The beginning of the end...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 17
The beginning of the end...
Today 12:41 PM by utterlybroken
This months circle reached a semicircular point, honeymoon period lasted a day instead of 12. Today I feel like a deflating helium balloon caught in a slight whisp, zig zaging instead of the usual frantic thud to earth. No more shell shock, it hasnt tumbled for a while, instead, I feel the slow motion play, the numbness is definitely easier to cope with.
He chose drink over me. Ive had no answer, but in my heart I know. Ive finally 'hit the bottom" Today, he was told, I know he'll already be sourcing the next emotional contact not anyone in particular but a few. Ive seen it before. If he loves me he'll chose us. He wont. He won't no matter how much I want it. Today it doesnt hurt. I thanked him for letting me love him even if it was for a short time. I got nothing. Will get nothing. It hurts but not as bad as it has.
This months circle reached a semicircular point, honeymoon period lasted a day instead of 12. Today I feel like a deflating helium balloon caught in a slight whisp, zig zaging instead of the usual frantic thud to earth. No more shell shock, it hasnt tumbled for a while, instead, I feel the slow motion play, the numbness is definitely easier to cope with.
He chose drink over me. Ive had no answer, but in my heart I know. Ive finally 'hit the bottom" Today, he was told, I know he'll already be sourcing the next emotional contact not anyone in particular but a few. Ive seen it before. If he loves me he'll chose us. He wont. He won't no matter how much I want it. Today it doesnt hurt. I thanked him for letting me love him even if it was for a short time. I got nothing. Will get nothing. It hurts but not as bad as it has.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
There's a movie which ends this way. The man manages to give up drinking but his girlfriend will not and he sadly watches her from a window walking down the street in the rain towards a bar, losing her but sober himself. Sobriety sometimes means giving up relationships. Sad but sometimes you just have to go your own way.
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W.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
I'm sorry for your situation.
One of the biggest mistakes I would make on my recovery road was to believe that how I currently felt would be how I would always feel.
It has never ever worked that way, and it never ever will.
One of the biggest mistakes I would make on my recovery road was to believe that how I currently felt would be how I would always feel.
It has never ever worked that way, and it never ever will.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Sorry you've been through all that. But it sounds like him going is actually going to be a positive thing for you. Now you can focus on you and your dd, and get strong and positive. Money is worth much less than your sanity.
I'm not sure why you are so reluctant to ask for help from agencies that might involve the police - even if you have had issues with them in the past, they will still be sympathetic of your plight, if only for your daughter. Please don't let your pride and fear keep you from seeking the help that you deserve, and that could turn this 'end' into a 'fresh start'. Pride and fear has caused and prolonged many peoples pain on here (mine included).
Try not to let what other people may or may not think about you / him / the situation / your breakup / etc. distract you. You have bigger fish to fry now, and can choose to do it with grace, and avoid any further dramas or conflicts - it is not what your daughter or you need. He has chosen alcohol, because he is an alcoholic. You can't save him, but you can save yourself and your daughter.
Good luck.
This isn't the end. It's the beginning.
I'm not sure why you are so reluctant to ask for help from agencies that might involve the police - even if you have had issues with them in the past, they will still be sympathetic of your plight, if only for your daughter. Please don't let your pride and fear keep you from seeking the help that you deserve, and that could turn this 'end' into a 'fresh start'. Pride and fear has caused and prolonged many peoples pain on here (mine included).
Try not to let what other people may or may not think about you / him / the situation / your breakup / etc. distract you. You have bigger fish to fry now, and can choose to do it with grace, and avoid any further dramas or conflicts - it is not what your daughter or you need. He has chosen alcohol, because he is an alcoholic. You can't save him, but you can save yourself and your daughter.
Good luck.
This isn't the end. It's the beginning.
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