I'm coming from. I appreciate the time you put into that reply. Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Yay Marty! I'm glad you're feeling better. You're right that one can only apologize so much. Good thinking on the decluttering. I'm working on that too and it feels good.
Heading to work. Another gray day with rain expected. Fine by me. I'm not in a rush for snow.
Heading to work. Another gray day with rain expected. Fine by me. I'm not in a rush for snow.
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: usa
Posts: 3,938
Marty, I missed what you wrote yesterday. But what you said today resonated with me. I am constantly struggling with poor choices I made in my past. Regrets that are toxic. And it's things that I did in sobriety the first time, along with in drunken times. Thinking of myself and hurting others. Particularly my children. But we made it through ithe all. ..I did what I had to to get myself free. I did the best i could at the time, i wasnt a fighter. Not that strong. I would do it differently today if I had it to do over again. I am a stronger person today. All I can do is be the best I can be today. And most important, I need to forgive myself.
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
So I search the loft for some books and find 3 Richard Dawkins books I've already read did find an old dog toy from my first dog so I gave it to Glen we also pulled out the Christmas tree first time I'm putting it up in 2 years but were doing it at the weekend as we want to get some new decorations aswell
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Home.
Put on some Xmas music.
SW - I don't know what exactly up, just feel ..down.
I don't know, Ruby.....Forever
Put on some Xmas music.
SW - I don't know what exactly up, just feel ..down.
Originally Posted by Ruby2 
.
MB, hugs. I'm sorry you continue to feel low. How long have you been feeling this way?
MB, hugs. I'm sorry you continue to feel low. How long have you been feeling this way?
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