Garden Girl

I called out to work Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday... I was hungover one day, had panic and anxiety attacks the rest of Tuesday. This just drug me downs more. I was having some issues at work, non alcohol related. The company I work for downsized and more work for less people essentially. With it being retail and holidays the workload has quadroopled, I started to lose my organization and the. Fall behind on work... So then I start drinking. Then less gets done, then I feel like my entire life is falling apart. I went to see my counselor Tuesday, my husband came along for support to see what he cane do to help. It was good. I was scheduled off today so I took it. I feel depressed and want to drink. I know I shouldn't. Wanted to come here for support. Maybe it's the time of year, maybe it's all the changes, maybe it's the alcoholism..

Nonsensical

Maybe?

I think math professors call it 'a statistical certainty'.

What's the plan? How can I help?

ScottFromWI

I'm going to say it's the alcoholism. The time of the year and changes in our lives are not something we have control over. What we do have control over is whether we choose to drink or not. And I think you would agree that most of the problems you describe in your message are a direct result of drinking.

Coming here instead of drinking to seek advice is a great idea. You have a choice in front of you, and your alcoholism is trying to cloud your judgment. You know exactly what will happen if you drink...it will be more missed work, more anxiety, more hangovers, more problems in general.

Have you ever considered attending local AA/NA meetings ( or any other recovery group meeting ) or seeking specific alcohol counseling?

Garden Girl

My plan is to make a cup of tea 1st.
After which, get out next weeks work schedule and plan the following around it:
1. Meals to make sure my blood sugar isn't dropping and for structure
2. Yoga, for mindfulness
3. Reminders that it is ok to tell people that you want a drink... As long as they realize you can't have one.. Like Husband and SR.

Garden Girl

Also, I did speak with one of my bosses at work and let them know that my schedule needs more structure and consistency in order for me to be successful and it would be optimal to have a 6a-3p shift with tues and wed off.. She is going to see what she can do. I felt kind of guilty for asking for these things, but think that structure will make me successful (not to mention help me control drinking)

Garden Girl

I did try AA and it was not optimal. They paired me with a lady who replaced a drinking addiction with a sex addiction and it was an extremely uncomfortable place for me, I will not be going back. I have been in counseling for a while now and it has helped me a great deal. Lastly, I started drinking again when things started falling apart, so no, they were not all a result of alcohol.

PurpleKnight

A cup of tea is always a good way forward, it beats having a drink!!

The problem with work is it can be stressful, but we have to break the cycle of go to work, get stressed, come home and drink, we need new tools in toolbox of life and a plan to deal with the inevitability of stress.

You can do this!!

Dee74

But drinking clearly didn't make anything better

I found support was vital for me - sometimes the way is hard - especially when
I'm trying to deal with hard things and the only tool I ever had for hard things was drinking.

Read around, see what other people are doing. There are solutions and means of coping with life a -plenty in these forums.

And if AA was helpful at all, I'd maybe re-think things there too - sounds like you ran up against a people problem rather than an AA one?

loulou1981

3. Reminders that it is ok to tell people that you want a drink... As long as they realize you can't have one.. Like Husband and SR.[/QUOTE]
🔝

Definitely important, i only said this to my fiance earlier "i want a drink, how am i gonna cope during xmas"!!!!?????
I believe im not going to drink but its nice to be honest when u want to!!!!

Soberwolf

Remember you don't want you want a drink your AV wants a drink

You want to get sober don't let that AV tell you lies

AV is the voice in your head wanting a drink Addiction Voice

Have you considered Smart recovery since AA didn't work out or Lifering or AVRT ?

Wishing you best in recovery

Garden Girl

Thanks Soberwolf! I going to Guru Google for more info about these!
Thank you

CurlyGirl1978

Garden Girl I feel ya! My AV is yelling at me right now. An earlier schedule might work for you as it did for me in the past. But then again, your AV will always want to be fed. When I worked 7am-3pm I was always hung over half the morning or better yet called in for Mon-Wed. When I worked 1pm-10pm I'd be intoxicated by 12:45pm and either made it in to work trying to hide my intoxication or called in altogether. The shift and the workload doesn't matter, it's the alcoholism that makes the difference, as I have learned 4 jobs later.