adelina123

I drank last night .... i should of posted on here yesterday for support because I knew I was going to be in a situation where I'd be very tempted to drink, I guess it was obvious it was going to happen.

Basically I took my little one to a fire works display which was held at the local pub ... yep that's right I went there on day 5 of being sober not the best idea!! There are reasons though .... mainly one, that I had promised my boy I would take him and because of work it was the closest most convenient display. However. .. i know I could of tried harder to go to a different one, I could of not drank, I promised myself all day I wouldn't drink till it got to about 4 PM when I just mentally caved and decided to buy wine for after the display ... cos obviously I couldn't just have a couple there then go home to nothing.
I'm annoyed with myself but I won't give up trying!!

mecanix

I steered clear of alcohol and establishments selling it for 8-12 months at the beginning .
Staying sober requires effort until it becomes second nature, i hope you make the effort , make the next decision you have to take the right one .

A sane and sober mum/dad is more important long term than a fire work display for your child .

Get back to it , get more support and help , post before it happens next time , yer ?

take care , m

Dee74

Hi Adelina,

No apologies necessary

I do think you need to look at your recovery plan - you seem to be winging it a little bit and, while that certainly the easiest way to do it, it's not often the best.

these two links are great for working out a recovery plan - I hope you'll get something out of them

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...SMA12-4474.pdf

D

Soberwolf

Don't beat yourself up & get plan building Adelina

On The Road

Adelina, don't beat yourself up over it. But I strongly agree with Dee about your plan. It's an essential tool you will use to ensure you're doing everything in your power to stop drinking. It's okay to upset your little one right now over a broken promise because things will only get worse between you as your disease progresses. I have two kids and have spent the last 11 months repairing our relationships for the years I spent choosing booze over their well-being.

adelina123

Thank you everyone and thanks for the links. I could of tried harder I guess, made up an excuse not to go the good news is there are no further occasions or instances coming up that will put me near to drink. Unless I physically buy it to drink home alone I won't be drinking xx

Anna

I'm glad you're back and not giving up.

It sounds like you learned a lot about making tough choices. I think that is one of the most important lessons in early recovery.

loulou1981

Hey Adelina, why ru apologising!!!???? U made a mistake, but uve come clean & nothing has changed in the sense that u still want to get better.
Today is a new day & yes ur right u should hav come on here with ur thoughts as we may have pursuaded u otherwise!!! Never mind, it's not the end of the world!!!

Fly N Buy

Remember the movie Castaway? Do you recall when Tom Hanks tried to get out past the breakers - to that point of no return that would release him from the bondage of that island>?? Quitting drinking and staying stopped was kind of like that for me.

When I final got over the giant waves keeping me locked into my island, I saw/see things much differently. There is likely very few here that didn't fight those waves before staying stopped. Turns out for me, the waves were self perpetuating. Once I let go, things got much better.

Relapse isn't uncommon, but I have learned it does not have to keep repeating itself - it's choice we make to pick up that first drink.

glad you're posting - if you want sobriety, it's there for you.......

JD

You've already heard this, but there is no such thing as failure, just another learning experience. Learn what triggered you this time and plan on how to get around it next time.

PurpleKnight

Don't beat yourself up Adelina, draw a line under it and keep moving forward!!

You can do this!!

BellJar7

Thank you for sharing this, Dee! I'm struggling along with the OP, and someone asked me the other day on another thread if I have a recovery plan yet. I thought, "Well, yeah- to stop drinking and quit feeling like crap..." But I didn't realize there are real steps to take to making a recovery plan. I'll look this over and get started on it this afternoon.

Ruby2

Adelina, it happens so don't beat yourself up about it. However, I did want to say that even though you say there aren't any instances or occasions coming up that involve alcohol, you have to prepare for that. The holidays are approaching. Work on a conscious plan like Dee linked you too and you can feel more confident.

adelina123

Thank you everyone and yes I will be looking at how I can do this thing better and avoid temptation xx

Frank14

Great advice already, and I'll add that the guilt is very dangerous. It's a way for your AV to sneak in and convince you to drink when you're at an emotional weak point. 5 days is a very good accomplishment, so you should pat yourself on the back! Those first few days are very tough. Also, you admit you have a problem and you're trying to get help. This is all good stuff. Listen to those on this site and come here as much as you need to. You simply hit the "reset" button as all of us had at one point. You can do this and it's worth it!