SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

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-   -   Needing some advise (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/380068-needing-some-advise.html)

shellyswartz 11-29-2015 12:21 PM

Needing some advise
 
I am 17 days clean. Today has been the hardest day. Im thinking about.
About using. Since ive stopped using i have no friends. I dnt know.

Augusta1893 11-29-2015 12:28 PM

You posted here first that is a good sign. Stay strong. I am only a few days in with several failed past attempts but use the support and strength you get from SR. We are all pulling for you.

abraxas69 11-29-2015 12:33 PM

Stop thinking about it. Do something else, distract yourself. Keep posting here, read other posts, you'll find an enormous amount of support here - it really does help. :grouphug:

zerothehero 11-29-2015 12:41 PM

The friend thing is an adjustment. It used to make me sad, but it's not such a concern anymore cuz all my old friends are hammered all the time.

Consider other social outlets. AA meetings or volunteering somewhere. We all need connection. We're here for you.

Meraviglioso 11-29-2015 12:49 PM

Hi and welcome to SR. It is a great sign that you took the time to sign up and post before using, it shows you are in the right mindset of wanting to be done with your drug of choice. I hope you can work through this and keep those 17 days going. Some exercise might be a good idea. Or you could treat yourself to a special meal or snack.
I am sorry you are feeling lonely and without friends. Unfortunately in sobriety we often have to stay away from certain people and places. There are a lot of ways to make sober friends though. I know a lot of people who have made amazing friends and connections through AA and NA. What about looking up some meetings if you have never been?

Anna 11-29-2015 12:52 PM

There are lots of changes involved in early recovery and losing friends is often an issue. This is a time when you might want to try new things in order to socialize and meet people. As Zero said, volunteering is a good way to meet people. Congratulations on 17 days clean and try to be patient while things are changing.

Soberwolf 11-29-2015 12:57 PM

Nice to meet you Shelly

Berrybean 11-29-2015 12:59 PM


Originally Posted by Meraviglioso (Post 5666632)
... I know a lot of people who have made amazing friends and connections through AA and NA. What about looking up some meetings if you have never been?

I have been fortunate in making some amazing new friends in the rooms of AA, and also at church.

I have also found that some of my old drinking buddies are happy to meet up to go for coffee or for a walk or to go shopping (not many of them - just a handful, but the relationships have become deeper).

I have also nurtured some of the relationships that I had neglected for many years - with family and childhood friends - and have been very surprised at how forgiving and open-armed these people have been to my approaches and attempts to renew and build on the relationships.

I have also volunteered my help for different things - helping in the creche at church; making teas and coffees for church; marshalling at local running events - there will be lots of things that you could get involved in and meet new friends.

But, most surprisingly, as recovery has worked its magic, I have become a friend to myself, and no longer fear spending time alone. I can enjoy some quiet time and feel at peace.

Things will get better - but you may need to learn to socialise and reach out in new ways.

I hope you find some ways of breaking out of the loneliness. :)

least 11-29-2015 01:09 PM

Welcome to the family. I'm glad you joined us. :)

PurpleKnight 11-29-2015 01:51 PM

Welcome to the Forum Shelly!! :wave:

Dee74 11-29-2015 02:05 PM

Good to have you with us Shelly :)

The thing I loved about SR when I found it was that people understand....you'll find a ton of support here :)

Welcome :)
D

loulou1981 11-29-2015 02:46 PM

Hey, welcome. How ru getting on? Keep posting


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