kitten29

Hello everyone,
After a few years I made the decision to go sober one month ago. I'm now one month sober! Weirdly finding it harder starting my second month than I did the first. I think because in the beginning, I could see the benefits so easily because the memories of how things were drunk were so fresh. But now I can hear myself thinking, "hey things are fine, maybe I just needed to reset myself. Everyone else can drink!" I'm hoping it will get easier and the temptation won't increase?!
Also getting very tired and craving sugar a lot. I'm hoping I'm not the only one?
Sending love and good wishes to everyone, from London x

MIRecovery

After being on SR for a while I think just about anything is normal.

The key to sobriety is all of the things you are doing besides not drinking. For me it was AA, professional help, spirituality, new friends, a dry house, addiction education, honesty, and new activities.

Nothing changes if nothing changes

ItWillBeWorthIt

Don't think you can moderate... it doesn't work. Many have tried for the same reason you are thinking... they have huge regrets.

Reflect back to Day 1... and Day 2... do you really want to go through that again? Or, think about what could happen if you do pick up... drastic things can happen.

Stay focused - one day at a time - abstinence. This way you will have NO regrets.

sva777

Hey kitten, I craved sugar for months after I quit. It did subside eventually, just go with it. I did eat much ice cream.

About thinking about drinking again, is that something you really want to do? After 1 month time you are thinking you no longer have a problem with alcohol? If you did have a problem what's to say you won't fall back into your old ways?

Mentium

'Resetting' is a good word - wish I had thought of it. That's what so many of us do I suspect. I know I have many times. Attempts to 'quit' became breaks (longer and shorter) which were self-dryout periods. Trouble was, in my case anyway, as a daily drinker, that it gets harder and harder to start that 'resetting' break.

JD

Feelings of "hey, this isn't so hard, maybe I've got his licked and can drink moderately" I find very normal. DON'T FALL FOR THEM. You won't be able to.And you won't have those feelings just in the first month so be prepared for them. Sure the first few days you'll be able to have only a couple but it won't be long and you'll be right back to where you were before you stopped drinking. I've been there too many times. The last time was ten years ago. Ten freaking years of drinking every day, very limited engagement with my family, very limited engagement with myself. Sure, nothing really awful happened during those ten years, but what a waste of ten years.

This time I'm at peace with the fact that I'll never drink again. It took me a long time to get to the realization that I can't drink. I hope you can get to that point sooner than I.

Soberwolf

H Kitten have you got a plan

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html

Keep up the great work the fact your finding it more difficult should be a huge reminder of how important it is that you stay sober

FeelingGreat

Hi Kitten, firstly give yourself a time goal that's well out there. I started with a year, but the benefits were so obvious I kept going. If a year seems too long try 6 months.
The voice in your head is called an AV and it can be super persuasive. When it pipes up remember why you stopped drinking, and what you want to achieve. Where do you want to be in 12 months? Happy, proud of yourself or riddled with self reproach? You choose.

kitten29

Thank you everyone. Some really good food for thought and tools. All the best to everyone x

Fly N Buy

Glad you're here and grats' on a months - that's huge! Frankly, when I heard people gain 30 days, I thought some must be lying - no way I thought. Good for you!

Not everyone else drinks. In fact, the world surrounds us with a majority of people who don't drink at all or very little. When we have a drinking problem we just don't notice them.

You're in the right place - keep coming back, friend!!

Anna

I hope you feel better soon. You can always talk to your dr if you become concerned about your fatigue.

Kevin78

Well done for 1 month Kitten.
For me personally, I punished myself by giving myself targets, For me that was no good at all. I managed almost 2 months each time - If I was lucky. Each time my brain would tell me "It wasn't that bad, Was it?" I found the answer after I had relapsed, was YES. Using my AA tools, I find it best to keep it One Day At A Time. Keep sober for 1 day, and then the next, and so on. By going to AA and keeping it in the day, I have managed 8 Months. I have not heard of anyone go back out to drink again and be able to manage it. Don't be scared to go and try a meeting. It has done me the world of good.

All the best.

nyala

Hello Kitten,

One month is a fabulous milestone. Well done you !

I know that voice, and I listened to it a few times over the last couple of years. Each time , I found I was able to moderate for a short while, but not for long.

None of us can. This is why we are here. The trick really is to take things one day - one hour - one minute at a time, if necessary. And just make sure you go to bed sober.

For me, waking up without a hangover was my small little triumph for the day.

On a practical basis I highly recommend getting rid of any trace of booze in the house - and that includes that souvenir bottle of ouzo from way back when.

And reading and posting here at least once a day.

You have done the hardest part. Whenever these intrusive thoughts come to me I respond by thinking ( or saying out loud ) " how would drinking right now significantly improve matters?"

Sending good vibes to you up from Africa

Fradley

helpimalive

Hi kitten. This has been my downfall every single time I've drank again after any length of abstinence, yet I'm now in the same boat you are, almost: I'm 27 days sober, and starting to have these kinds of thoughts yet again. But they've never worked for me in the past. I'm writing out a narrative of the days and weeks after my last relapse, to figure out exactly how I went from that first night of drinking again--where everything actually was fine--to drinking three bottles of wine a night again and hating everything. Because I know, objectively, that's what will happen again if I decide once more that I'm "in control now," or, as you said, "reset."

thomas11

I went through that cycle for far too long. Once you get feeling good and healthy we tempt fate and think we are cured. usually, we are not. And we end up back where we started. Great job on one month. don't let your brain trick you into thinking the problem has been solved. Just my 2 cents.

kitten29

I haven't worked out how to reply individually yet, but my goodness thank you all so much! I haven't been to a meeting yet- I'm respectfully atheist so I wasn't sure but I guess I'll only know by trying. All these great ideas, thank you friends, what a lovely boost. I'm going to spend some time tomorrow before work figuring out how to implement trying them. So far I have found reading novels to be very very helpful, as well as jigsaw puzzles- things to occupy my mind. I recommend them very much, although of course I'm still a newbie!
Good wishes from London to all of you z

Dee74

Thoughts that maybe you overreacted and that you drinking problem might not be so bad is pure addictive thinking and it's very common- at least it was with me.

Don't confuse abstinence with control.

Your life is good and getting better because you stopped drinking, not because you suddenly gained control

If you go back to drinking, all that bad stuff that you stopped drinking to avoid, will still be there - I guarantee it.

D

SoberInCLE

When I quit, I journaled everything online. I am glad that I did because I was miserable. Having a written record is much better than relying on your memory.

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Kitten!!

Reset