First Counseling Session
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 376
First Counseling Session
Just had my first counseling session this evening. A bit surreal. I laid everything out and got some good coping ideas from the counselor. Have another session booked for the end of next week already.
This will definitely help me be accountable going to these sessions. If you are just starting out on this journey, I highly recommend getting counseling along with other forms of support (i.e. AA, SR, books, etc..)
This will definitely help me be accountable going to these sessions. If you are just starting out on this journey, I highly recommend getting counseling along with other forms of support (i.e. AA, SR, books, etc..)
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Well done!!
And I just want to heartily agree and endorse counseling.
"Not drinking" is just one slice of sobriety.
For me, there were layers of myself that I also needed help addressing.
Had I just focused on "not drinking" I'm sure I'd have gone back to drinking. But I focused instead on "becoming the person I want to be", "being the person I really am inside", "healing the hurt boy within", "becoming OK with myself", "living life fully and as deeply as I can".
All of these things contribute directly to my not drinking, but far more valuable than that - these are the things that have enabled me to grow and to evolve and to learn and find more and more happiness in sobriety.
I'm happy for you, keep it up!
And I just want to heartily agree and endorse counseling.
"Not drinking" is just one slice of sobriety.
For me, there were layers of myself that I also needed help addressing.
Had I just focused on "not drinking" I'm sure I'd have gone back to drinking. But I focused instead on "becoming the person I want to be", "being the person I really am inside", "healing the hurt boy within", "becoming OK with myself", "living life fully and as deeply as I can".
All of these things contribute directly to my not drinking, but far more valuable than that - these are the things that have enabled me to grow and to evolve and to learn and find more and more happiness in sobriety.
I'm happy for you, keep it up!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
I chose to see a general therapist, not an addiction counselor. She has experience with addiction, most therapists will. But addiction is not her primary focus. Her focus is actually trauma and the impact of childhood trauma on our adult selves.
I don't mean trauma of the dramatic sort. I wasn't abused or any of the stereotypical after school special sort of stories. Yet I had trauma; from my parent's divorce, the abandonment of my father, the treatment I received from his second wife, negative early sexual experiences, and trauma to self - from my own choices and behaviors. These traumas shaped me and we all have them. We all have things that are unresolved.
For those of us who struggle with addiction, often these unresolved weights we carry are the very anchors of our addictions. I have found that a therapist skilled in helping work through these has been really really helpful. We almost never talk about alcohol or drugs. I've made only a few references to that in our sessions. We talk instead about my experiences as a child, as a man, as a youth. We talk about my feelings and emotions and reactions and responses to life today and how they are tied to my past. We talk about and work cognitively through ways to shift my thinking, to heal the inner wounds and to move past those old beliefs.
I have also done group work, men's retreats and group therapy that have been really powerful in this regard.
Addiction counselors are probably very very helpful as well - I just wanted to point out that there is also value in broader counseling with a skilled therapist who can guide us through growth and healing and psychological change.
I don't mean trauma of the dramatic sort. I wasn't abused or any of the stereotypical after school special sort of stories. Yet I had trauma; from my parent's divorce, the abandonment of my father, the treatment I received from his second wife, negative early sexual experiences, and trauma to self - from my own choices and behaviors. These traumas shaped me and we all have them. We all have things that are unresolved.
For those of us who struggle with addiction, often these unresolved weights we carry are the very anchors of our addictions. I have found that a therapist skilled in helping work through these has been really really helpful. We almost never talk about alcohol or drugs. I've made only a few references to that in our sessions. We talk instead about my experiences as a child, as a man, as a youth. We talk about my feelings and emotions and reactions and responses to life today and how they are tied to my past. We talk about and work cognitively through ways to shift my thinking, to heal the inner wounds and to move past those old beliefs.
I have also done group work, men's retreats and group therapy that have been really powerful in this regard.
Addiction counselors are probably very very helpful as well - I just wanted to point out that there is also value in broader counseling with a skilled therapist who can guide us through growth and healing and psychological change.
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