back again
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Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 280
back again
I've been here before.
I'm writing this drunk. and if that puts anyone off i don't blame you.
I've suffered the insomnia.
I'm finally sleeping better. i just can't seem to stop the weekend binge.
was back home for the holidays and drank drank drank.
back in singapore now. back to work. my boss sees a difference. can't seem to concentrate.
i have been to aa 3 times. just so ambivalent about quitting drinking.
everytime i resolve to stop... 3 days later I'm convincing myself to get loaded again.
I've been here 1000 times.
i need serious help. i have staetorrhea. and cramps and i still drink.
I'm functional. i keep my job. and my wife and parents aren't aware how deep in the hole i am.
i feel like quitting my job, or quitting my marriage, or quitting my life. just feel like quitting.
i know i will wake up tomorrow and gget through it.
i know i will feel like getting smashed again on friday.
is there any relief from this?
i feel like such failure.
ash
I'm writing this drunk. and if that puts anyone off i don't blame you.
I've suffered the insomnia.
I'm finally sleeping better. i just can't seem to stop the weekend binge.
was back home for the holidays and drank drank drank.
back in singapore now. back to work. my boss sees a difference. can't seem to concentrate.
i have been to aa 3 times. just so ambivalent about quitting drinking.
everytime i resolve to stop... 3 days later I'm convincing myself to get loaded again.
I've been here 1000 times.
i need serious help. i have staetorrhea. and cramps and i still drink.
I'm functional. i keep my job. and my wife and parents aren't aware how deep in the hole i am.
i feel like quitting my job, or quitting my marriage, or quitting my life. just feel like quitting.
i know i will wake up tomorrow and gget through it.
i know i will feel like getting smashed again on friday.
is there any relief from this?
i feel like such failure.
ash
Drash; you are listening to your Alcoholic voice and buying into all the lies and nonsense that it is telling you.
Alcoholism, without recovery, is a one-way ticket to despair, self-loathing, physical/mental/spiritual deterioration and a host of other negative experiences.
Shut that AV down, drash; buy a ticket to sobriety, instead. it's a much better ride with a pretty incredible view.
I'm sorry you feel this way. I can relate. I remember those days of not wanting ANYTHING to do with life but drinking the day in front of me away.
I thought about quitting my job...I thought about quitting my relationship, etc....
It's skewed/flawed thinking caused by the alcohol in my experience.
I took the alcohol out of the picture and those thoughts went away. But i can relate...I did have them. And alcohol told me that they were right.
Get help. Grab ahold of AA and go everyday. Don't listen to yourself (and the Alcoholic voice/thoughts)...
SR is here for you. AA is there for you. But you have to take control. You need to fight for it. Don't give up.
Findingtheway
I thought about quitting my job...I thought about quitting my relationship, etc....
It's skewed/flawed thinking caused by the alcohol in my experience.
I took the alcohol out of the picture and those thoughts went away. But i can relate...I did have them. And alcohol told me that they were right.
Get help. Grab ahold of AA and go everyday. Don't listen to yourself (and the Alcoholic voice/thoughts)...
SR is here for you. AA is there for you. But you have to take control. You need to fight for it. Don't give up.
Findingtheway
Some great advice here Drash
I dunno about you, but I used to put a lot of effort into drinking...to stay sober I needed to put at least as much effort into not drinking.
You must want change on some level or you would not have posted here
I hope you'll stick around - become a regular poster - there's a lot of advice and support here.
I dunno about you, but I used to put a lot of effort into drinking...to stay sober I needed to put at least as much effort into not drinking.
You must want change on some level or you would not have posted here
I hope you'll stick around - become a regular poster - there's a lot of advice and support here.
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