Back To Curly
Back To Curly
As a child growing up until the past year I never knew the texture of my hair, due to having straightening chemicals applied from a young age. It was one of those things I never thought about. It was understood in my culture that if you didn't have what was considered "good hair," you should alter it. I found later that part of learning to love and accept myself was to know who I am. As months went by I cut a little of the straightened hair off until a year later I was presented with my real hair...curly! Hence the name CurlyGirl.
That was just a small symbol of how important it was for me to discover who I am, unaltered. I'm not against straightening hair, it's just what my personal journey consisted of.
After that, then it came time to discover who I am without alcohol. My first couple of times trying to quit I was angry and felt that I became a boring person. A person who lacked energy and vibrancy. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I could no longer rely on the effects of alcohol to make me a social flower. I went back to what seemed to make me "the person to be around," alcohol. What's funny is the friends I thought I was making during my alcohol abuse have all been run off by my behavior. This last whack at sobriety is a real treat as I am learning about myself, what makes me laugh like a child, what I detest, what my goals are, what kind of friends I attract, what my boundaries are, all kinds of stuff. I am embracing this new person, and I'm noticing that I have become a person that people like to be around by just being me.
That was just a small symbol of how important it was for me to discover who I am, unaltered. I'm not against straightening hair, it's just what my personal journey consisted of.
After that, then it came time to discover who I am without alcohol. My first couple of times trying to quit I was angry and felt that I became a boring person. A person who lacked energy and vibrancy. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I could no longer rely on the effects of alcohol to make me a social flower. I went back to what seemed to make me "the person to be around," alcohol. What's funny is the friends I thought I was making during my alcohol abuse have all been run off by my behavior. This last whack at sobriety is a real treat as I am learning about myself, what makes me laugh like a child, what I detest, what my goals are, what kind of friends I attract, what my boundaries are, all kinds of stuff. I am embracing this new person, and I'm noticing that I have become a person that people like to be around by just being me.
Great post, Curly. Finding the real me and feeling comfortable in my own skin has been the biggest struggle for me in sobriety. It is definitely a journey. At 4 months sober, I'm finally starting to feel better about who I am as a sober person.
Sounds like you're doing great, Curly. Happy for you!
Dlfin
Sounds like you're doing great, Curly. Happy for you!
Dlfin
Well...my head shape looks better than the pepper color and receding hairline so I did what Bruce Willis did (except mature, make a lot of money and divorce when it was clear it weren't working). Congrats CG!
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
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Good for you, CurlyGirl! I too am a wavy/curly girl and can remember my mother and stepmother trying to "fix" my hair growing up. It was called "messy" and "unruly." My mom even made fun of it. When I was in high school, my last year, I decided to stop straightening, and just let it go ... people were pretty astounded at the result. I got some compliments for the first time! Hair seems to always look better in its natural state So, today, in my 30's I don't color it, and I mostly wear it curly.
Hi CG - know what you mean. I have always, since early teens worn heavy make-up, and had a very specific 'style' which I felt was 'me' and that I needed to keep it maintained. At times pretty much else in my life had slipped (or subsided) but right to the end I still made sure that I was in full camouflage (make-up) and not a (dyed) hair out of place.
Since getting sober and embarking on my journey of recovery I have realised that this is what I DID - not who I was / am. My hair and make up is now much more subdued and natural. Occasionally people will say they 'miss' seeing me dressed up, but I no longer feel that I own it to anyone to look any particular way. I am who I am, and I'll look how I look. There's more important things to worry about in my day now And I'm much happier for it.
Since getting sober and embarking on my journey of recovery I have realised that this is what I DID - not who I was / am. My hair and make up is now much more subdued and natural. Occasionally people will say they 'miss' seeing me dressed up, but I no longer feel that I own it to anyone to look any particular way. I am who I am, and I'll look how I look. There's more important things to worry about in my day now And I'm much happier for it.
I am so glad that many of you could relate whether it was hair, makeup, or simply being expected to be someone you're not. I believe the more self discovery you embark, the more self appreciation you'll develop, and the more fulfilling your life will be!
As a child growing up until the past year I never knew the texture of my hair, due to having straightening chemicals applied from a young age. It was one of those things I never thought about. It was understood in my culture that if you didn't have what was considered "good hair," you should alter it. I found later that part of learning to love and accept myself was to know who I am. As months went by I cut a little of the straightened hair off until a year later I was presented with my real hair...curly! Hence the name CurlyGirl.
That was just a small symbol of how important it was for me to discover who I am, unaltered. I'm not against straightening hair, it's just what my personal journey consisted of.
After that, then it came time to discover who I am without alcohol. My first couple of times trying to quit I was angry and felt that I became a boring person. A person who lacked energy and vibrancy. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I could no longer rely on the effects of alcohol to make me a social flower. I went back to what seemed to make me "the person to be around," alcohol. What's funny is the friends I thought I was making during my alcohol abuse have all been run off by my behavior. This last whack at sobriety is a real treat as I am learning about myself, what makes me laugh like a child, what I detest, what my goals are, what kind of friends I attract, what my boundaries are, all kinds of stuff. I am embracing this new person, and I'm noticing that I have become a person that people like to be around by just being me.
That was just a small symbol of how important it was for me to discover who I am, unaltered. I'm not against straightening hair, it's just what my personal journey consisted of.
After that, then it came time to discover who I am without alcohol. My first couple of times trying to quit I was angry and felt that I became a boring person. A person who lacked energy and vibrancy. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I could no longer rely on the effects of alcohol to make me a social flower. I went back to what seemed to make me "the person to be around," alcohol. What's funny is the friends I thought I was making during my alcohol abuse have all been run off by my behavior. This last whack at sobriety is a real treat as I am learning about myself, what makes me laugh like a child, what I detest, what my goals are, what kind of friends I attract, what my boundaries are, all kinds of stuff. I am embracing this new person, and I'm noticing that I have become a person that people like to be around by just being me.
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