loulou1981

I know its a few months away, but are any of u worried about the festive break???? Unless ive been at work i have always been drunk on Christmas day/boxing day & several other days.
I'm only on day 5, but I cannot imagine being sober, i just said to my partner "can i get the xmas meal ready for us this yr as it means alot to me to be sober & make a lovely meal for my family" he said (id forgotten about this) "well the last time u cooked xmas dinner u were so drunk u didn't cook the meat & nearly poisoned us"!!!!
That is just awful, what a state, im NOT doing that this year!!!!

Ghostlight1

I would have been drunk whether it was Christmas or not.
The holidays are a big trigger for me to though.
Man, the stories I could tell about the night before Thanksgiving. I don't know what it was about that day, but man, I got wasted.

If I don't drink for three more days, I will have four years ten months sober.
Yep, I quit on Christmas Eve.
I now avoid holidays like the plague. I don't need the temptation and I'm not big into watching other people get drunk.
I don't eat meat and that's what the whole occasions and meals seems to revolve around, besides gifts on Christmas, so I don't miss the food aspect.

I still hide on those holidays. And am completely fine with that. I look at the spiritual part of Christmas. And **** Thanksgiving. The true meaning of that was lost long ago.

I understand it can be very hard for some to just hide like I do. So, I wish you the best. Ad four days is great, although you're already having anxiety about the holiday. I would be, too.
Sorry for no advice, I just have so many memories about the holidays (all bad) that I just haven't celebrated them the traditional way.

Best to you.

teatreeoil007

Not me, I'll probably be working..

trachemys

That's just awful for your partner to say that!

If you want to soberly cook Christmas dinner, do it. Soberly. Get on with it and don't let others define the new you.

ast1

I'm worried about it.

Make the dinner have fun with it!

newpage119

Hi Loulou,
That sure wasn't very nice of your partner, but this year you just have to show him what you can do when you are sober! Make him "eat" his words!

The Holidays can be very tough. I quit last year right before Thanksgiving. And it nearly wasn't as hard as my AV told me it would be....
My advice is to be super conscious of your sobriety, make that your number one priority. Be prepared!

I stocked up on sparkling juices of all varieties, club soda for mixers, anything fun, festive and non-alcoholic. Fresh limes/lemon/ fruit for garnish. Anything that looks good.
When I traveled to a party, I would bring lots of non alcoholic bevs, way more than I needed.....
Seemed people were very interested in the NA drinks, and drank a lot less alcohol last holiday season.....

Also, come late and leave early if you are worried. Make sure you get a parking spot that you can get out if you want to leave. Give yourself an out/excuse if you think you might need it.

And enjoy the parties - you will remember everything and feel great the morning after!

entropy1964

I don't have a lot of words of wisdom. But I think any resentment and shame that you have regarding your previous holidays (or the words of your husband) should be let go of. The past is the past. Today, this moment is all you have. I try to keep doing the next right thing and generally things work out. I have been sober the last 3 Christmas' and have not regretted it a moment. I focus on the people, specifically my daughter, and also just take it easy. It doesn't have to be perfect, the meal doesn't have to be fancy. To me its about being grateful for each other, as I'm not religious. The tradition, to me, isn't about drinking and eating, its about giving. And if holiday parties etc are triggers just stay away this year. Christmas is 2 months out....stay in this moment don't future trip. And create a new sober tradition. Really? It can be whatever you want

Nonsensical

Why do you think that is?

strategery

I started my sobriety journey just about the same time as you last year. My sobriety date is just a couple of days before Thanksgiving and it did pop into my head that maybe sobriety should wait until the holidays were over.

However, I came to realize that there was never a good time to get sober. There was always an event coming up that I could drink at or some holiday. I knew if kept waiting for the right time to get sober, I was never going to get sober.

thomas11

Good post loulou. You can get through the holidays sober if you put your mind to it and are committed. For myself, I will be spending the Holidays this year with completely different groups of people. Some family drama this year has driven a wedge between myself and my immediate family, so we have made different plans. Change is good.

GnikNus

I got sober three weeks before Christmas last year. Christmas is also my birthday, and then there's New Years right around the corner as well. It was a difficult time to quit, for sure. It was my first attempt at quitting after 15 years and opportunities to drink were all over the place. I was reminded of Lloyd Bridges in "Airplane" when he says "looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking."

This year, I'll be a year sober and it will be far easier. And- after a year of of seeing what sober is like, it will be more enjoyable as well. I'll be present and not hungover with my kids. I'll enjoy a lot of cider. I'll keep the parties to a minimum.

Holidays in the West are so tied up with drinking and it's hard once you've gotten sober to get through them. Easy to get derailed and use them as an excuse to drink. Stay close to SR and have a plan in place for being in social situations that involve alcohol.

doggonecarl

Sober for the holidays? I imagine at five days, that is difficult to imagine. But as you said, It's a couple months before xmas and you will get more used to it as long as you start accepting that you can never drink again. Not as a punishment, but as a choice to live a sober life.

When the holidays approach, keep it simple. Avoid the crazy holiday festivities and stick with family. Avoid alcohol-fueled parties and gatherings. Focus on the blessings sobriety will bring you and your family.

Ruby2

I must be a hermit because my holidays don't involve a lot of alcohol consumption by anyone. I don't get invited to a lot of parties and that's OK.

You can get through the holidays without drinking alcohol. My last quit was in December, and this will be my third sober Christmas and New Year. You can create new sober traditions. If that involves weeding out unsupportive family and friends then you may have to do so.

There is also plenty of support here from like minded people. Come here if you need extra help.

Keep going. There's never a good or magic time to quit, you just have to do it. Congrats on 4 days.

Pondlady

I remember my first sober Christmas season. I was very triggered by all the festive displays of alcohol at our grocery store. I'd usually avoid the alcohol dept., but at x-mas they had displays everywhere! Kind of a sad commentary , if you really thing about it.

Try not to overwhelm yourself by thinking about it now. There are many things to enjoy about the holidays that don't involve alcohol. I used to be too tipsy to drive around and looks a x-mas lights, or attend a x-mas festival. I'm looking forward to some simple pleasure this year and I'll be sober, the greatest gift of all!!!

Ruby2

Congrats on day 5. Don't want to sell you short.

Soberwolf

I had my first Christmas at SR last year you stick with us the first is hard but doable
this will be my 3rd sober Christmas in a row & Christmas is a lot more meaningful sober

Jsbodhi

I ruined christmas last year and had to get sober in dec.
Don't do it!!! Its not worth it xoxo

loulou1981

Unfortunately xmas has always been a boozy affair, my folks drink alot but luckily as i have my own family now (my partner barely drinks) i should cope better as its just us this xmas!

loulou1981

Ive replied to this further down (technical challenge for me)!!!! Ill get there!!!!🙈🙈

Dee74

There's always a ton of support here through the holidays.
Sober Thanksgiving/Xmas? It really can be done

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...val-guide.html

D