day 4 and this sucks
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Join Date: Aug 2015
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day 4 and this sucks
Hi everyone, I have quit alcohol 4 days ago. Prior to the quit I was having roughly 4-6 a night.. .It didn't really ruin my family or my relationship . I feel like quitting is ruining these things for me. I have been so irritable , depressed...reclusing myself into my bedroom . I have found that my tolerance for mild annoyances has dwindled to damn near no patience .
Day 1- all I had was insomnia and cravings
Day 2- insomnia craving anxiety and depression .
Day 3- insomnia craving, anxiety , depression. Second guessing my life and my happiness.
Day 4 (Today ) insomnia craving big time Friday night, anxiety, depression and again feeling as if I am not happy with my life .
Why do I feel so ****** when I hear how great everyone feels after quitting? I don't feel good about it at all...idk .. I know that if I was drinking 4 beers it never led to more.. ..I just love the relaxing feeling and stress relief that comes with the 4 beers a night.
I feel absolutely miserable (mentally )
Day 1- all I had was insomnia and cravings
Day 2- insomnia craving anxiety and depression .
Day 3- insomnia craving, anxiety , depression. Second guessing my life and my happiness.
Day 4 (Today ) insomnia craving big time Friday night, anxiety, depression and again feeling as if I am not happy with my life .
Why do I feel so ****** when I hear how great everyone feels after quitting? I don't feel good about it at all...idk .. I know that if I was drinking 4 beers it never led to more.. ..I just love the relaxing feeling and stress relief that comes with the 4 beers a night.
I feel absolutely miserable (mentally )
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 359
It does suck early on...no lie. And there are a lot of people that have extreme irritability as well.
Day 4 is an incredible accomplishment, but it is also such a short amount of time to make a determination on whether or not sobriety is worth it. And it is, it really, really is.
Have you spoken with your spouse? We're they aware that you had problematic drinking? The best thing I think would be opening that line of communication so things will not deteriorate.
Four days...the longest four days ever...but you are so close to being over this part. The acute alcohol withdrawal where you do physically and mentally just feel like a pile of manure, you've almost conquered that hurdle.
Also have you spoken with your doctor? He/she will be able to advise you and point you in the direction of things that will help as you make this transition into recovery.
Don't base your recovery on that of others, base it on you and where you want your future to lead - and get it ready and make it happen.
The awful feeling will pass and when it does you will feel amazing also, can't wait to see you check in on day 5
Day 4 is an incredible accomplishment, but it is also such a short amount of time to make a determination on whether or not sobriety is worth it. And it is, it really, really is.
Have you spoken with your spouse? We're they aware that you had problematic drinking? The best thing I think would be opening that line of communication so things will not deteriorate.
Four days...the longest four days ever...but you are so close to being over this part. The acute alcohol withdrawal where you do physically and mentally just feel like a pile of manure, you've almost conquered that hurdle.
Also have you spoken with your doctor? He/she will be able to advise you and point you in the direction of things that will help as you make this transition into recovery.
Don't base your recovery on that of others, base it on you and where you want your future to lead - and get it ready and make it happen.
The awful feeling will pass and when it does you will feel amazing also, can't wait to see you check in on day 5
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Hi FreeSpirit 
you had a number of identical threads so I consolidated them down to this one.
It's a little slow right now but you will find support & responses on this forum
I didn't feel great after quitting at all. I didn't feel great for a month or more.
The more years we drink, the more we're at risk of experiencing harsher and harsher withdrawals, regardless of how little we feel we might drink.
It's called alcoholic kindling.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...lly-again.html
The good news is you won't feel this bad for ever - I hope the next few days will see a marked improvement for you
D
you had a number of identical threads so I consolidated them down to this one.
It's a little slow right now but you will find support & responses on this forum
I didn't feel great after quitting at all. I didn't feel great for a month or more.
The more years we drink, the more we're at risk of experiencing harsher and harsher withdrawals, regardless of how little we feel we might drink.
It's called alcoholic kindling.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...lly-again.html
The good news is you won't feel this bad for ever - I hope the next few days will see a marked improvement for you
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
H Freespirit. Glad you're back giving it another go. Did you speak to your doctor about those health worries or did they sort themselves out?
Just try to remember, that day 4, while being a fantastic achievement, is also very early, and of course you will be feeling raw. Alcoholics are notoriously irritable and discontent, and that's half the lure of the booze - because it offers temporary relief from those feelings.
Do you believe yourself to be an alcoholic?
And if not, why do you think that sobriety has been so elusive for you?
I think that finding new (or remember old) relaxation methods and stress relief might be helpful. It's hard to give ideas for this, because what one person finds relaxing doesn't always do it for someone else. Anna had a great thread on here the other day re mindfulness though, and that can really help. I'll see f I ca find it and put a link on...
...here http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ty-attack.html
But then, one of the things that kept me stuck in the cycle wasn't so much that I needed relief from stress, but that I had a skewed (as I now know - alcoholic) perspective of life, and my place in it. How I fitted in (or didn't). And my role in it (firmly centre-stage was my thinking!). That skewed perspective (of MINE) threw up countless stress-inducing thoughts a day. And they were completely un-neccessary. The relief that I have found through recovery has been to do with learning to recognising those thoughts, and instead of grabbing them because they're 'mine', making the decision to less that bait float by.
Things will get better over time as the obsession for drink fades, but the obsession never fades if you feed it, (even if only 4 beers a night) so please don't pick up that first drink. That would just feed the obsession and drag out your pain.
Hoping you find some stress-busting relaxation in your weekend and feel better soon.
Just try to remember, that day 4, while being a fantastic achievement, is also very early, and of course you will be feeling raw. Alcoholics are notoriously irritable and discontent, and that's half the lure of the booze - because it offers temporary relief from those feelings.
Do you believe yourself to be an alcoholic?
And if not, why do you think that sobriety has been so elusive for you?
I think that finding new (or remember old) relaxation methods and stress relief might be helpful. It's hard to give ideas for this, because what one person finds relaxing doesn't always do it for someone else. Anna had a great thread on here the other day re mindfulness though, and that can really help. I'll see f I ca find it and put a link on...
...here http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ty-attack.html
But then, one of the things that kept me stuck in the cycle wasn't so much that I needed relief from stress, but that I had a skewed (as I now know - alcoholic) perspective of life, and my place in it. How I fitted in (or didn't). And my role in it (firmly centre-stage was my thinking!). That skewed perspective (of MINE) threw up countless stress-inducing thoughts a day. And they were completely un-neccessary. The relief that I have found through recovery has been to do with learning to recognising those thoughts, and instead of grabbing them because they're 'mine', making the decision to less that bait float by.
Things will get better over time as the obsession for drink fades, but the obsession never fades if you feed it, (even if only 4 beers a night) so please don't pick up that first drink. That would just feed the obsession and drag out your pain.
Hoping you find some stress-busting relaxation in your weekend and feel better soon.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 31
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Hi FreeSpirit
you had a number of identical threads so I consolidated them down to this one.
It's a little slow right now but you will find support & responses on this forum
I didn't feel great after quitting at all. I didn't feel great for a month or more.
The more years we drink, the more we're at risk of experiencing harsher and harsher withdrawals, regardless of how little we feel we might drink.
It's called alcoholic kindling.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...lly-again.html
The good news is you won't feel this bad for ever - I hope the next few days will see a marked improvement for you
D
you had a number of identical threads so I consolidated them down to this one.
It's a little slow right now but you will find support & responses on this forum
I didn't feel great after quitting at all. I didn't feel great for a month or more.
The more years we drink, the more we're at risk of experiencing harsher and harsher withdrawals, regardless of how little we feel we might drink.
It's called alcoholic kindling.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...lly-again.html
The good news is you won't feel this bad for ever - I hope the next few days will see a marked improvement for you
D
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 31
Originally Posted by Beccybean
H Freespirit. Glad you're back giving it another go. Did you speak to your doctor about those health worries or did they sort themselves out?
Just try to remember, that day 4, while being a fantastic achievement, is also very early, and of course you will be feeling raw. Alcoholics are notoriously irritable and discontent, and that's half the lure of the booze - because it offers temporary relief from those feelings.
Do you believe yourself to be an alcoholic?
And if not, why do you think that sobriety has been so elusive for you?
I think that finding new (or remember old) relaxation methods and stress relief might be helpful. It's hard to give ideas for this, because what one person finds relaxing doesn't always do it for someone else. Anna had a great thread on here the other day re mindfulness though, and that can really help. I'll see f I ca find it and put a link on...
...here http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ty-attack.html
But then, one of the things that kept me stuck in the cycle wasn't so much that I needed relief from stress, but that I had a skewed (as I now know - alcoholic) perspective of life, and my place in it. How I fitted in (or didn't). And my role in it (firmly centre-stage was my thinking!). That skewed perspective (of MINE) threw up countless stress-inducing thoughts a day. And they were completely un-neccessary. The relief that I have found through recovery has been to do with learning to recognising those thoughts, and instead of grabbing them because they're 'mine', making the decision to less that bait float by.
Things will get better over time as the obsession for drink fades, but the obsession never fades if you feed it, (even if only 4 beers a night) so please don't pick up that first drink. That would just feed the obsession and drag out your pain.
Hoping you find some stress-busting relaxation in your weekend and feel better soon.
Just try to remember, that day 4, while being a fantastic achievement, is also very early, and of course you will be feeling raw. Alcoholics are notoriously irritable and discontent, and that's half the lure of the booze - because it offers temporary relief from those feelings.
Do you believe yourself to be an alcoholic?
And if not, why do you think that sobriety has been so elusive for you?
I think that finding new (or remember old) relaxation methods and stress relief might be helpful. It's hard to give ideas for this, because what one person finds relaxing doesn't always do it for someone else. Anna had a great thread on here the other day re mindfulness though, and that can really help. I'll see f I ca find it and put a link on...
...here http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ty-attack.html
But then, one of the things that kept me stuck in the cycle wasn't so much that I needed relief from stress, but that I had a skewed (as I now know - alcoholic) perspective of life, and my place in it. How I fitted in (or didn't). And my role in it (firmly centre-stage was my thinking!). That skewed perspective (of MINE) threw up countless stress-inducing thoughts a day. And they were completely un-neccessary. The relief that I have found through recovery has been to do with learning to recognising those thoughts, and instead of grabbing them because they're 'mine', making the decision to less that bait float by.
Things will get better over time as the obsession for drink fades, but the obsession never fades if you feed it, (even if only 4 beers a night) so please don't pick up that first drink. That would just feed the obsession and drag out your pain.
Hoping you find some stress-busting relaxation in your weekend and feel better soon.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 31
Originally Posted by Kallistia
It does suck early on...no lie. And there are a lot of people that have extreme irritability as well.
Day 4 is an incredible accomplishment, but it is also such a short amount of time to make a determination on whether or not sobriety is worth it. And it is, it really, really is.
Have you spoken with your spouse? We're they aware that you had problematic drinking? The best thing I think would be opening that line of communication so things will not deteriorate.
Four days...the longest four days ever...but you are so close to being over this part. The acute alcohol withdrawal where you do physically and mentally just feel like a pile of manure, you've almost conquered that hurdle.
Also have you spoken with your doctor? He/she will be able to advise you and point you in the direction of things that will help as you make this transition into recovery.
Don't base your recovery on that of others, base it on you and where you want your future to lead - and get it ready and make it happen.
The awful feeling will pass and when it does you will feel amazing also, can't wait to see you check in on day 5
Day 4 is an incredible accomplishment, but it is also such a short amount of time to make a determination on whether or not sobriety is worth it. And it is, it really, really is.
Have you spoken with your spouse? We're they aware that you had problematic drinking? The best thing I think would be opening that line of communication so things will not deteriorate.
Four days...the longest four days ever...but you are so close to being over this part. The acute alcohol withdrawal where you do physically and mentally just feel like a pile of manure, you've almost conquered that hurdle.
Also have you spoken with your doctor? He/she will be able to advise you and point you in the direction of things that will help as you make this transition into recovery.
Don't base your recovery on that of others, base it on you and where you want your future to lead - and get it ready and make it happen.
The awful feeling will pass and when it does you will feel amazing also, can't wait to see you check in on day 5
Oh and no doctor for me...last time I went she didn't take me serious I felt and I already have a terrible credit score from doctor bills sent to collections... Trying to avoid them at all costs unless emergency.
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Yes - that horrible brain fog. I called it 'washing machine head'. It's nasty.
And if it helps - which it might not - Personally, I certainly didn't feel better immediately. But now I can happily report that my life is at least 100% better.
And if it helps - which it might not - Personally, I certainly didn't feel better immediately. But now I can happily report that my life is at least 100% better.
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Originally Posted by freespirit1986
Hi, thank you for the information . I sure hope it doesn't last long and I start to see benefits from my choice to quit.
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Originally Posted by Beccybean
Yes - that horrible brain fog. I called it 'washing machine head'. It's nasty.
And if it helps - which it might not - Personally, I certainly didn't feel better immediately. But now I can happily report that my life is at least 100% better.
And if it helps - which it might not - Personally, I certainly didn't feel better immediately. But now I can happily report that my life is at least 100% better.
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Originally Posted by freespirit1986
... I talked to him today about how I really just wanted a beer and he said, the liquor store is still open... I was like. No, I can't do that and why would he condone me going back to alcohol in the first place is beyond me. I feel like I am my only support team. ..
If you want support, there will be some out there for you. You need to look for it. That may seem harsh, but it's the only way of accessing help. In my area there is both SMART and AA, and also some smaller groups. I chose AA because there are more meeting to choose from, and my now deceased Step-Dad was AA (and so the religious stuff that others are put off by didn't worry me as I knew it worked for him and he wasn't 'religious').I suppose AA felt less threatening to me because of his positive experiences for many years. Plus I noticed that there were a few women-only meetings which I found encouraging. The support, encouragement and wisdom that I've found through AA has been amazing. It might be worth looking into. Feeling isolated makes sobriety, and working on recovery, so much harder.
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Originally Posted by freespirit1986
How long did it take before you felt better ?
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From my experience, and many others from reading this forum the last month or so, you can stop now at 4-6 beers or wait until you're in your late 40's or 50's when 4-6 ounces of vodka simply gets you ready to start drinking for the day or night. I think the key to staying clean is to find something you like more than booze. Good luck.
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Originally Posted by Beccybean
I got to about a month and thought I was going a bit mad. That's when I realised I needed some support and went to AA. I immediately found some relief, just by meeting others who understood what I was going through, who could talk calmly to me despite my edginess and angst, who smile at me even though I couldn't smile at them first, who could talk to me with kindness even though I'd become spiky and raw and wasn't capable of being kind myself. They were patient and explained what they'd done to get better themselves. Some of it sounded a bit mad. And some of it sounded too simple to make any difference. But I started to get a bit of hope from the fact that they'd got better, and maybe I could get some of what they'd got, and got willing to follow their advice and try things their way. And those things made me feel stronger and more positive. And that's when I started to get a bit better.
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Originally Posted by dcg
From my experience, and many others from reading this forum the last month or so, you can stop now at 4-6 beers or wait until you're in your late 40's or 50's when 4-6 ounces of vodka simply gets you ready to start drinking for the day or night. I think the key to staying clean is to find something you like more than booze. Good luck.
D♭7♭9♯9♯11♭13
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Originally Posted by freespirit1986
I understand, but I've been drinking for 8 years...
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Originally Posted by freespirit1986
I see... I don't know If I want to so that yet though . I'm glad it worked for you. I may try it in the near future .
This thread is always a good one for reference as well... http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
I think that it might help to just accept that your other half isn't necessarily refusing you something that he's capable of giving you when he doesn't support you to stay sober in the way you'd like. I can only offer you MY experiences. He can only offer HIS. (Which are probably non-existent). He's not keeping it from you. He hasn't got it to give you no matter how much he want to. If you know how he could act that would help you, then only you can share that with him and give him a chance to learn that new way of doing stuff.
The reason I'm saying this is that your post reminded me of how much emotional energy I wasted in that first month, being angry and resentful that I was all alone, and nobody was helping me or could be bothered to stay sober with me, etc. etc. My OH was probably just running for cover in an act of self-preservation from my self-pity and resentment lol. A lot of the ladies I'm friends with at AA related to all that when I mentioned this to them once, and many of them remembered thinking and doing the exact same things. I'm not saying you are being this way - just pointing out where those kind of thoughts can lead us if we don't make the decision not to entertain those thoughts (which our Alcoholic Voices are very good at popping into our heads).
Take care.
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FS
You are in a difficult period right now. It took me about a month before I really began to feel good. Then after that I was surprised that each week got better and better. I couldn't believe how great I felt.
BTW, what dcg said is absolutely true. Hang in there. It's really worth it.
You are in a difficult period right now. It took me about a month before I really began to feel good. Then after that I was surprised that each week got better and better. I couldn't believe how great I felt.
BTW, what dcg said is absolutely true. Hang in there. It's really worth it.
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