Does this Resonate with Anyone?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 926
Originally Posted by CaptainHaddock 
Hi tufty, welcome back. I hope you stay close and look forward to follow your progress. PS. I remember you were one of the first to reply to my opening post when I joined here in 2016.
It’s lovely to touch base with you. 😊
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 926
Originally Posted by saoutchik
Welcome back Tufty!
You are doing the right thing getting sober, hangovers were still hangovers but they could be laughed about when we were young (quite often over another beer) As we get a bit older they are just painful and debilitating and of there can be much worse health problems.
You have quit before so you know you can do it, you just have to remember that proving you can stop does not mean you can go back to being a "normal" drinker. The "never again" aspect took a bit of mental adjustment but after a while I stopped thinking about it 99.9% of the time.
You are doing the right thing getting sober, hangovers were still hangovers but they could be laughed about when we were young (quite often over another beer) As we get a bit older they are just painful and debilitating and of there can be much worse health problems.
You have quit before so you know you can do it, you just have to remember that proving you can stop does not mean you can go back to being a "normal" drinker. The "never again" aspect took a bit of mental adjustment but after a while I stopped thinking about it 99.9% of the time.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 926
Originally Posted by Dee74
Its easy to fall back into old ways Tufty - glad you're extricating yourself now.
Did you leave Australia?
D
Did you leave Australia?
D
Regret is probably too strong a word but boy I do I miss it. 🤣
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,547
Hey Tufty, remember me. Rolling another bumper? Haha. Are you still off the cigs? I'm not, yet. 
I had to return to SR Tufty and have been sober for 16 months. It is so much better even when it sucks.
Really good to see you back.
I had to return to SR Tufty and have been sober for 16 months. It is so much better even when it sucks.
Really good to see you back.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 926
Originally Posted by Dee74
Hope you’ll be able to come back some time relatively soon 
D
D
Are you still playing music? I have a memory of you being in a band. Or was it drunken dream I had? 😳
That was kind of you to think of me. I haven’t gone anywhere though, I just thought I’d let this thread die so I sent good wishes to Steeley by pm. Or is it dm these days?
Day 6 for me, and all is well.
I know I’m not the first person to say it but you should be knighted, Dee.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2023
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 887
Originally Posted by tufty13
My father was a hopeless alcoholic and my mother an enabler. I rarely saw my father sober.
He was always either drunk or in bed or both.
He died from cirrhosis of the liver when he was 65, having never got to know any of his children, not because we didn't live under the same roof, just because - well, he just never engaged with us.
I had a massive lump in my throat reading this!!
I’m so sorry he didn’t get to know you, or engage with you or your siblings. I feel so heartbroken reading that - and you’re a complete stranger to me!
Before I quit alcohol, I was spending more and more time in bed too - and disengaging with everyone. I was so depressed, I was suicidal. I have kids. One an adult and one teen. I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure they know I’m present for them and interested in their lives, because there was a time where they probably weren’t sure and then a time where they knew for certain. I feel like such an ******** for that and I always keep that thought close, because I don’t think I will ever fully forgive myself for it. They thought they couldn’t rely on me for a while there - and no child should feel that way about their Mum
I think most of us would agree that drinking is progressive. Sometimes fast, sometimes slow, but it’s always progressing. So, where would you like to be in 10 or 20 years is the question I suppose. Because you could kick this can down the road and deal with it then - but at what cost? Health problems. Relationship problems. Financial difficulties. Looking a state. No self esteem. Because that’s where it goes. It creeps in so slowly and all of a sudden you realise how fooked you are from booze
You obviously aren’t anywhere near as bad as your Dad was with the drink. But I have never liked the comparison game. Because there’s ALWAYS someone who is worse than you and always someone who isn’t as bad as you. Either end shouldn’t be some sort of benchmark.
I don’t know how old your kids are, but you’ll still want to have a relationship with them when they are adults, so why risk it by continuing drinking? I know some people in their 30’s who don’t speak to their parents because of the drink
Try and forget about the ‘good times’ with alcohol, as the bad times/effects will always, always outweigh it.
I hope you stick with us! Well done on 3 days. Keep it up. And thank you for your post, it was very emotional for me to read (but in a therapeutic way!)
xxx
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,547
Hey, tufty, welcome back.
You will never regret giving it another shot. The shot that makes it home. 🎯
I really hope to see you around. I missed the laughs we used to have when trying to stop smoking.
I was the “bumper shooter”, and you never judged me.
Never forget you for that Tufty. Hang around. It’s so worth it!
You will never regret giving it another shot. The shot that makes it home. 🎯
I really hope to see you around. I missed the laughs we used to have when trying to stop smoking.
I was the “bumper shooter”, and you never judged me.
Never forget you for that Tufty. Hang around. It’s so worth it!
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,900
Hi Tuffy
The third to the tenth power was the charm for me. Stick around, post here and there, get reengaged in the SR community for success.
The third to the tenth power was the charm for me. Stick around, post here and there, get reengaged in the SR community for success.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 926
Thank you so much everyone for making me feel welcome. Again!
Some wonderful truths in your post KneePad, I'll take everything on board. It's always been the thought that everyone is having a better time than me, that drags me back in. It's never really that good & their are always consequences.
Steely - I wouldn't dare pass judgement. Ever! I'm pretty sure we were bumper buddies, anyway. :-)
Thank you, Dee, Hevyn, Zencat. I have a good feeling about this, clear headed & determined.
Some wonderful truths in your post KneePad, I'll take everything on board. It's always been the thought that everyone is having a better time than me, that drags me back in. It's never really that good & their are always consequences.
Steely - I wouldn't dare pass judgement. Ever! I'm pretty sure we were bumper buddies, anyway. :-)
Thank you, Dee, Hevyn, Zencat. I have a good feeling about this, clear headed & determined.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 926
Originally Posted by ShiningSal
This sounds like me 10 years ago. What I would give to have gotten sober then!
Perhaps we could help each other on our sober journeys, SS?
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,900
Good morning Tuffy from the west cost of the U.S.A.
If you don't drink "now' as in the "now" you will not be drinking in the future. Stay in the "now" at all times.
Have a wonderful day Tuffy
If you don't drink "now' as in the "now" you will not be drinking in the future. Stay in the "now" at all times.
Have a wonderful day Tuffy
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
